Joyce's ranting ground

Updates!!

2010-12-16T15:45:00.004+08:00

[Recent events...]

It's been some time since I last updated....

But I am living a good life:) Life has been good....

Even though I have to say goodbyes to my best friend (I miss her but I am happy for her!!) cos' she is in Australia now, and my K2 kids cos' they graduated:(

It was a grand and great graduation, all my kids performed so well, I was swelling with pride! Dear came to help me, and he is quite good with kids I must say(Thanks dear!) :)

We applied for BTO flat....and got it on our FIRST TRY!!

Didn't really think we'll get it cos' everyone said it's not easy...our friends try and so far, I have friends who haven't get it after trying 4 times, some 6 times...

I wasn't desperate for one right now... just applied cos' my dear Eileen-jie said it's difficult to get it...

And voi˜la! Got it! No need to waste another $10! Queue no 175 (maybe I should get 4D) Thank God!

It's in Bukit Panjang (going to be Eileen-jie's neighbour!!), which is the nearest we can have to our parents' home in Jurong, next to Taman Jurong or Jurong West Extension or Queenstown?

Oh well. As long as there's a flat and I am not into BIG houses, so it's good:)

I am going to start my Master soon....so I am in need of cash... Need to work hard in the plans that me and dear have!

Generally, life's good. It's my December holidays now, and we went to Batam! Not many photos cos' actually the environment there is quite bad....the air mainly. But it was still a fun trip! So I will post some photos up in the next entry!

School's starting in two weeks' time. Oh! and my pay rise! HEEEE:)

I love my new laptop!!!!

2010-05-11T18:21:00.002+08:00

[ Quick updates ]

Firstly, for all those who are concerned, thank you. MOE was good to me, that's all I will say. It went well, so well that's it's unbelievable. Must be cos of all the blessings I am getting.

Secondly, I am applying for my masters soon!! And that means NEW LAPTOP!!!

Super happy with my new laptop:) I bought my first Apple laptop, third Apple product. Macbook pro.

For those of you who know me, I used to hate Apple products. I felt that they are so user-unfriendly.

Then when all the ipod hype came, I got my ipod classic, which double confirmed my hatred for Apple cos well, I don't like ipod classic, cos it's so troublesome when your own personal itunes is down and you need to re-download, your old songs will be gone. I wrote something about this in one of my entry last time. Actually if you ask me I still don't like ipod and itunes.

But iPhone came along and made my impression of Apple changed drastically. It was so easy to use, and surfing net is such a breeze and all the apps and games, I simply fell in love...

Yeah I know, I am weak and easily influenced into the mainstream popular culture. But who cares?? It's really good and easy to use! Just like Macbook!

I don't need to download anti-virus cos trojan is very much not available in Mac! Thats the thing I love most! No more lagggggy screen cos of trojan.

The downside is mac can't play many games that are supported by microsoft, but who cares??? I don't play much pc games nowadays. I don't even play on com at all, I either play with my psp or iphone....Oh, and of course windows are not pre-installed.

But nice Mel says she has iworks. So it's solved cos i only need microsoft word or ppt.

Anyway my macbook pro is super pretty...even though it's not the white macbook but I value specs more.

Yay! Thanks to Mel cos she is the one who made me decide to buy Mac in the end, I was contemplating between Fujitsu(which is good) and Mac. And I can't decide cos' I know they are both good(for mac it's after much research and feedback cos I use Fujitsu I know it's good cos I use 6 years and it's still moving)

But Mel had both Fujitsu and Mac and said once she had her Mac she never looked back, and I totally agree with her.

Love it.

P/S: Sorry for the raving...I am so happy and I just love it!

Updates, updates.

2010-04-14T19:12:00.003+08:00

[ K2 madness ]

Yes. Now I know why one of my colleague threatened to leave and left my work place.

She just joined last year and she was thrown into a K2 class. No, make that two K2 classes. Cos' that's what we teachers at our work place got to do. We have two classes.

For me, taking two classes was a challenge at first cos' I am used to the childcare setting, where I only take one class.

Anyway, I adapted to it cos' luckily, I started from nursery.

Nursery was challenging only for the new children who cried. Once they were settled down, nursery is quite ok...

In comparison with K2. I never seem to finish my marking. No matter how much marking I finish today, tomorrow there will be new stacks of marking awaiting you.

Cos' the children at my work place do tons of work at K2. Honestly, I feel it only benefits the children who learn things quickly.

Then, there are the many big stage boards that we have to do and change and do and change.

And on top of that, the usual classroom boards also needed to be change, practice for performances end of term, outings, etc, etc...and K2 concert practice just started. I guess the full blown madness has not yet reached me.

But before I worry about that, I have one more important thing I have to worry about.

MOE.

Yeah. They are coming down to my school. It has to do with their accreditation programme. From what I have read from my booklet so far, it works something like ISO?

You know how our government likes to rate things? Yeah, apparently, kindergartens are getting their ratings too.

Apparently, some of our school teachers(most senior ones) have to rate ourselves first. Then after we send it in, MOE will come down to observe whether we are as good as we rate ourselves to be. The final step is after the visit, MOE will then rate us accordingly, if we are really good, we will get the best rating...A1 or something.

They will do two things during their visit: Observation of one selected class(by the principal) and Interview(of the chosen 2-3 teachers by the principal)

Funny thing is, I wasn't one of the teachers who rate our school. I seriously have no idea what is going on.

But I was chosen for both the observation and interview.

My lucky class got chosen for observation, and naturally I am chosen for interview as well.

I heard there will be three MOE inspectors following me around to observe how I teach and manage the children, AND after that I will be interviewed by them personally about everything from school motto, vision, planning of curriculum to.....I don't know? hygiene of the school??

So no big deal. Right. I am strung up like hell.

I tried to look at this positively, like perhaps my boss likes my teaching very much or perhaps I am such a good teacher....

Honestly, I am a simple-minded person. I don't like attention at all, especially whether or not boss thinks highly of me etc...I really like to mind my own business. I really don't like the idea of such a huge important responsibility to be placed on me...

Cos' honestly, I don't feel I am good. I mean, this is the rating of our school you know? What if I fail? Like if I do not conduct a good lesson....I mean honestly, I didn't do very well for my field practicum you know...

And there are so many better teachers than me....Jenny is very good you know? She should have gotten both the interview and observation instead of only the interview.

I should really try to look at this positively before I get a nervous breakdown. And you know how unpredictable children can be. If they are really rowdy that day....if my lesson goes wrong...if the lesson is not what the MOE wants...etc, etc...these are just some of the things I am worried about.

Now you guys should roughly know why I haven't been blogging? Cos' I have been so busy at work...when I reach home all I want to do is sleep and laze around.

Gah! I have to stop worrying!!

Wish me luck!! It will happen at the end of April....*keeping fingers cross*

New year new challenges

2009-12-30T00:21:00.007+08:00

[ Last few days of 2009]

Yes. Since it's the second last day of 2009, I just want to reflect on the past year and say I don't want to waste my entry on this friend who hurt me anymore. Someone who doesn't know how to reflect and apologise and only knows how to complain to a third party how she was being hurt by me without thinking whether she DID anything wrong too.

But it's a good lesson learnt and through bad times I see true friends:)

The greatest lesson of the year is that I have finally tasted the feeling of being stabbed at the back by someone whom I treated as a good friend who I treated sincerely and even when she hurt me I still apologise for my part cos I truly felt bad and wanted to be her friend.

A good friend who I stood up for, never said(past tense) a single bad word about, encouraged sincerely, whom I never minded coming along for my dates( ask Andre and Suqi when they tag along) etc. Just like how I treat ALL my other friends. I never had any problems with them.

And what I got in return for the genuine offer of friendship was how self-centered, brainless, lazy, emo drama queen etc( yes, there are more nasty words about me) which I never get before from other friends that I have treated in the same way towards this person.

And stupid people like me need OTHER PEOPLE to tell me what's going on if not I would have gone on treating this person as a friend without knowing my flaws irked this person so badly she only wants my best friend's friendship and hence can say so many things about me and when things happen, it's always JOYCE'S FAULT cos she is too emo and self centered.

But I guess everyone at a point of time will have to learn a lesson on trust, and now I know why some of my friends are so guarded and always warned me.

Anyway, there is no point in going on cos' there is no need to go into details now about what this person said behind my back about me, the trust is broken and I learn now.

But I am not going to be cynical. Maybe someday I will be able to say what really happened without any emo cos' I don't want to be called a drama queen for my inability to control tears. I cry when I am sad, or angry or both, can?

But I am not going to fill my heart with hatred. It's a tiring deal. I hated a girl who was nasty to me before and I learnt it's a tiring deal. If I am going to start hating people who hurt me, I am going to die young la, thank goodness there aren't many people who hurt me.

Anyway, this year is going to end and I don't want to linger on the past mistakes anymore. :)

I am going to face a whole new lot of challenges next year. K2 classes are going to be a challenge with camp, graduation and lessons preparing for primary one.

Especially when I got news today from my boss that I have 6 new boys. SIX! Five PRCs and one Indian. I am so going to die while managing them. If you see a fat Joyce or an old wrinkled Joyce please don't be alarmed.

And also Eileen is going to due soon for delivery and I don't want her to suffer. So it means whether I like it or not at some point in time I have to be in charge. And I might be taking my masters leh? I have some other plans for it as well. Hmm.

On lighter note, I can't wait for new year's eve and day and the weekend. Plenty to enjoy as it's packed with activities that I might not even have time for dear:x

Anyway, happy new year to all! Wish you all good health and happiness:)

P/S: Is my English failing me? I didn't mention or imply that anyone is snatching my friend, did I? Strange. I don't want friends who don't want me as a friend. Cos if they can be snatched away, I don't think they are worthy of my friendship and I blame them more than the person doing the snatching. This is my belief since I was in primary school.

Trust and self protection

2009-12-23T02:53:00.005+08:00

[ Learning to protect myself ]

Everyone says I must learn how to protect myself.

When you want to help other people, they say, don't just stupidly show your true self, and introduce everyone in your world to the person you want to help. Like your boyfriend, your best friend, friends etc.

Cos you can never count on whether this person appreciates it. Meaning he or she might just start to dislike what you do or say and prefers your other friends' company. Cos you never know what this person will say to your friends about you, or that he or she can be trusted to be a friend enough for you to reflect on themselves rather than just pinpointing your mistakes.

And the best part is sometimes the person you helped might be so blinded that they didn't know they are also making the mistakes that they pinpoint you of. It's betrayal to the ultimate sense from the back.

That's what true friends do. Even if my friends don't tell me about my mistakes, but when they all start to ignore me, I will reflect on it. Rather than blaming and questioning them and thinking I have no fault cos they don't tell me. Cos that's what true friends are for. I know if Suqi (or any of my close friends) ever do that, I will reflect on myself even if she doesn't want to talk about it.

But that's the problem about me. I just trust people easily and as long as you want me as a friend, I will be your friend and tell and share with you everything about me, like my problems, my past etc, even if I know you only for awhile.

But I have learnt that it can be used against you. You can be seen as self-centered rather than seen as sharing cos not everyone appreciates sharing. I always thought that as long as you share and give a part of yourself to your friend, they will appreciate it.

Apparently not, as there are all kinds of people in this world. What I thought of giving part of myself may seem different to others.

It's the same about helping people. Everyone else that are smart told me that they will never help someone by introducing their own close friends to the person they want to help. Looks like I am the only stupid one.

Nvm. I learnt my lesson. Enough about that.

I was feeling really down for the past few weeks. I am grateful for my brother. I would have felt so alone without him.

Yes, I know. I said it before. But that's the thing. I never ask or intrude his time when I was down. I mean, I will feel damn paiseh and pathetic if I keep taking up his time, by keep hanging around with him and his friends etc.just cos' I'm down and need company. Especially now that he has a girl friend.

Yet he took the initiative to keep me company. Though he did not introduce me to all his friends(which guy will? No guy I know did that) just so I have some company, he just kept asking me out, just the two of us. (actually I will be super paiseh if I keep hanging out with my younger brother's friends cos' I will feel like I really have no life, so I am really glad I did not do it just so I have his company) I even ask him to go out with his girl friend or his buddies, no need to keep me company , but he is really sweet cos' he insisted on keeping me company.

And even when he reassured me that he rather keep me company than hang out with his girlfriend and friends, I still feel bad so I kept apologizing.

My brother really has grown up hasn't he? To rather spend time with his ol' sis just cos' she is down, than his pretty girlfriend.

I still feel bad cos he has his own life and need own space with his life without his sister tagging along all the time:(

I shall do something for him, I am not that thick skinned ok:x

Grateful and touched

2009-12-21T02:38:00.006+08:00

[ Thank you my friends ]

I have made mistakes. Recently, someone whom I treated as a friend hurt me badly.

I felt discouraged and wonder whether it's my problem. Whether I was the one that made this friend hurt me, cos I have too many flaws so this person can't stand me and had to stab me at e back, was what I wondered. People who truly know me knows I feel bad and guilty easily, and care too much of other people's opinion. So yeah, I just dwell on my flaws, even though I was angry too.

And it doesn't help matters when I also quarreled with the person I love.

But it's times like this that make you realise how much you are loved by the people around you and I should not focus on the persons that hurt me. I can't make everyone like me. If my flaws so irked the friend, I should gladly accept it as I should not take friends who still stood by me despite my flaws forgranted. They are the ones that make me realise I am not so bad or selfish, and I really want to thank them.

I want to thank my best friend Suqi, for knowing, accepting and encouraging me when I am down. For appreciating my efforts and care towards her because she never once made me feel like I am a self-centered person.

I want to thank Faith, for all the same reasons I thanked Suqi for.

I want to thank Lina aka. Nana and the two Mels that I know, for trusting me to be a good friend and never once doubt my words. For encouraging me and showing love to me when I am down.

I want to thank Eileen Da Jie, as well as Cindy Er Jie, for showing unconditional love. Cos they treat me like their small sister, even when they barely know me, and they never once felt I am selfish even though I seem to take more from them than give. Cos they say it's their responsibility to take care of me as I am younger and have much to learn about people and life despite the fact that they are busy and for Eileen, sick. I am grateful for their unconditional love.

I want to thank Tricia, Hannah, and Andrielle. For showing genuine love and concern even though we do not know each other long enough, they already accept me as part of the group and take care of me. And thanking them for their willingness to listen to my problems while it seems like I have not heard about theirs, and took time to give me advices.

I want to thank Fion, Jun Ren and Andre for listening to my problems and unbiased opinions. For trusting that I am a friend worthy of their time to listen to my problems and showing concern despite their busy schedule.

I want to thank Sean, my best guy friend of years. He might be Beng and loud, but he is the most loyal and faithful friend that you can find. He can do almost anything for his pals. Behind his gangster exterior lies a great listener who will do anything for his close friends.

Last but not least, I want to thank my sweet brother and confidant and friend, who is mature emotionally beyond his years. For giving me a consoling hug and buying gifts and simply listening to me cry(yes, crubaby me) without frustration. I am glad I can confide in him, and he is the person who knows me the longest and best, since we are partners in crime. The only person that I can entirely trust my tears to without me feeling like I am a cry baby. I thank God that I told my parents I want a younger brother. Even though I try not to disturb him now as he has a girlfriend(not very nice isn't it? Always taking up his time when his girlfriend deserves the privacy and his attention), he will still want to spend time with me, even though I can be nasty and bad tempered.

And even though I can't think of any other people's names at the moment, in case I left out any, I just want to thank people who took time to really listen to me without judging me. It really means a lot to me as I know now who are my true friends, and not to be naive in trusting people.

I just realised how much love I was shown when I listed down the names I want to thank. I am really touched. I should really be thankful and look on the bright side of life rather than mourning about who hurt me.

A lesson I learnt about life

2009-12-13T03:01:00.009+08:00

[ About self reflection and critising about others' shortcomings]

Nobody in this world is perfect.

Something happened that made me realised how true this is. Sometimes we love to criticise about other people's flaws without taking a good look at ourselves.

Am I that good? When I say somebody is clingy or immature or stupid etc. Am I any better?

And what gives me the right to say that about other people? Is this a mature and wise thing to do?

I am not perfect or mature and wise, but I look at great people like Mother Theresa or Gandhi or Jesus or Buddha and I realise that they embraced peoples' flaws. They do not laugh or criticise other people. They only use wise words to retaliate when people do them wrong. No adjective words used.

I learnt that words are powerful tools. It can hurt people in ways unimaginable. Words can cause war, deaths, heartbreaks, distrust, unmendable scars and tears, just like words can sooth and bring joy to life. I will never again have the belief of "say only what, no need money" or "it's only a joke what, so serious for what, can't take a joke?"

Do you see wise and mature people saying that? Only teens who are ignorant say that. I am not young anymore. I have to be a responsible person. And that includes the words I used cos' I am responsible for them. Just like I am responsible for my own actions and decisions. If words are not important then the law won't be bothered with slander charges anymore.

When I say things like brainless or childish or self-centered etc. about a person, who am I to say such things that's so judging? Who was I to judge? Even great people like Jesus and Buddha did not do that. What gives me the right to judge which results in hurting people? How will I feel when someone use such words on me or laugh at me even though it might be true as it's my flaw? I definitely will feel hurt, no matter how true it is.

I am not guilt free from this. All I am glad to say is that at least I never use such adjectives on friends and people who are close and have been kind to me. I shall watch my mouth from now on as I know how it feels to be on the receiving end.

And I have learnt from one wise friend of mine(at least compared to me) that these kind of criticisms and judging often results in gossiping. I shall not engage in bitching gossips. It's never a mature thing to do, and you will never know when it's going to come back to you.

And I have to stay away from people who do that if I really want to change as sad to say, I am an easily influenced person. Since I am not perfect, I am in no position to tell them off, judge them or to stop them cos I am no saint.

But I will abstain from it.

I am just glad I realise this cos there are people who say such critical words on other people or even to their friends in front or behind their backs and thought it's ok because they are too self-centered to realise these words hurt. They just thought they are being straightforward. At least I realise this and I will stop being so self-centered.

Nobody is perfect. And I am responsible for the words I use on other people. I must remember that.

Sethie and Christy

2009-11-24T23:23:00.002+08:00

[ Favouritism again ]

:X Yeah I know.

But I really want to bring my Sethie and Christy out.

If I wait until next year, I feel it's sooooooooooo long till next year and such a short time spent with them.

So with their parents' permission, I am all set to go. I told Eileen about it and she said it's fine. So that settles my uneasiness of whether it's right or not since she worked at my school for so long and all.

Now just left with this question: Where should I go???

*ponders*

It's complicated

2009-11-24T23:12:00.002+08:00

[ Wish things were as simple as the past ]

Things used to be so simple.

I talk without worrying about whether others will doubt my words.

Now, I have learnt to watch my words, keep my distance, and check my behaviour.

If not, it will be the start of endless criticisms.

And it makes me feel like I am a worthless piece of shit.

Gone too soon....

2009-11-05T18:26:00.005+08:00

[ This is it ]

I have watched the movie.

To me, it was a good movie. Cos' it brings about a certain closure to my idol's death.

But watching the movie makes me feel very sad. I was quite affected when I heard that Michael Jackson died. Cos' I was sooooooooooooo looking forward to his "This is it" concert. AND, the movie showed his rehearsals for the what-might-have-been concert. It would have been phenomenal.

And since I have watched his other concerts before, I would say if he is still alive, "This is it" will be his BEST ever.

Cos' it showcases not only the brilliantly put together concert, but Michael's talents, as well as the amazing costumes, 3D effects and many more. He has many talents besides singing and dancing you know. Watch it, and you will be surprised:)

Thinking of it makes me feel sad, thinking of what could have been:(

Anyway, I started liking Michael Jackson when I was in primary school. At that time, my dad had this LD, yes, LD of Michael Jackson's number one hits MTV. I was so impressed with his dancing, singing, inspiring messages and innocence.

Innocence because in the LD, it showed the making of the MTV for the song "Jam", and he was pranking around like a kid with that Macaulay Culkin(from Home Alone).

His dancing and singing were so uniquely one-of-a-kind and inspiring and make me want to sing and dance together with him as well. He was so energised, and he always sent positive message out to people, like saving the Earth, and children.

So I was really hoping to see his concert LIVE, you know? It would be a fantabulous experience.

Imagine my disappointment and sadness when he died. No more one-of-a-kind music and dancing.

And add on to my mixture of feelings was disgust too.

Disgusted at how people just could not stop gossiping and spreading rumors about him even AFTER he died.

I do not believe he was ever a paedophile. Just use your brain and think about it. I don't want to waste my breath and explain to stupid people why I do not believe he is a paedophile.

To me, "This is it" is a must watch if you are a big fan of Michael Jackson. Even though you may have the same sad feeling after watching it cos' of what might have been, you will still get to enjoy his performance(which he did not give his all cos' it was just rehearsals), as well as his other talents.

AND of course, like all his other concerts, you will start singing along with him. It's like a disease. Cos' I saw dear singing along too...haha:) I definitely wasn't the only one singing along when I watched the movie.

I'm gonna miss him...............

He's definitely gone too soon.

Sunday

2009-10-22T21:42:00.007+08:00

[ K2 graduation ]

Yeah, I know.

I rarely blogged. Yet I blogged 2 entries at one short.

I am really bored I guess.

It's end of the year and what is usually expected towards the end of the year at ANY childcare/kindergarten?

K2 graduation concert.

Any reputable kindergarten/childcare will have that. It is an important event.

This year I am not in charge too. But I feel the pressure coming cos' Boss already announced next year's classes arrangement for teachers.

GUESS WHAT???? No surprises, (but I am thankful), I am following up next year. To k2. With my children.

It means ONE MORE YEAR OF SEEING SETH~IE AND SOON WEE AND ALL MY KIDS!!!

It also means STRESS.

Cos' K2 has alot of important events. Namely, K2 concert (duh!)

And also K2 camp.

So two very important events to organise. I am sooooo going to die if I don't do well.

I am going to miss the kids when they leave me!!! ~Sad!!!~

Oops! I have digressed....back to the subject on hand.

This year's K2 concert, as usual, the Sunday before concert(which is on next Friday), all the staff had to go back. Except for two of my colleagues who live at Yishun.

My boss specifically asked us during meeting to bring ANY men we can spare. Her exact words, "Ask your boyfriend, husband, uncle, father, brother, NEIGHBOUR...any MAN that is available, to come and help us". Cos' she needs MEN to do all the MANLY stuff.

Like carrying heavy ladders. Yeah, one of my colleague is REALLY bringing her neighbour.

Eileen's Matthew can't come cos' he's on duty! Boss looooooooooves him cos' he is tall AND handy!

He can hang ANYTHING at the santuary cos' he is tall.

Last year, I asked dear to go he was so relunctant. Which I am fine....

But if everyone is bringing some MAN to help I feel bad that they know I have boyfriend and yet he is always not free, not very nice right? If Faith's lawyer boyfriend can come support her consecutively for two years despite his busy schedule and exams, somehow it sounds lame when I said he is busy....

That is not the main point. The main point is, I want dear to support me too! (Actually the real reason is also that I want to go home earlier, the more people, the faster we finish)

Whatever la! I am happy~!!

He is coming after my, *er-hem* powerful persuasion.

Woo~~so sweet:)

The power of love. (Heehee)

Severus Snape

2009-10-22T19:54:00.004+08:00

[ My favorite character in Harry Potter series ]

(SPOILERS ALERT!!!!)

Don't say I never warn you! If you are still reading, bear the consequences!

Anyone who knows me well enough will know I am a Harry Potter fan. So of course I love to read the books.

I have two favorite characters in the book. The first one is of course, Mr Harry Potter himself.

The second one, however, may come as a shock to some people.

Especially to those who did NOT read finish the books.

This character is a very complex person. He is the total opposite of Harry Potter. Cos' Harry Potter, if you are familiar with the series, is quite a simple person. He is brave, and he has a heart full of gold, or lots of love.

Either way, a typical protagonist.

My second favorite character, is so complex that I hated him at first. (At least in the stories, cos' in the movies, somehow Alan Rickman is such a charismatic Severus Snape)

Yeah. He is none other than Severus Snape. Not Hermione, not Ron, Dumbledore was my second favorite.

He made Dumbledore paled in comparison.

Even Dumbledore admired Snape for that.

Exactly what did Snape do that made me like him so much?

Actually I am more touched about what he did, cos' I cried when Harry Potter found out what he did after he died. Because all the truth came out.

Anything that touches my heart made me think. (Yeah, even if it's just a fiction story.)

Will you fall in love with a person at the age of 9?
Hmm....maybe.

Will you love that same person for more than a decade faithfully?
Yeah, I might.

How about loving that same person since 9 years old even though she/he hates you?
Maybe I will.

How about loving AND changing for that same person who not only hates you but married your archenemy and gave birth to a son that looks exactly like your archenemy?
Er....it's quite hard.

How about protecting the above mentioned son with your life by being maligned and accused of being a monster and killing?
Are you insane?

Well, that's roughly what Snape did. As evil and led astray he was, that he called the evil Lord Voldemort his master, he changed into a new leaf. Just so to protect the son whom the woman he loves gave birth to, with his arch enemy as the father. Harry Potter.

I was really shocked when I first knew why Snape did what he did. That he was not evil. I mean some websites already predicted that he is one of the good guys, but I could never fathom WHY he is the good guy. I never expect it to be because of his love for Lily Potter(Harry's mother).

A gist of the story goes like this:

He met Lily when he was about 9 years old? And at the first sight he fell in love, you know those kind of sweet child-like innocent puppy love. He was attracted to Lily's fun-loving nature and sunny character I supposed.

So they became good friends at first. They were good friends.

But they are from very different backgrounds. Snape is like Malfoy, born into an old magick bloodline family. So they love to be in Slytherin and do all the dark magic stuff, like Voldemort.

But Snape was poor, and greasy and slimy so James Potter(Harry's father) bullied him with his other friends, cos' they were from well-off families. They just found him weird and disliked the attention Lily gave to Snape, since James liked her.

Anyway, like any other friends, Lily and Snape quarreled. But it was Snape's fault for calling her a name that was unforgivable, thus Lily broke off their friendship, since she also disliked the fact that he hanged out too much with the evil Slytherin gang(Malfoy's dad, Lucius).

Snape was not perfect. Like any other human, he made alot of mistakes. One that even caused the death of the woman he loves. Yet, he learnt from them and was very remorseful about it.

What touches me the most is his love for Lily. How it had never changed. Even though she married the person that tortured him the most.

Because of his love, he was the one who protected Harry till the end at great risk of his own life. He had to be a double agent(which means lying to the evil Voldemort) for Dumbledore, or rather, Harry Potter. He had to bear the bad name of being Dumbledore's killer to do that.

He did not owe Lily or Dumbledore or Harry anything.

Yet, because of his love, he chose the right path and risked his life, and eventually died for his love.

No matter what happened, whatever she did, he still loved her.

Even though she didn't even know of his love. Even though he did not expect her to reciprocate his love.

He still loves her.........till the end.

P.S: According to the story, he is the third most powerful wizard, after Dumbledore and Voldemort. He is very smart.

Seth~ie

2009-10-12T16:34:00.005+08:00

[ Favoritism ]

I am like, one of the worst teachers ever.

I always try not to show favouritism towards the children of my class.

Those of you who know me will know who my favourite few are. And I do scold them or punish them if they misbehave.

Yet, last Friday, I did something unthinkable!!!!

I bought a JET PLANE LIGHTNING FAN for Seth.

I ought to be strike by the lightning. Seriously.

But I can't help it! Cute Seth keeps on saying that, "I am gonna be a jet plane pilot when I grow up."

Even when I coolly told him to choose an occupation from the following: teacher, bus driver, firefighter, doctor, nurse, police officer, he still showed me his big and teary eyes saying, "Can't choose jet plane pilot?" (mind you, Boss wants these few occupation for the class board, so have to limit the number of occupation)

Even when we went to the fire station, the firefighters cheerfully talked to him:
Firefighter: "Did you enjoy the visit around the fire station?"
Seth: "Yeah!"
Firefighter: "That's great! So do you want to be a firefighter when you grow up?"
Seth: "No! I want to be a jet plane pilot."

It's like someone chanting scriptures or something. Everyday, without fail, he would tell me he wants to be a jet plane pilot, and me, and his best pals Hao yuan and Christy, and Miss Neo will get to sit on his plane.

But p/s: Mr. Pilot says we're not allowed to touch anything on his jet plane, especially not the engine.

SO.....when I was at Kiddy Palace....when I saw this cheap and cute fan (with sweets inside):

When it's switched on, it has lights flashing at the centre of the propeller!

I can't help it. Kept thinking of Seth's words, "jet plane pilot" when I saw it. After struggling emotionally whether it is bad of me to be so biased, Faith encouraged me to buy it. I guess she feels for me that I am debating with myself.

It's also actually quite affordable if I am just buying one, cost about five bucks.

I felt so bad I told my colleagues about it.

But today, I felt that it is worth it. I don't mind being such a-bad-teacher-who-shows-favouritism-by-buying cos' I secretly showed Seth his present, and his reaction was soooooooooooooooooooo cute.

He smiled and exclaimed, "WOW!" when he first saw it. Then he said in his whispering voice, "I will not tell my friends our secret". (Cos' I told him I will give it to someone else if he tells any of the children)

My guess for his reaction is also that he was relieved that he was not punished. Cos' I called out to him to tell him our little secret when he alighted from the school bus and asked him to go to the nursery room where I was on duty. He thought I was going to punish him cos' he is not supposed to be in the nursery room.

Staying true to his word, he did not tell any of the children.

But he told Eileen instead.

So excited, that little boy. Can't contain his excitement, but still kept to his promise. :)

P/S: Gave up uploading the birthday photos. So few yet take so long.

Updates

2009-09-14T21:58:00.003+08:00

[ School starts again ]

Hi hi.

So long haven't blogged. I was thinking of uploading photos taken on my birthday.

But old laggy laptop of mine, though still working, has very sloooooooooooooow uploading speed. So slow that I don't feel like uploading anymore. I shall upload next time when I have more patience or not using my laggy-but-still-working laptop.

School just started again today. Last week was my September one week holiday. It wasn't very exciting...nothing much happened.

But I am sure glad the K2 camp is over. Next year would be my turn.

Boss is scary. Someone is to go end of this year. Once she dislikes you for something, she is going to mark you down forever.

AND she has high expectations for her subordinates. So if next year I did not do a good job, sayonara to me. AND somehow I always feel she doesn't like me much. There is always something that she has to say about me, or something that she is unhappy with me.

AND I don't know how to communicate with her. You know how some people can talk about lots of things with their boss? I can't. Unless she talks to me. Sounds like I am the boss huh?

Spent the whole week either "nua~ing" at home, or meet up with Faith. Cos' she is the one that is free during holidays too.

Term 4 is going to be a crazy term. I already felt the craziness. Today is the first day back at work and I don't even have the time to sit down and eat my breakfast. Did not manage to print out my lesson plan on time so boss looks black face even though she did not say anything. My fault. This friday have to remember to finish my lesson plan for next week and print it out.

Everyone is scared of Boss at the work place. Even the most rebellious....but she is still very brave I dare say. To still take MCs...when we all know how much Boss hates it. Unless yours is like really sick and once in a while...

After all, our working hours are so short. Boss doesn't want us to tire the other colleagues out. Moreover I have selfless colleagues who comes to work even when they are very sick with fever/kidney stones etc...

I have to keep myself healthy cos my dear Eileen is pregnant. Happy for her:) But now I also got to be extra careful with my health cos' even though I haven't taken MC for like a year, *touch wood*, I hope it will continue this way cos' if I am sick then Eileen how??

Talking about Eileen, she is really someone that is God sent. I was praying very hard for good colleagues with not much political backstabbing or calculativeness going on before I came here cos' I experienced some back at my previous work place (like I mentioned before if I like that kind of challenges I won't be in this line), and there I met Eileen on the first day.

She was soooooooooooooooooooooooo nice that I couldn't believe that such a person exist. She doesn't know what "calculative" means. Maybe that's why to me she looks like an angel. She doesn't even "calculate" when her husband was not nice to her. She doesn't calculate with what she and me have to do. She just did most of the work(stressful ones) and leave me easy(lesser somemore) work to do.

AND she NEVER complains that she does too much. Everyone does. It's not a bad thing, it's just a defence mechanism we have in each one of us to protect ourselves less someone take advantage of us. Almost every other colleagues in my work place will grumble if they do too many things.

And since I don't know what is going on, I just did what she told me to do. Then after sometime then I realise how come she did so much. Blur me right? That's me:X

I don't think she has ANY self-protection skills. Perhaps that's why I feel so protective towards her. And you don't think she is weak ok? She has extremely high threshold of pain. She can still smile when she has kidney stones. I think I would have fainted.

Now I try to do as much as possible too. That's why I am stressed about the board. I don't want her to do it! She does too much already.

If I ever leave this place one day, the person I will miss the most is her. Most definitely:)

Suddenly sound so emo:(

Tomorrow is my photo taking session! As if I am really excited...I got to wear something really bright cos' Boss says "no black and white".

Honestly........no comments.

The second holiday trip....

2009-07-15T22:13:00.011+08:00

[ Redang '09 ]

Yeah...

The second batch of photos....

Redang photos with dear!!

Heh:)

It was a nice and sweet trip. I mean, I got to spend time alone with dear, and it's not only fun, but really relaxing! We met some interesting people too:)

Well, our resort was the cheaper one, yet I preferred it more than the more expensive ones. Even though the other resorts(more expensive ones) have the nicer beach and water, it's sooooo crowded it feels like when I was suntanning at Sentosa.

In fact, it feels exactly like Sentosa. Except for the nice view(which is spoilt by too many people, inclusive of Ah muds and PRCs), many people are there playing beach volley ball game. It's impossible to relax at all. Every corner we turned, there were people.

AND all the resorts are so near to each other, and there was this one that blasted Malay songs out loud like how Cafe Delma at Sentosa does with the house music.

So even though the natural scenery was nicer, it's already spoilt by the amount of people there. Like completely covered with people. Anyone can hit you with a beach volley ball. How to relax?

But our resort is like a quiet, secluded and serene haven. There were no other resorts with us, so it feels like we are on something like a private island. It's really peaceful and quiet. NOBODY played beach volley ball (cos' our beach is not that huge), but it suited us fine cos' we wanted to swim at our beach.

Thank goodness dear chose the quiet and secluded one. Heard from dear that is the selling point of our resort anyway.

Anyway, the scenery is still nice, much better than Tioman, in my opinion. Cos' the water looked cleaner and nicer. More corals and fishes seen too.

The photos!

Dear at Yong Peng.

Dear's famous "you zai(translation: relaxing)" position

Our secluded, romantic and kampongish resort!

The sea view!

Dear and his love for coconut...

Forced to take a photo with his favourite fruit too!

To show his love for coconut....

He decided to plant it deep into the sand! (he and his crazy ideas again). According to the future Dr. Xue, the coconut will grow into a big tree in a few years time. So we have to go back and check next time.

The coconut (half buried in the sand)

Taking photos of our "smelly" feet!

Take 2!

Dear took a photo of me while waiting for lunch:)

Waiting for lunch! Look at the time and the time-table which shows what time the meals are served.

Us:)

Hot weather must eat ice-cream!

I find this photo hilarious. Doesn't he look like a small boy in that pose?

The place at the crowded resort...

Caught unawares! (so unglam!)

Surprise shot again!

Can't be bothered anymore.

Dear is unhappy.....not cos' his dinner was not served yet....

Poor boy's gotten sunburnt! (I didn't!Haha!) I blame it on the lousy and cheapo sunblock that he insisted on buying.

Photo taken on our way back.

Beautiful clear sea!

Up to his usual antics again...."Where is the bus?"

"I am here bus uncle!"

During our stop, we saw cows! Lots of them grazing at the grass!

Me!

Dear loves to read on loooong travelling trips...

He was once a fan of his....

We met some interesting friends during this trip as well! Dear er...affectionately nicknamed them the "Action packed".

Why is that so? Well, simply because...they are quite a happening bunch. Only two of them, yet they sounded like there were ten of them.

They loved to scream, squeal, yell, laugh, giggle, more squeals, screaming, giggling and yelling. At the very little things. Critics will call them "sua ku" (translation: country bumpkin). Kind people will call them enthusiastic girls who live life to the fullest.

Anyway, I felt that they are really nice, even though they get on my nerves sometimes, but they provided good entertainment for me n dear:) But since they have alot of my photos yet don't bother to pass to me no matter how many times I asked from them, I really feel like strangling them for putting me through all those torturous squeals and screams.

Partners in crime!

They are so passionate and enthusiastic about everything that they managed to find new friends at Redang. Like this Indian man who worked there.

On the whole, I really enjoyed the trip and really want to thank dear for bringing me there:) Dear promised me that we will go on couple trip like this once every year:) No matter how busy he is, since he just started his graduate school research:) Yay!

The first holiday trip

2009-07-12T17:33:00.007+08:00

[ Bangkok Trip '09 ]

Heh.

So long never blog...so I decided to put up the first batch of photos..Bangkok trip. I know it was from one month ago, but judging by the laptop speed of which i upload my photos, I have to take it one step at a time, cannot be too ambitious.

Bangkok trip was lots of FUN! We enjoyed all the street food and shopping and crapping. Heh:)

Anyway, random photos ahead! Not all the photos are uploaded though, just some of the ones that are funny or memorable.

At the budget terminal...signature universal hand sign:)

On the plane:)

On our way to shopping on the first day:)

The giant basket..."dustbin"

Giant "alien"?

Thai massage take 1.

Massage take 2!

The pointing-to-the-air-at-all-direction dance(invented by dear)in the lift cos' of the camera. Dear ALWAYS do that in the lift. So much so that he was the last one out of the lift. He looked hilarious doing that, and only he can dance that dance best.

Shopping!!!

Hungry after shopping...so we ate at the A&W cos' we miss it!!

Dear saying that sony camera sucks!

I was super pissed cos' I was the one who bought it!

Even though he explained that it's not cos' I bought it that he condemned the camera but cos' his really sucks, I was still unhappy. Cos' he has been saying it for soooooooooooooooooooooo many times.

Resting for awhile before heading off for more shopping.

Dinner at the street!!! Great food, much better than food courts anyway, and so CHEAP!!

Shopping!!!

Guess who I saw????? My favorite pirate Captain Jack Sparrow!! But I still prefer my Johnny Depp...heh.

Leg hurts from all the shopping...somehow I pulled my nerve on the feet I think.

On the cab to Chinatown!

Eat their cheap and good bird's nest:)

While waiting for the cab....camwhoring!

Want to smack him for always making me angry!

Still waiting for the stupid cab...in the end the stupid driver stood us up!

Last day...at the hotel lobby while checking out...

On the plane camwhoring again...cos' we're all wearing Adidas! The real and the fake one, can't tell the difference right? It was a cheap and good deal!

The person behind us has BAD smelly feet. Real serious case cos' everyone smelt it and even people from two rows down smelt it. It was THAT bad.

That's about all:) I hope we can go on holidays together again! So much fun:)

June Holidays is coming once again!!

2009-05-25T18:58:00.004+08:00

[ Holiday plans ]

Once again, my June holidays is coming.

This time, it seems that I will be really busy going abroad.

The funny thing was, when I really wanted to go overseas, it's either NOBODY wants to go with me, or I am BROKE or BOTH reasons.

This holiday, it seems, I've got people who are willingly sponsoring me to go overseas, AND wanting to go with me.

Let me tell you my schedule for June:

4th to 7th June(Thurs to Sunday): Bangkok trip with dear and Jesse and gang! (This one not counted, as I already planned to go since last December).

9th to 13th June(Tue to Sat): China trip, Shanghai and Guangzhou with MOM. (Yes, my mom, no less. Sponsored and paid for. Just need to bring myself there. She is there for her beauty products thing, which she usually doesn't bring me along, now she wants me to go.)

15th to 18th(hopefully) June (Mon to Thurs): KL trip with colleagues and principal. Again, sponsored. Why did I say "hopefully"? Cos' it's actually from 15th to 20th June, Monday to Saturday, OK! I mean, I know it's also a church camp, but so many days for what??? KL is not exactly known to be exciting!

22nd to 25th June (Mon to Thurs): Trip to Redang with dear!!! Yay!! Haha...he planned it and I didnt know when we are going or where...so it was quite a surprise:)

So you see? Busy or not? Somehow my mom and my boss also quite coincidental, die die also must THIS June holiday then ask me to go on trip. Sighz. I hope they ask me again during holidays when I am rotting at home...

Lastly, hope I won't fall sick!!! It's such a hot weather, AND all the places I am going is HOT too!!!

Happily ever after? or Happily never after?

2009-04-21T22:37:00.003+08:00

[ Marriage ]

Happily ever after? or happily never after?

As I am approaching my mid-twenties, friends around me are settling down one by one.

I used to want to get married. Fantasizes about finding my own happily-ever-after with my handsome prince.

So when I met dear, ten years ago, I already told myself he is the one.

I guess all along in the past I was alone. Most of the time. My parents neglected me, even they also admitted it, at the time when I need people around me the most.

Throughout my whole primary school and the first 2 years of my secondary school days...I was mostly on my own. My parents rarely have the time to speak to me...and my brother was too young to listen to my woes. He is six years younger than me.

Even though I have friends, I can't spend much time with them cos' ironically, my parents wanted me to go home straight after school. So with no family, no friends to talk to at home, you can say I was pretty much alone all the time.

And in Secondary school, making friends was hard for me cos' being alone too much made me quite socially impaired. Put that together with my bucked teeth, short boyish haircut, and a hot temper, you could say I was a social reject.

Perhaps I was alone too much, I wish someone would be there for me. Craving for love and attention, I wanted to find my handsome prince. He came along at the time when I wanted love and attention. So naturally, I was not only flattered, but immediately knew he would be the one whom I wanted to spend my whole life with. The guy that I want to marry.

And don't think that just because I was left alone too much, I would anyhow just accept a guy and want to marry him just because he gave me love. I also felt that he was a very good guy simply because he looked past my ugly face at that time, when most of the people in my school jeered or laughed at my bucked teeth.

That was then. My childish concept of love and marriage.

I am not saying my dear is bad. It's just that my whole concept and outlook of marriage have changed.

Perhaps it's cos' of how my dad is very loving and caring towards me now, or perhaps it's the divorces that I have seen...

Or simply because of my own parents' marriage. Ten years ago, when marriage was something that will not possibly happen but ten years later, I didn't really think about the issue on marriage clearly and carefully. I was so focused on not being alone anymore and craving for love.

Ten years later, when I feel the love from my parents (especially my dad), divorce cases around me and the topic of marriage which is not so far away now, I change.

I have such a bleak view on marriage. And add that on with the encouragement from my parents to not marry young and if I-didn't-find-the-right-one-don't-marry-ok-cos'-they-won't-mind, and my dad making me promise that if I marry I have to be in a blissful marriage if not he will not die happy and in peace, do you think I dare to commit without thinking through long and hard?

No freaking way.

So I am not sure whether I will marry dear. Not cos' I don't love him as much anymore, or he has been very bad to me.

I rather things stay the way they are now, meaning he is my boyfriend, with not much commitments, than get married and end up in a unhappy marriage.

I said this cos' I am not sure about us. I am not sure we can make things work. Cos' marriage is alot of hard work, communication, forgiveness, and compromises.

Which we are still working at now. So...yeah. I won't be getting married in the next 5-10 years. Unless of course within the time I became sure we can make things work.

Don't ask me why. My instincts tell me that we are not ready for marriage. AND I have come a long way and learn hard lessons on trusting my instincts, cos' my instincts were usually right, and I usually don't trust them. Learnt it the hard way when I didn't trust my instincts.

So happily ever after?

Not yet.

Tiredness within me..

2009-04-12T22:41:00.003+08:00

[ Sick of ]

I am sick of everything

Sick of you ignoring me
Sick of you calculating little things with me
Sick of you being so unforgiving

Sick of you saying you are not angry
when you show that you are
Sick of you blaming me
even when it is your fault

Sick of you saying sorry
when you are not sincere
Sick of you pushing me away
just because we quarrel

Sick of your attitude
when you are in the wrong
Sick of you thinking
you're never wrong

Sick of you blaming others
cos' they seem like they are helping me
Sick of you not REALLY accepting
me or anyone else's opinion when we quarrel

Sick of you saying you never say
yet you show what you never say
Sick of you looking at me cry
and look disgusted and angry that I cry

Sick of me saying sorry
and hear you say, "save it"
Sick of you being so unforgiving
and hard-hearted about it

Sick of you pushing me away
when I apologise
and you saying
how disappointed you are in me

Sick of you not telling me things
and expect me to understand them
Sick of you not accepting my faults
and being so hard about them

Sick of you saying
do whatever you want
In that uncaring attitude
Like you really do not care

Sick of me trying
to guess what you really are
to guess what you really feel
to guess that you don't mean it
to blame myself for everything

Sick of me trying
to undo my wrongs
to apologise because I feel so
to apologise cos' there is nothing else I can do to undo

Even though it might be a small wrong
Even though I am very sorry about it
Even though you don't even care for it

But it's not accepted
or it is enough

Cos as you put it
"Save it".

People who think they are good-looking when they are not

2009-04-07T22:29:00.003+08:00

[ One of the most disgusting people ]

Honestly.

It is bad and disgusting enough to have people who think they are hot stuff.

You know what's worse? THE people who think they are hot stuff when they're SO NOT.

These are possibly one of the most disgusting people in the world. Besides busy-bodies aka. gossips, hypocrites, backstabbers, show-offs...you get the point.

This disgusting class of snobs, which in my opinion, are more disgusting than rich snobs. I mean, at least, they DO have something to show-off. Don't get me wrong, they are all still disgusting in general.

Imagine. Someone fugly strutting around like he or she is the most good-looking thing in the world and putting other people down. OR someone plain like me strutting around like I am SO HOT and desirable cos' I keep laughing at everyone else around me except myself.

I personally encountered this kind of fugly show-offs before. She calls herself "the lady that sparkles" while laughing at other people. Purposely picking out people and laughing at them. Mind you, she is not laughing at some weird show-offs that I like to do, but just some random normal-looking poor fellow.

It's not as if she is Miss Universe or whatever. She is plain and ordinary and loves to act sweet and gentle when she is NOT. Disgusting.

Another one I encountered is the kind that is really ugly, in alot of people's opinion, yet still want to call other people UGLY and tease them.

All these people I mentioned were from my secondary school. Obviously they don't know the true invention of mirrors, to reflect and take a GOOD LOOK at themselves before criticising other people's looks, especially when these other people did not do anything to provoke them neither did they show-off in any way, like the way they do.

Gosh. I knew all the weird people in my secondary school. No wonder I don't like my secondary school much. They are not innocent like some other secondary school students I know of, and they are bend on destroying other people's self-confidence.

You will think some people will grow up, don't you? But no. Some people still call herself "sparkling lady", thinks she dresses well AND loves to gossip. SO cool.

YUCK.

P/S: Really can't stand her attitude. Must vent it out here.

I miss Sethie today.

2009-04-06T23:24:00.003+08:00

[ Serious problem ]

Me(while blowing my nose): Seth! I am feeling very sick!! I've been sick for a loooooooong time.
Seth(frowning and looking very concerned): I think you have a very serious problem, Miss Kho.
Me(pretending to be worried): OH really??
Seth(eyes grew bigger than usual): Yes, Miss Kho. It's a serious problem and I think you should see the doctor.
Me(pretending to be worried, trying to hide my smile): But I am afraid of doctors.
Seth(seriously giving his speech): Yeah, doctors are not scary. Dentists are scary.
Me: (burst into laughter and hugged him)

P/S: Seth is not here today and I miss him. Heard from the bus uncle that he is sick. Which reminds me of this conversation. Hope he recovers soon!!! I MISS HIM!!! NOBODY TO DISTURB SO I AM SO BORED IN SCHOOL!!! Haha.

AND Seth speaks good English. Without any of the Singlish nonsense, but with a heavy philippino accent at times! Very cute.

Another cute remark..

2009-03-30T19:55:00.002+08:00

[ California trip ]

(During January, during toilet-break)
Seth(with his heavy philippino accent): Miss Kho, can I bring you to California?
Me: Why?
Seth: Because I want to bring you and show mommy.
Me(amused): Ok sure.
Seth(looking and sounding very serious and concerned): Do you have a passport?
Me(very amused): Yes.
Seth: Do you have a luggage?
Me(very entertained and was suppressing my laughter, trying to look as serious as he is): Yes.
Seth: Ok. Then I can bring you to California, ok?
Me: How do you bring me to California?
Seth: You take aeroplane with me and daddy. I will ask daddy ok?
Me(laughing by this time): Ok.

(Today, on the school bus)
Me(disturbing Seth mood): Seth, I thought you say you want to bring me to California?
Seth(looking sad): I cannot bring you there Miss Kho.
Me: Why?
Seth: Cos' only daddy can bring you there.
Me: But I thought you say you want to ask daddy about it?
Seth(looking very sad): Oh. Daddy says cannot.
Me: Oh ok. Then I don't go with you.
Seth (going out of point): But daddy has two luggages. Do you have a luggage?
Me(confused): I do. I have one luggage. I told you that before.
Seth: Yeah! I think you can go to California with me and daddy. Daddy has to buy the tickets.
Me(totally lost): So am I going with you or what?
Seth: Yeah, daddy will buy tickets. (smiles happily at me)

P/S: I am too lazy to put up photos anyway. My laptop is soooooooooo slow and laggy when it comes to uploading photos. GAH! Next time ba.

Sick again and again

2009-03-17T14:04:00.003+08:00

[ Sick of being sick ]

Yeah. I am sick. AGAIN.

AND it's supposed to be my break, cos' it's THE one week March holidays.

It was such a vicious cycle. I was the one that is sick first, cos' I got it from my brother.

Then after that, I think I spreaded it to dear. Somehow, after I was well for awhile, dear got sick, and after that, it came back to me.

So much for not relying on anti-biotics.

Anyway, just some random updates on the events. I've gotten my very beautiful looking pink external hard disk from the IT fair. Thanks to Qi. AND it's so chio. That's the word for it. It even won some design award cos' of it's pretty design. It costs about $129 for a 320Gb hard disk.

Qi says more important is the functions inside, not the outlook. So she says it's not worth it cos' there are others around that is cheaper, for a 320Gb hard disk. I think the cheapest one is $99.

But I am sorry lor, I don't want the cheap one cos' to me, it's looks ugly. It's black, (and don't get the wrong idea, I don't hate black, I love black too) but it's the kind of ugly, plastic~ky, cheapo black. Which I don't like. If it's the glossy, elegant, porsche black, I won't have minded.

I mean, after all, I have to face that external hard disk for a looooooong time. If it's so ugly, I won't even want to look at it. And I am sure if I bought the black cheap one, every time I look at it I will think about the nice pink one. So I am so happy to own my pink cute one. Haha. I am SO vain.

It's owned by a German company called Freecom, though it's made in China. But a quick google search makes me realise that Freecom is not as unheard of as I thought, cos' that was my main worry at first.

AND mine is known as Freecom Tough drive pink. Cos' it's shock resistant too! So don't think it's pink means it's bimbotic ok? I didn't mind paying more not only cos' of its looks, but its shocki resistant. God knows I have a fettish for things shock-resistant (like Baby G). (It's cos' of my occupation, when dealing with children, it's best to own TOUGH things.) So when tough+good-looking comes together = Joyce's favourite thing. Haha.

Here is a picture:

Not very clear....

Much better. AND the cable is attached to it so I won't need to carry extra cable around, unlike other external hard disks. For it's toughness, design and cable-attached, I don't mind paying extra:)

AND we met this stupid salesgirl (who's selling the cheapo $99 black 320Gb hard disk). She is really stupid I tell you. So dumb that she pissed me and Qi off.

We saw this company's( I can't remember the name) external hard disk, and asked her which country it is from, not which country it is made, just to gauge whether it's reliable. (Like mine is from Germany, even though it is made in China, so even though we never heard of Freecom, we are still more or less assured of its quality)

Then that dumbo(bimbo+dumb= more dumb than a bimbo) told us that it's made in China, which we could see(we're not dumb like her), since every piece of hard disk there(even mine) has a big MADE IN CHINA at the back. (I mean seriously, alot of the big names assemble their pieces in China nowadays, like Sony etc.)

So Qi patiently rephrased and asked her question again.

That dumbo, replied, "I don't know! Some parts of the hard disk can be from Thailand, some parts from China, if you really want to know, I can show you the different parts lor!"

How dumb!

By this time, even I was pissed off at her apparent idiocy. I told her, "What my friend meant is which country the company that made it is from, you know where it originates from. Like Samsung is from Korea."

After listening to my super obvious explanation, do you know what the dumbo said?

Dumbo said: "I don't know la! Samsung is no longer from Korea what! It's now in Japan!"

Wow. What a smart dumbo! Firstly, I didn't know companies can be so dumb to move from Korea(of a lower cost) to Japan(of a higher cost) AND secondly, I didn't know some company from Japan bought over Samsung! Which company is that, I wonder...hmm? Toshiba or Fujitsu?

AND lastly, which part of originate from you don't understand dumbo? I don't even think spelling the word O-R-I-G-I-N-A-T-E will help her to understand our question.

Thanks for that piece of information dumbo. I assume she must be right. After all, she is working at IT fair you know! How can we second guess her?

Anyway, enough of that dumbo.

Dear told me that he will be even more busy once he starts his PhD. I am glad he was awarded the scholarship, since the economy is bad now and it's difficult to find a job.

But the thing is, he is already quite stressed now, even though he is still doing his honors year. He hasn't even started his post grad studies, and he already is so stressed and so many things to do.

So I am quite worried about him. AND I have to remind myself not to complain about him not being able to meet me as often, especially when his PhD starts. Cos' I think he has enough stress and doesn't need me to add on his stress.

I think I am worried cos' this is the first time I see him so stressed out. As in usually when he is under stress he won't mention it to anybody. He will just brush it off and when people asked him he will say, "it's ok la" that kind of thing.

Now, he is telling people he has no life etc. Must be hard on him. Hmm. I wonder besides being supportive and understanding what else I can do. Any suggestions, people??

That's about all for today's entry.

P/S: Oh! I am so happy. I am going to learn scrap booking tomorrow!!! Yay! Thanks to my colleague, Melissa. She can be very nice when it comes to scrap booking.

AND next entry I will be posting photos taken from Chiang Mai Palace which we feasted at last Saturday!

Children are the light in the darkness

2009-03-11T21:25:00.010+08:00

[ Because I love you ]

I know teachers are not supposed to have favourites. I try not to show favouritism in my class, but it's hard for me not to have favourites.

Especially if you have those children who know how to make you smile, and you know they mean it.

That's one of the main reason why I want to stay as a preschool teacher. Generally, preschool children are not the monsters or irritants alot of people think they are. Those irritants are from an older age group.

But then again, maybe I am lucky. Cos' I somehow seemed to get children that do not have much behavioural or discipline problems. But I don't know how long this will last, cos' I heard I've got this horrible new kid coming in that is a spoilt brat.

Anyway, I have sidetracked. Today, class was enjoyable. And of cos', it is thanks to one of my favourite boy, Seth.

Seth is a cute chubby bubbly boy who speaks with a philippino accent. He is very active, and loves to speak his mind, which sometimes doesn't make any sense. I dote on him alot, cos' he is just like a baby at times, yet I scold him quite often too cos' he can forget himself and misbehave by talking loudly and shoving other children (but he seemed better behaved since this year).

He is also very affectionate, perhaps only to me( I don't know, other teachers who find him cute wants to hug him but he refused complained that to me).

Cos' he is cute and loves to speak his mind, I love to disturb him.

So today, as usual, I did.

Seth loves to hug me suddenly and I always return his hug. But today, I decided to tease him a little.

(In the classroom, during lesson time)

Seth: Miss Kho! (tried to hug me)
Me: Seth, I don't want your hug today. (by now the other children were paying attention to our conversation)
Seth: Why, Miss Kho? (Eyes grew wide, looking teary)
Me: Because I don't know why you want to hug me.
Seth: No, Miss Kho. Kiss is very very dirty. Got saliva, then can make me sick. (He loves to talk out of point)
Me: No, Seth. I ask you why you want to hug me(rephrased my question, seeing how he talks out of point).
Seth: (creeps very close to me, both hands cupping around my right ear, and whispers like he is sharing a secret that he doesn't want other children to hear) Because I love you Miss Kho.

AWW!!!! Was how I felt, but my first reaction was laughing out so loudly that other children were laughing with me. Christy, one of my favourite girls in the class who is very mature, remarked, "Seth is so cute."

I laughed because that was unexpected, especially when he leaned so close and cupped my right ear with his hands, I was wondering he must have some secret to tell me.

Somehow, it reminds me to the cheesy water chestnut advertisement too.

Anyway, Seth laughed with me. He has no idea what's so funny. Poor boy. But of course I told him I love him too.

Even though they had no idea what Seth said that made me laugh, but they all felt he was cute. Somehow.

A few photos of my beloved Seth:

That's me and cute Seth:)

P/S: He's so attached to me probably also cos' he doesn't have his mother by his side. But he's got a loving and doting dad.

Gossips

2009-03-07T01:15:00.003+08:00

[Two kinds of gossips that I hate]

What is the definition of gossips? Why do people like gossips?

I generally dislike two kinds of gossips. I mean, I am not being a saint here. I gossiped too, at times.

But usually I only gossip about people whom I am not close to, AND I would not purposely find out gossips about these people just so that I can gossip about it to my friend. AND usually our gossip do not degrade others(meaning laugh at others). Usually.

Of course, I admit, I did it before. Long time ago. Till I experienced this kind of gossip against me, I realised how hurtful it is.

So generally, I hate two kinds of gossips. One, is the kind of people that purposely go around and ask about this person, trying to act very concern, but in actual fact she/he just wants to satisfy her/his gossiping needs and tell it to her/his friends cos' she/he has nothing better to do AND cos' she/he enjoys laughing at other people's problems/misery etc.

Second, is the kind of people that gossips about her/his close friends. Those close enough to be trusted and rely on. AND not only does she/he gossip, she or he does not mean well, but just doing it cos' she/he enjoys the gossip.

A classic example. Her. His ex.

Purposely asking him questions, that did not really concern her.

Seriously, I didn't even really purposely ask around things concerning her, so why did she have to do that?

But of course, she is THE gossip that I hate. The kind like those aunties who had nothing better to do AND so asked questions and die die also must find out what happened even though they were not close to the person, and just so as to gossip with her mates lah! What else?

AND the worse part is, her intention to gossip is to degrade and laugh at me! Imagine you're hurt like mad and someone gossip about you, by laughing at you! How cool is that?

Maybe one day I might be like that, when I become a forty-going-on-fifty auntie.

The second kind that I hate, is those who are close to you, yet gossip about you, but from their tone and what they said you know they did not sound really well meaning. Just say it for the sake of saying it, just so all of them could say, "Aiyoh, why she like that?"

If it's really well-meaning, I prefer true friends who tell it in my face if they really feel there is something wrong with me, like what Faith or Qi did, rather than avoid telling me.

I know they might not want to tell me cos' they might be afraid that I will not speak to them, or angry, or hurt or etc.

For the reason on hurt, maybe I can accept. But the rest of the reasons are bullshit. If you are so nice to me, and that you are supposedly one of my close friends, whom I tell my secrets to, you should know me well enough to know that I-WILL-NOT-BE-ANGRY-WHEN-YOU-TELL-ME-WHAT-MY-PROBLEM-IS.

I am talking about those people who are close to me. Whom I told before that I won't be angry or upset over whatever bad things you have to say about me. I might be hurt, yes, but not angry. Cos' I rather you tell me than talk behind my back. And not in a very nice way.

It's not the first time she did it. But I don't really want to say who it is, cos' she is someone quite close to me.

Whatever la ok? I can't be bothered anymore.

Not in the mood to blog...

2009-03-04T21:08:00.025+08:00

[Photos taken on V'day]

Since I am sick but bored to death and in such a foul mood...I decided just to post photos. I am sick of my laptop as well. It's so slow, I gave up on uploading photos on photobucket.

Anyway, today I will just be uploading photos of my Valentine's Day, when we went Pump room.

I've been clubbing quite alot recently, I wonder why. Just last week alone, I went to Zouk on Friday, and Dbl O on Saturday. Dbl O's door bitch sucks big time (I refused to call her a door hostess), cos' she was such a bitch that I quarreled with her. But in the end I decided not to let a door bitch(she's JUST a door bitch, not some big shot) spoil my night. Everyone else(dear, his sis, Qi, Amy and Fion)was very nice to cheer me up too.

On the whole, both nights were FUN!!!

Well, the photos from Dbl O and Zouk gotta wait cos' I haven't got the pictures from Qi, cos' she just went through an operation and I didnt want to disturb her.

So photos of Valentine's Day!!

This year's Valentine's Day was fun, even though it's the first time I didn't celebrate it alone with dear. We went to Pump room and took loads of photos!

We even met a stupid lau char bor who thinks she is so gorgeous cos' she couldn't even differentiate molest from accidentally touch!! Imagine she accused my dear molested her!!! Goodness, she is like an ugly pug who is old enough to be my aunt, saying my dear touched her!

My dear, who is good-looking, a future PhD holder, who can have any girl he wants from NUS, who are much more prettier and younger, touching HER??? Gosh, it's such a joke that I have to post it here to tell you guys.

AND the best part is that I was there, if he was so high and wanted to touch some girl, he could always touch me!! If you say, "Maybe she's got a hot figure leh?"

HOT my FOOT ah!!! That night, there was me, my bestie Qi, Jeanne, dear's sister Jesse and Fion. All and each one of us are HOTTER than her, in terms of LOOKS and FIGURE ok??? EVEN if you look at us from the BACK, we're still HOTTER!!!

Picture this ok? Curly ah ma hairstyle, flat boobs, flat butt, ugly floral RED/PINK dress that was KNEE length, saggy skin on the face, you tell me, PRETTY MEH??? HOT MEH????

SO even if I am not pretty or hot enough for my dear, our group have other PRETTY and HOT girls too what!!! So much younger and have better figure and skin and dress sense, WHY should he pick that OLD PUG to molest?

For goodness sake, it's so disgustingly funny.

Anyway, enough about that.

Photos!!!

Valentine's Day present:

Flowers!! A bouquet of towel folded flowers:) Dear doesn't like giving me real flowers cos' he feels I can't keep it for long! So this bouquet is my favourite:) cos' it looks so pretty, and real:) AND I can keep it for as long as I want in the same condition:)

Bag!! Inside the bag dear gave me a surprise by putting a fake bread from Action City that looked and even smell exactly like a real bread! Dear even put it in breadtalk plastic bag.

Pardon me for putting the same photos of the same bouquet of flowers but I just couldn't find the right angle!

My V'day puzzle message for dear:

Photos at Brotzeit with Qi before I met dear and gang:

Flowers given by Nazir from Brotzeit:)

Photos from Pump Room:
~Me and Dear~

"Michael Phelps replay"

Taken from our backs....

The last picture of me and dear....and my most favourite of all....

~Me & Qi~

My last and favourite picture of me and Qi

~Me and dear's sis Jesse and Fion~

The cocktail gang:)

Me and Jesse:)

~Chosen a few funny photos~(I didnt put up all the funny photos we took cos' I am afraid Jesse and Fion might mind, so I chose those few photos of my ugly face instead)

~Other random photos~

Like sister, like brother, eh?

I have absolutely no idea what this means?

The best dancer of the night: Keng Soon!!

The three guys from "China"

Us babes! Hmm...where is Jesse?

Ah!! All of the babes, Take 1! :)

The pretty babes again, Take 2!

Kevin looooooooooves the tower!!

The shattered glass! What a strong "cheers" by Keng Soon.

The infamous Hide-Behind-The-Tower-And-Take-My-Photo stunt. Heh:)

Applause and a rose for the Dancing King!!

Puppet dancer(me) with an "extra hand"

And finally....the whole gang:

That's about all for this super-long-with-photos entry:)

LG mobile sucks!! Plans for the new year

2009-01-25T19:08:00.006+08:00

[ Good and bad things that happened ]

Gosh. Chinese New Year is around the corner again.

Anyway, after my last entry, quite a few things happened.

So let me begin with the worst and make-me-so-pissed-off event that dragged till yesterday.

Well, I bought a new handphone last December! It was pretty, cute, and pink. Most importantly, it's a simple clamshell handphone with none of those tech savvy functions (actually, I wanted the Samsung Omnia cos' it has WiFi, but it's so expensive I decided to let it go and go for looks instead cos' it's more budget friendly).

WRONG CHOICE. I was soooooooooooooooo bloody happy when I got the handphone ok? Even though it didnt have the WiFi, it's still pretty and cheap and you can even customize the external screen by putting your own name! WOW right???

WRONG AGAIN! It's the worst phone I've ever had. DO YOU GUYS WANT TO KNOW WHAT PHONE IS IT???

IT even has a cute name. It's LG ice-cream phone: KF350.

It's the WORST phone I have ever had.

Can you imagine, having a phone that cant even make a call?? That's how bad it is. Upon the SECOND day of owning it, the stupid LG handphone just automatically switched off, BY ITSELF. Imagine my shock when I first encountered it. I innocently took it out from my bag, wanting to sms my dear and realised it was OFF.

Cos' I love it sooooooooo much, I convinced myself I actually switched it off. Which is quite ridiculous cos I never switch off my handphone for no reason.

Then, I had to take out the battery and put it back again in order to switch it on (somehow it can't be switched on by just pressing the on button).

I was at Cameron Highlands at that point of time. Since then, without warning, my LG handphone had been playing "auto-off" game with me. It can be working fine one minute and then after that suddenly switched off the next time I took it out from the bag.

This is not the best part.

Then, after so many times of "auto-off" situation, I decided upon reaching Singapore, to send it for repair.

This is where the frustration starts. You have to understand that actually, I love the phone so much that I was willing to do ANYTHING for it, as long as I can use it.

I went down to LG service centre at Vivo. The person told me that this model has a software problem, so he would update my software for me, there shouldn't be anymore problems.

I waited for one hour, which at that point of time I gladly didn't mind, since I love the phone that much. I even went on shopping.

After I collected my handphone, I went home, AND this is where the whole ordeal starts.

I CANT EVEN MAKE A CALL. Do you know why??? Cos' THE BLOODY LG ICE CREAM HANDPHONE STILL HAS THE SAME PROBLEM!!! YES, the auto-power off problem!!! Only this time, it was worse. Instead of ONLY giving me surprise by powering off when it was peacefully sitting in my bag, it also SUDDENLY POWER-OFF WHEN I WAS CHATTING ON THE PHONE HALFWAY!!!!

I tell you, my dear was like, "Eh, your handphone damn lousy" and he didnt mean my old nokia handphone. And my brother was like, "LG=Low Grade. Not Life's Good".

Even so I was still very patient, I sent it for repair again. This time, the service centre said they had to take in my handset.

DO YOU KNOW WHATS THE BEST PART IS????

To cut the long story short(believe me, I repeated the ordeal so many times and that's why I am so PISSED), even after repairing A FEW TIMES, the handphone STILL HAS THE SAME PROBLEM.

And not only the phone sucks, THE TECHNICIAN AND SERVICE CENTRE SUCKS BIG TIME TOO. WHY?????

Cos' the reasons are below:
1. Poor attitude: The stupid stupid fucker who served me had the cheek to say that it was probably me who accidentally press the cancel call button that's why it powered off. The stupid fucker simply could not believe that after they took in the handset and changed the motherboard for me, IT STILL AUTO-POWER OFF, SAME FUCKING PROBLEM! I had to shoot him off by saying that THE STUPID PHONE SIMPLY DIED ON ME!!!

2. Lousy and/or lazy technician: Upon shooting the stupid fucker off, he took in the handphone, and within 3 days, called me again to collect the phone. This time I was smart, I called my friend on the spot USING THAT LOUSY PHONE.

Guess what??? It still has the SAME PROBLEM! The best part is, this time this other service person(not that previous fucker), talked to the technician or something, AND THEY TOLD ME THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO WITH IT!!! you know what they said????? They said, "We really don't know what else to do with your handphone, cos' we changed the mother board AND the battery, this handset is AS GOOD AS NEW!"

Let me ask you guys something. If it is YOU who owned the cursed handphone, you hear this kind of thing, won't you think the exact same thing that I did, which is, "YOU MEAN LG CANNOT FIX LG PHONE??? SHOULD I SEND IT TO NOKIA OR SAMSUNG??? AND WHEN A PHONE CAN'T FUNCTION IT IS ONLY COS' OF BATTERY AND MOTHERBOARD, NOTHING ELSE MEH????" Those were my thoughts. I was fuming mad.

Seriously!! I am not a technician, but even I, and my other friends, agreed that there were more things to a handphone than A MOTHERBOARD AND BATTERY!!!They not only didn't bother to think of other ways to fix my phone, they didn't even offer a one to one exchange!!!

AND they took more than a week to change a motherboard. More than 3 days to decide that since they already changed the mother board and it still has the same problem, let's just give a new battery, and it's "as good as new". WOW.

3. "Brilliant" LG service: Cos' I was fuming mad and demanded that I want to lodge a complain, since they didn't even offer one-for-one exchange, they decided to help me by asking the HQ WHETHER THEY CAN GIVE ME A ONE FOR ONE EXCHANGE.

Seriously. The phone spoil till they couldn't fix, AND IT WAS NEW, and they didn't even do anything about it. I heard so many people tell me how Sony Ericsson will change it without you asking for it if the problem is really as bad as this.

AND you know what??? Their one for one exchange right? IT'S A BLOODY JOKE. They only give you a new phone, and THE BOX. YES, I am not joking. They passed me back my charger, warranty everything else "cos' I used before"(quoted from them), and literally only my phone is the new set, and the box. Suqi was with me and we quarreled with the service people again, cos' they refused to give me a warranty card that has the serial number of the new phone!!! They passed me back my previous warranty, and it consisted of my old serial number!

SOME KIND OF EXCHANGE! BRILLIANT SERVICE LG!

And you know what? I bought my handset on 23rd December, it started to power off on 25th December, and about almost a month later, which was yesterday, 24th January, then they called me down to the so called "one for one exchange".

I don't call that one for one exchange. I called that "miser exchange".

AND I went without my new phone for almost a month, still having to use my trustworthy Nokia phone.

I was so willing to give them a chance, judging by how many times I had gone down there, and still like that. I decided enough was enough, AND I SWEAR I WILL NEVER EVER BUY LG MOBILE ANYMORE. This was my first time and it ended up like this, THIS WILL BE MY FIRST AND LAST TRY AT LG. (I will chop off my hands if I ever buy LG phones again!)

And the joke is that this ice-cream phone is not even touch screen, or any kind of high functioning phone. It was just a simple, lousy clamshell phone with no special functions except for the personalizing of external screen.

OH GOSH! I am so glad I got rid of the horrible phone!! I quickly got rid of it yesterday AND some unfortunate person might have to go through the same ordeal as me! (Suqi said that that phone is really lousy, don't know why I buy it, cos' when she switched it on for me, it takes a looooooooooooonnnnnnng time to be switched on. And the LG people say it takes quite a while to switch on. Which really shows how "good" the stability of the phone is.)

If you are thinking of buying LG, please think twice. It's not only about the lousy quality of the phone, but of the WHOLE LG MOBILE COMPANY. Service centre as well as technician.

I have a new and so far, going into it's third day, cool and working! Touch screen somemore! Pink too!! Yay!!!

NOT LG VIEWTY IDIOTS!! I won't buy LG FOR AS LONG AS I LIVE.

That's all about the event that pissed me off so badly.

****************************************

Well, I am one happy and loved Daddy's girl. Just this week, on Tuesday or Wednesday, which was a few days ago, he said he would sponsor me for my Masters!!!

I wanted to do my Masters, but at that point of time last year I was slacking, and this year, it seemed that nobody wanted to sponsor me first. I don't earn much and I pay for ALL my own expenses, not like a friend I know, and I have miserable pay.

Classes will commence on March. So this year, I will be very busy again, cos' I will be doing my Masters.

And it's a good news to kickstart my new year.

And also the most coincidental thing is that, dear also might be doing his PhD. I know Masters and PhD is different, but still, they are better than bachelors. My goal will be to complete my Masters and find a job at International schools. Cos' they pay well!

Anyway, this year's Chinese New Year isn't very exciting, though I had a really fun night yesterday at Pump Room with dear and suqi and kevin, I didn't know Pump Room is more like a club than Microbrewery, AND their band is DAMN GOOD! We danced and partied away like mad!! Well, more about that in the next entry, which I will put up funny photos of me and dear.

Was quite pissed off at him at times yesterday. But he always know how to make me stop feeling angry. Anyway, more about it next entry!

Gong xi fa cai! Have a Happy Lunar New Year!!!

Damn pissed....

2008-12-22T23:32:00.003+08:00

[ Plans postponed and dashed...for now ]

Yeah. This entry came abit too late huh? I actually had another entry, which is quite crappy but nonetheless gossipy, and girls will like it cos' it's hunks gallery, but due to my plans being postponed and dashed, I was in no mood to gush anymore....and since I feel much better about it now, might as well let you guys know what happened.

People who hate me are going to enjoy this...

Well, if you people read my previous entry, you would have learnt that this holiday I should be going overseas. To Thailand, and to Malaysia.

And due to the #$%#^@!^&* political situation in Thailand, I can't go. Or rather, dear's parents don't want us to go. I am not blaming them, you know. It was quite bad over there, with people stucked there due to the protests and all. So naturally, they were worried for us. Or that it would turn into a huge riot or something.

At that point of time, you couldn't imagine the roller coaster ride I went through. At first, when the airport was closed, I had to check the news everyday. My dad was so surprised to see me watching news every night, he thought I was planning a career switch or something, being so concerned about the political situation in Thailand and all.

I mean, I was really worried ok??? I really wanted to go, cos' if I don't, it's not only a HUGE disappointment, but think about the money that was lost!!!! (well, at that point of time, we thought if we didn't go, the hotel money will be gone, cos' they don't refund, even though the airline does).

Can you imagine a DOUBLE disappointment? Not getting to go on a trip but still paying for it? I was going beserk!

Then I was super happy seeing the airport reopened, thinking that I get to go! Feeling happy, I thought my problems ended....TILL his parents said we were not allowed to go. Don't get me wrong, I understand where his parents were coming from....but that didn't make me feel any less disappointed.

I can see people who hate me is going to enjoy this.

All these while when the Thais are protesting, I was also trying to console myself that at least, I get to go Johore trip with my colleagues and best friend, even though I might not get to go Thailand. (The Johore trip was just a few days before my Thai trip). Though I was really sore cos' I really want to go on a trip with dear...

AND...that was when I got the news that Johore trip is cancelled.

Yeah, people who hate me, you can laugh your ass off. I was beginning to think God hates me too, what with both trips getting cancelled on me.

So I decided I was in no mood to blog. Instead of blogging about my trips, I am complaining about them, and I didn't even get to go!

But luckily, the Cameron Highlands trip is still on. Though dear is not going to be around, it's still a trip to bond with my dad and bro. Any trip to relax is good, cos' school is reopening, and I am already feeling the stress, cos' my boss IS giving me alot of pressure to perform even better this year. She seemed to have high expectations of me.

Thinking about the new (but horrible) kids I met before the term ended this year during the parents meeting that just passed, add that with my boss's expectations, I need to recharge and relax ALOT.

Well, I have the mood to blog now, cos'(people who hate me is going to hate this), even though I didn't get to go Thailand trip this December... I didn't lose any money, AND I am still going to go Thailand with dear!

WE POSTPONED IT! Yes, budget airline usually don't allow postponing for FREE, even though hotels do. At least ours did. But because it is an exceptional case, with the protests and all, Tiger airways allow postponing our trip, for FREE!!

Well, actually, it wasn't easy to change dates for FREE though. Not with Tiger airways. Somehow, you have to personally call them up to get it done free. If not, they will charge you with an admin fee of $200.

THAT'S horrendous ok! I even asked dear to tell them why not let ME do the admin work for them, and hence, waived off the charges. I mean, how difficult can it be, what with the advanced technology and computerised stuff and all. I was very sure it will just take them a few clicks on the mouse to get it done for us.

Well, after two looooooooooooong calls (waiting time: 50mins each, you do the math), dear and his dear sis got it postponed. YIPPEE!! (Mood swings high again!)

TAKE THAT! People who hate me!! Wahaha...I still get to go, and no money lost! (So god loves me after all, wahaha!) Well, I better not laugh yet. Who knows when the Thais might suddenly want to protest again? After all, they just changed a new prime minister, and I heard coups are very common in their country, so common that it is treated with a nonchalent attitude.

Whatever. As long as I get to go. I am that self-centered. HAHA.

Oh well. I am away during Christmas! Cameron trip so far is looking strong! So...I won't be blogging for the next few days I guess! I will be busy preparing things:)

OH! As for the hunky-dory hunks I mentioned, if you're a girl, and like me, you love to look at eye-candies, then you gotta wait for my next entry! HEH. (Hmm....I wonder if my next entry will end up being my previous entry? After all, I saved it under drafts since I blogged it earlier this mth....hmm.)

Maybe you guys have to see the previous entry for the hunks when I finally published it. Sounds confusing? I am confused too:)

Idol dramas...

2008-11-25T23:34:00.013+08:00

[ Taiwanese idol drama! ]

It's my holidays....as you people will know from my previous entry. Since I've got so much free time...I, of course, indulged myself into watching drama serials!

AND I realise I really prefer watching Taiwanese idol dramas to Korean or Japanese dramas!!!(Though I used to prefer Korean dramas)

"Why?" You asked.

The reason is SO simple and easy to understand.

Cos' Taiwanese idol dramas are usually filled with funny, exciting yet easy-to-understand-plot AND happy-endings!!

They are not as heart-wrenching, tears galore, as the Korean dramas! Well, at least most of the taiwanese idol dramas anyway.

AND they are not as cruel-to-characters and monotonous, like Japanese dramas!

Actually, in my opinion, BOTH Korean and Japanese dramas are quite monotonous at times.

I mean, I watched all these for entertainment, I rather have some fun and laughter with it, than crying my souls out.

Of course....in my opinion, another real reason is the eye candies from the dramas!!! I seriously feel that the Taiwanese actors are ALL SO CUTE!!! I mean, I feel that compared to Korean and Japanese, which SOME of them consist of lead actors that, in my opinion, look like someone's uncle(more often found in Korean idol dramas), or actors that look quite hideous (some Jap actors really also cannot make it).

But so far, the actors from Taiwanese idol dramas are so HOT!!! Especially the leading actors:)

Here are some pictures(the ones I like) for those of you who don't watch Taiwanese Idol dramas, you be the judge:

Name: Wu Chun. Acted in: "Tokyo Juliet", "Hana Kimi".

Name: Aaron Yan. Drama: "It started with a kiss 1 & 2", "X family".

Name: Baron Chen. Drama: "You are my destiny"

Name: Jiro Wang. Drama: "It started with a kiss 1 & 2", "Hana kimi", "X family".

Name: Ming Dao. Drama: "The prince who turns into a frog", "Ying Ye 3+1".

Name: Show Luo. Drama: "The corner with love", "Hi working girl".

Name: Danson Tang. Drama: "It started with a kiss 2", "Hana kimi".

Name: Mike He. Drama: "Devil by my side", "Why why love".

Name: Jerry Yan (He is the most famous one among all the actors). Drama: "Meteor Garden"

Name: Joe Cheng. Drama: "It started with a kiss 1 & 2"

Name: Kingone. Drama: "Devil by my side", "Why why love".

That's about all that I like. There are more actors that are also good-looking, but so far, these are the ones that caught my eye:)

It's so hard to choose a favourite among them, don't you think? But I have a favourite. In fact, two favourites.

One, in my opinion, is the best-looking actor in Taiwan. The one that really made me go ga-ga over. The other one, is the one that is the most talented. He is the one that made me wish he is my boyfriend, even though I already have one great boyfriend. So basically, there are actually two of them I like the most among them all.

GUESS who is my favourite BEST-LOOKING and MOST TALENTED?? (Clue: Both their pictures were shown above)

BEST LOOKING (In my opinion)

Mike He!!!! I don't know why, just find him particularly handsome. I "fell in love" the first time I saw him in Rainie Yang's MTV.

MOST TALENTED (In my opinion)

Show Luo Zhi Xiang!!! He can sing, dances very well, hosts well too (humorous), and can act!! Need I say more??

I really favourited this two. Heh.

Now, before you people think I am some crazy deprived woman who is utterly biased to say that Taiwanese idol drama because I say all credits to the actors.....WRONG!!!

I also feel that I love Taiwan idol dramas(must emphasized it is IDOL dramas, not their hokkien dramas) not only goes to the happy-ending-relaxing-funny-yet-can-make-you-cry-at-the-same-time plot, hunky-dory actors, the credits do go to their actresses!!

WHY, you ask???

No, not because they are sooooooooooooooooooo beautiful. Actually, it is precisely that their beauty is plain, ordinary, REAL and pleasant, and most importantly not intimidating! Cos their beauty makes me feel that I can relate to!

Even though they are still much more prettier than me, but they are not the kind of model-like gorgeous, but just the kind of girl-next-door prettiness(which some people find ugly) that makes you feel comfortable. You know, unlike some of the Korean actress who look too pretty to be true cos they look plastic, like barbie dolls.

I don't know if I make sense to you people. But whatever. Let's take a look at some of the actresses that I like, starting from my most favourite:)

Rainie Yang, together with Mike He, the best golden couple on screen:)

Joe Chen, looked best together with Ming Dao, another golden couple on screen:)

Barbie Hsu, looked best together with Show Luo on screen:)

Ariel Lin, looked best together with Joe Cheng on screen, another all time favourite golden couple. Apparently, even Joe Cheng's birth father thinks so too, and said to the media he accepts ONLY her as his daughter-in-law.

Ella (don't remember her surname). Looked best together with Wu Chun on screen, another of my favourite golden couple on screen:)

Anyway...that's about all. OH! I forgot to tell you guys what my favourite drama is:) Currently, it is still Devil beside me, followed by Miss No Good, and You're my destiny!

Actually,to be honest, I like Devil beside me more cos' of the actor and actress, but Miss No Good is plainly cos' this show is DAMN FUNNY. I reckon those who are down to watch it. Laugh like mad, just from Rainie Yang's taiwanese accent in the show. Of course in the show there are other characters that made me laugh too! Started laughing from the first episode till the end.

So, to conclude, I love to watch Taiwan Idol drama!!!

That's about all:)

P/S: I finally finish this entry!!! AND no, I am not saying taiwanese actresses are more real because I am jealous of Korean actresses' beauty.

ITs the DEC holidays!!!!!!!

2008-11-20T14:40:00.003+08:00

[ Woo hoo!!! ]

Hi people.

As promised, this entry will be with some photos la. Erm...although I realised alot of the photos have been deleted. In fact, my camera memory stick (2Gb) is corrupted and my portfolio photos all gone. I was soooooooooooooooooooo upset I tell you. But Da jie and Er jie were very nice (aka colleagues).

Anyway, I am not worried about it anymore. I couldn't care less now. You know why???????

IT'S THE DECEMBER SCHOOL HOLIDAYS!!!!!!!!! Who cares whether the photos are gone??? I already met the parents and gave them the portfolios and so far, no complains!!! Heh.

Anyway, just to let you in with a secret....May Phua (you know the Mediacorp actress), is enrolling her son next year...saw her in school that day. She is soooo pretty in real life, I tell you.

Enough about that. This December holidays I am going to be so busy....Let me tell you my plans before I show you guys the photos ok?

Nov 27: I'm straightening back my hair!!!!!!!!!!!! Enough of perms for now. Cos' its so dry it looks like a mop.

Dec 6: Johore trip with my bestie and colleagues aka. Da jie, Er jie and gan ba ba :)

Dec 11-14: WOOOOOOO HOOOOOOO! Thai trip with dearie!!!! and sis. Haha.

Dec 15-16: Not confirmed trip to Malaysia.

Dec 25-28: Cameron Highlands with my dad and bro. YAY!

So....you see, I am going on alot of trips. All fruitful trips cos' one with friends/colleagues, one with dear, one with my family! All with my love ones:)

Anyway, that's all I want to tell you about my holiday! Now I am going to show you guys some photos I took when I brought dear to this Penang hawker style buffet.....held at this hotel...Shit. I forgot the name. It's near Far East Plaza....

In case you thought it's some lok-kok run down buffet, it's not. It's quite high class, cos' its at this nice hotel restaurant...anyway, it's FREE!!! According to my future "Dr. Xue", anything that is free is NICE!!! My boss gave me the free dinner vouchers...each cost about $30 I tell you. My boss always eats at high end places:)

Anyway, in case you start thinking, "Wah, two vouchers to let you go dating only, so nice ah?" Actually she gave me one and Faith one, but Faith couldn't make it so I asked dear along. Too bad you guys didn't get to see his grinning face cos of the FREE food, cos' I accidentally deleted his photo:(

But nonetheless, you can still see all the nice Penang food!!! Since it's hawker style, you will see penang laksa, penang char kway teow etc.....

IT'S DELICIOUS~!!

Let the photos do the talking aye???

ALL the food!!!

Yummy!!

I was sooooo happy:)

My favourite: Penang fried kway teow! Ate like, 2 plates.

Fried oysters! Not bad:) Even though I am not a fan of oyster.

I think this is the laksa....is it?? It's good too.

Dear and I agreed this is the best too. He loves this, and I can't decide whether I love this or the kway teow more...I cant remember what it's called though.

I also cant remember the name of this dish. But it's got cuttlefish and some vegetables and I-forgot-what-else inside. But I remember the taste. It's yummy too:)

My favourite dessert!! Ice kachang:)

Dear's favourite Chendol!

Well...if only I didn't delete dear's photo accidentally:( Oh well. That's about all for the buffet.

I miss my NTUC kids!!!!

So cute right??My Kith and Shermaine....

Anyway...I realise I didn't take much photos of my children this year...I mean, I took alot, but it's for the portfolio....but I got this cute photo of Charis:)

I miss Seth and Christy!!!!!!!!! I didn't even take their photos lor. I am going to take lots of their photos next year, since I am going to be their teacher. YAY!

Lastly, I thought I should share this cute photo of dear with you people....cos' IT'S funny:)

HAHA:) He always makes me laugh:)

P.S: Sorry dear....couldnt resist:)

Busy as a beee

2008-11-05T22:46:00.002+08:00

[ Endure the last 2 wks of work ]

This is going to be a short entry to let you guys know that I am still alive.

Many things happen just after the last entry....oh well. It's such a long story....and anyway things are more or less okay.

I am HAPPY!! Cos' I finally get to follow up to next year with my children!!!!!!!!! So, yeah. Not staying back in Nursery. Remember I complained about how I never get to follow up and how much I miss the children????

So I am going K1 next year!!! AND I am going to fall sick! Headache and sore throat...I think I caught the virus that is running in my class...I have many children falling sick and one of my favourite boys was sick for a few days and he become so skinny now!!!!!!!!!!!

I have digressed again. It's a short entry cos' I am doing my work. What do I have to do before term 4 ends and I can enjoy my holidays:
1) Portfolio. (Photos with captions to do and print for term 3 and 4; assessing the children; cutting pasting of assessments, photos, and work.)
2) Rushing of children's work. (To see whether there are any more work that is undone and get them to finish it.)

For goodness sake, now I know why the enrolment here is soooooooooo good. They are learning writing of alphabets and names and numbers and blending of phonics, not just phonics, in NURSERY.

Sorry for the abrupt ending, but I gotta end now. Just to let you guys know I will be putting up photos in the next entry!!!!!!!!!!!! Many of them, in fact.

Till then, ciao!

I so wish I can go...

2008-09-08T19:58:00.003+08:00

[F1 night race!]

Haiz....

As my friends will know.....I am a fan of F1. Liked Ferrari and Michael Schumacher so much till he retired...ever since then, I am just supporting any driver from Ferrari. Currently, namely, Kimi Raikkonnen. And, it has been my dream to watch LIVE F1 race but it was quite impossible cos' it's too expensive (when Singapore wasn't the host, it is damn expensive).

AND don't tell me the crap like my mom told me. What, "Why watch LIVE? So waste money and uncomfortable cos' you will only be seeing the cars moving by once in each round, and the rest of the time you only watch from the big screen? Watch at home better, cos' more comfortable, and TV will show you from different parts of the race!"

PLEASE LOR!! Only a hardcore fan like me (my dad and my bro) will know the difference lor! I mean, it's seeing your favourite F1 cars LIVE and zooming past you AND the ambience AND the first NIGHT STREET RACE in F1 races!!!

NON-fans will not know the difference. Just like I don't see why people from the European countries can be so on to watch their soccer matches LIVE in the stadium when you can't see the players very well can you?

I guess cos' I am not a soccer fan. Whatever! I am a F1 fan!!!!

I SOOOOOOOOOOOO WANNNNNNNNNNNNAAAAAAA WATCH F1 NIGHT RACE IN SINGAPORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But....I can't. Cos' the prices of the tickets are so expensive I tell you!!!

I know I know. Apart from the grand stand (which I really love to be there BUT SO EXPENSIVE! The most expensive one is about thousand over I think), which is real expensive, the single day or three day passes are quite affordable if you asked me. I mean, the cheapest one is the single day pass on Friday, 26th September, only cost $38.

But if you asked me, I won't be ONLY BUY $38 one day pass. If you know F1, Friday night is not the actual race night. The actual exciting race night is always on the last day, and F1 lasts 3 days. So if I want to buy, I will either buy the single day pass (Sunday aka actual race day) which costs $108, or 3 days pass (more value-for-money, cos' it's only $168).

I don't mind walking around at all! I mean, it's so much better cos' I can choose where I want to see my favourite team! I don't even care about being tired or what!

But do you know why I can't go????

Cos' I promised my dad and bro that I will bring them to go. More like treat them.

AND since I am so vain(shop too much) and my pay is so low and all, I over spent and can't afford the single day $108 or 3 days $168!!!!!!!!! For my own, yes, I can. For 3 people, sorry, I can't.

Since I can't bring them go, it will be very bad if I go myself, and let my dad and bro watch at home while I enjoy myself right?????? I mean, I already broke my promise:( still go and enjoy by myself.

AND it's my dad's birthday. He was hoping I will treat him to F1. In the end, I can only afford to bring him to eat.

Blame it both on my low wage and retail therapy!

HAIZ!!!!!!!!!! So badly want to watch:(

GAH! Have to save up next year, so I can bring 3 OF US TO THE 3 DAY OR ACTUAL DAY RACE!!

Busy me...quite.

2008-09-04T13:30:00.003+08:00

[ So fast! ]

Time flies so fast! Didn't seem to enjoy much of my school holidays...in resting I mean. Cos' Monday I spent the day with bro....then yesterday I spent it with nana....

So I only rested on Tuesday and today...but don't get me wrong, I am not complaining. Just marvel that it is already Thursday, almost the end of my school holidays!

Actually, officially the end, cos' from tomorrow onwards I have to wake up very early in the morning. Since I am a night owl, I hate to wake up early.

But really happy that I got to meet dear, despite the fact that he is so busy. I mean, he makes the effort to meet me cos' if not we won't get to meet during the weekdays. So today, he met me for breakfast again! I was late:( Sorry dearie~

OH! I also want to thank those parents and children who gave me Teachers' Day present. I think this year is the most I have gotten...compared to last time. I have got TWO whole big paper bags of flowers, chocolates, notebooks, pen(parker, ok!), keychain, cookies, pencil holders, and the most interesting one I have gotten....guess what?

Whitia moisture cream, lipgloss and 2 professional nail polish(real expensive ones from manicurist)!!!! So happy!!!

Interesting isn't it? But not to mention it's very useful ok? For a vainpot like me...who has countless facial products.... HEH:)

Wonder what I will get next year...haha...greedy me.

On a more serious note, I really want to thank those parents...but it's difficult to remember who gave and who did not...so, just want to thank them in any case.

Ok...change of topic, I have a love-hate affair with my ipod classic.

Well, it's bad enough that it has to be using itunes instead of any other program(like windows media), the converting of videos to make it ipod-friendly is killing me!! It takes dinosaur years to convert videos!!!! Probably cos' my fujitsu laptop is from dinosaur years too...since it was bought from my poly days ok!

In any case, once I reformat my laptop...and I didn't keep my previous itunes library songs....thats it lor!!! The stupid ipod can't save the songs that's inside it....meaning, I have thousand over songs in my ipod, if I don't keep another copy, that's it man! If you reformat your com without having extra copies....when you re-download itunes from the apple website, when ipod synches new songs from the new library, it has to DELETE THE OLD SONGS INSIDE THE IPOD!!!!!

Crazy right??? What's the point of having an 80GB ipod when I can't store songs peacefully inside???

Anyway I found a solution for it...it's very stupid...but those of you who wants to know can ask me!! (But it's a stupid idea, I forewarn you)

Gah! Look at the time! I gotta eat my lunch:) That's enough crap for now.

School Holidays again!!!

2008-09-02T12:13:00.005+08:00

[Yay! Sept holidays!]

Well.....as you can see, I am super happy cos' it's the holidays once again:)

Dear has been really nice to me lately. So happy:) First he bought flowers(for teacher's day I think)....then he met me for breakfast this morning. Heh. You might think I am easily satisfied...indeed I am.

But, you have to know that now Dear is having his final yr in his studies...Honors' year you know. He is so busy everyday...like, he has to reached school at about ten/eleven/twelve(some days), then he has to stay till eight/nine p.m. at night! Such long hours right???So stressful! Reminds me of my Wheelock College days, which I worked the whole day and studied till ten during week nights. But Dear seems to be taking it well.

So I am glad he sacrificed some of his sleeping time for me, cos' other than breakfast, there is no other time for me...cos' he studied till so late at night. AND today is his long day in school, till nine p.m. Anyway, we went to the market for breakfast, which I finally got to eat the carrot cake:)

Anyway, this Friday I am going to do my hair! (Still owe Zen, my cute boyish hairdresser, a drink) Tomorrow I am going to meet nana!!!!! SOOooooooo long never see her!

Anyway...I promised you guys some photos....so today lots of photos will be put up!

First coming up...photos from my birthday celebration:) Dear brought me to this place at Gilman Village call Beer Station. We went there twice:) First time we went there for my birthday celebration, and more photos taken during the second time we went with Qi which was a very last minute decision cos' we didn't plan to go there!

You know...Beers are dear's favourite. After all, he brews his own beer, and for someone who does not really like beer (me), I kind of like it :) So proud of him:) Sorry, I have digressed.

Anyway...Beer station's food and beer, to me, are very tasty. AND their beer is from Czechoslovakia. But for beer lovers like Qi and dear, it's simply too bland...and not bitter (I like! Heh, maybe I should move to Czechoslovakia.)

Let the pictures do the talking, aye?

The place:

First time we went there for my birthday:

My dear, holding the menu:)

Myself, holding the beer that I like from Beer Station!

My food! Grilled peppered dory fish:)

My food and my beer:)

Dear's chicken kebab (I think)! He said it's so tasty!

Dear's food and his beer (which I don't like as much as mine)

The second time we went there with Qi (Qi took the photos and she didn't send me hers):

Me and dear:)

Good ol' me.

The specialty beer from this place...

Overall, I had an enjoyable time during my birthday. However,the sad thing is, me and dear agreed that Beer station is going to close down very soon, cos' even on Saturday nights there isn't much people....can you imagine?

And just ordering only the beer or the finger food is simply not worth it...the finger food cost abt $8 with only a few pieces? And if you only order the meal it's about $12. And the beer is the usual $10+. But when you order combo, meaning the full meal set together with the beer, its only about $16? So of course we ordered the combo....duh.

That's about all for the Beer Station. Next photos coming up....Dear and I went to the Raffles Marina Country Club again! Few photos ahead:

My boy...with the yachts behind him.

Moi...happy to spend some quiet peaceful time with dear.

Me and dear:) We were happy to spend some peaceful romantic time in such a beautiful place...cos' we were directly facing the:

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beautiful sea!

And me and dear watched the sunset together! Such a breath taking scenery, I tell you. But my handphone camera couldn't capture the sunset very well:(

Enough about me and dear:) Next few photos were taken during the time Qi came clubbing with me with my colleagues, who are like sisters to me:)

We went double O. And I enjoyed the dancing very much! Retro night and they always play my favourites like "Billie Jean"(don't care what people say about MJ, he is the best singer/dancer ever) and "It's my life"!! (though I hate it when there are lechers around)

Photos!!:

Me and Qi and my colleagues (except for the nice guy, he is their friend).

Us again! (Not taken very well)

Me and Qi!!! Best pals ever!

Myself! With the jug of...I can't remember:(

Lastly...just some photos I had taken with Qi when we went to suntan, which I wore my favourite black/gold Billabong bikini!

Moi lazing on my favourite mickey mouse towel:) This was taken when I still have my blue black hair and haven't permed them yet!

Me and stella artois! Not bad actually.

More cam-whoring ahead at Sentosa!!:

Cam-whoring at Spageddies with Qi!:

That's enough photos, don't you think? That's all for this post:)

Thank you dear, for being here,

2008-08-12T18:01:00.006+08:00

[By my side]

Been feeling really down recently...
But luckily, fortunately,
I have him.

He is here,
By my side,
Giving me love,
Showing me concern,
Caring for me.

He hugs me when I cry,
Kisses me when I tear,
Cheers me up when I sob,
Promises me a better tomorrow,
Giving me a sense of security,
Keeping me safe from all harm.

No doubt we quarrel,
Just like any other couple,
I shout at him,
He stares at me.
I hate him,
He hates me too.
Times that I want to strangle him,
Or simply hate him for his attitude,
Or even wonder whether he truly loves me.

But the most important thing is,
When troubles come my way,
When I need him,
Need his listening ear, his encouragement, or his simply just being around.
He is just right here,
Forgetting his hate and attitude,
Remembering his love,
Always ready,
To listen to my woes,
To hug those tears away,
And to just simply,
take care of me.

It is bad times like this,
That I see and feel,
What true love is all about.
And I am thankful,
That I have met,
My true love.

Just being random

2008-07-25T21:34:00.006+08:00

[ Random thoughts ]

Certainly living up to the nick "Uncle Chan"('dre) give me. Miss Random.

Yeah. I am feeling random now, if there is such a feeling. Haha.

It has been a roller coaster week. Was feeling really unhappy+sick yesterday. Not cos' of quarreling with dear (thank god). It's just a colleague at work bullying my good friend/colleague that I recommended to come work at my current work place.

I was really having fever, AND feeling sick that this work place had such colleague to create this kind of politics (Really, without her, my work place is FULL of caring colleagues and NONE of bitching ugly people and politics).

I mean, if I LOVE politics, I will join the politician world, or at least the business field, since the pay as a kindergarten teacher is FAR from fantastic (blame it on my retail therapy and fashion sense and vanity). So why suffer at a place with bad colleagues AND pay (though there is the fact that I stay for my passion in teaching young children)?

Since the "politics" stuff is solved, as the bullying/controlling colleague already knows where her fault is (I hope she really does), I don't want to mention what horrible things she had done to my friend.

So I am very happy now! Haah. Cos' everything is going very well at work (with great and very nice colleagues and good boss!), so I don't care how low my wage is, I am not leaving here. AND dear says he can accompany me more next week! And I am meeting dear tomorrow.

AND dear says next week he is accompanying me to club with my colleagues!!! Yay! Supposedly a celebration for August babies:)

I think I can only enjoy next week only....cos' dear is starting his honors year the week after, and seriously, that is going to keep him real busy.

OH! I didnt take much photos on the Genting trip with dear's sister and brother-in-law. In fact, there are like only two? And they are with dear. Real funny photos if you ask me though.

It seemed as though the only photos I can show you people (since I havent been showing any for a long time) are the ones I took with Qi suntanning at Sentosa, and the field trip I went with my children....I guess I will show you the next entry, together with the Sports Day we will be having on 6th and 7th August in our school! Haha:)

So look out for the next entry. I promise I will put up alot of photos next entry:)

P/S: I realised I didnt tell you guys I permed my short hair. Yeah. I found a new fantastic cute-looking hairdresser (thanks to Faith), whom I owe a beer to, and he also owes me a drink! Haha. AND I want to say how lucky I am that I have a good boyfriend who doesnt restrict what I wear! SO I can be vain and fashionable and wear my favourite boots and shorts!:)

The meeting...

2008-06-20T19:29:00.004+08:00

[ PHEW! ]

Yeah. I'm one happy happy ~~girl~~ woman.

FIRST....my blue black hair received positive remarks....as in by all my colleagues/good pal (Faith). You know, comments like, "you look better in this hair colour", "you suit this hair colour" and "you look good in it, like a china doll" really made my day. Thanks:)

In case you are wondering, why am I so happy about that? Of course besides the obvious reason that I AM A GIRL, and usually most girls LIKE SINCERE COMPLIMENTS (those who don't seem to like being complimented are either lying or they are just simply WEIRD). Another reason is because when I had dark hair (like black or purple-black/dark purple) last time, most people tell me I look better in brighter hair colours. AND thus, I tried brighter colours (strangely, I used to feel that I looked better in brighter colours too).

BUT if you ask me, I sincerely prefer dark goth black hair nowadays....simply cos' I have always like the colour black (besides purple), AND I am SICK of blond/brown/red/pink.

THEN.....when I dyed this blue-black, I was worried I would get negative remarks again, AND most importantly, that I myself might ALSO DON'T THINK IT LOOKS NICE ON ME. But somehow.........the result came out......AND I LIKE IT.

Don't ask me why. It's not exactly blue anyway. It's just like the dark purple-black that I have dyed before (you know, purple that is soooo dark that it looks like black that kind), and I didn't like it, neither did quite a number of people(including my children last year). So I am still thinking of a reason why I like it better this time, since this dark blue-black hair dye looks just like the dark purple one, as in, it's sooooooooooooooo dark that it looks almost purely black.

Maybe it's cos' it's glossier? This blue-black dye looks glossier than the dark purple one. HMM....maybe it's cos' I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO sick of bright coloured hair that I convinced myself I liked this dark hair subconsciously??

I DON'T KNOW. But whatever it is, somehow the feedback is more positive than negative than the previous dark hairdos....

NEVERMIND.

I am more happy with the second thing that I am going to tell you. Remember I said I am worried about my boss's wrath???

WELL, I CLEARED! Though she didn't give me a compliment....as in like, she didn't seem to like it, she said, "Too black." BUT AT LEAST SHE NEVER ASK ME TO PLEASE CHANGE MY HAIR COLOUR. PHEW!!!!!

To me, that is a plus+++++++++++. It's enough. I am not hoping for a compliment from her, since all my colleagues already did:) As long as she didn't ban me from this hair colour, I AM ONE HAPPY WOMAN:)

Cos' it means I don't need to waste anymore money, AND crack my brains to think about what other hair colour I want:)

YAY!

P/S: I wonder whether I can wake up on Monday for work.....I am used to being a nocturnal mammal especially more so during the school holidays. I think I over-slacked. AND I wasn't trying to boast about myself in this entry, for all those twisted minded imbeciles who think too much and therefore think I was trying to do that.

The last day

2008-06-19T16:06:00.008+08:00

[ 3 more days to the end of holidays...]

How I am going to spend it:

Friday: Go back to the Kindergarten for meeting (possibly facing the wrath of my boss about my hair).

Saturday: Suntan!!!!!!!!!!! Wearing my favourite black Billabong bikini.....(hopefully it is not a tad tooooooooooooo small at the top to cover my breasts). And meeting dear in the late noon....

Sunday: Spending time with dear.

Anyway, last Sunday I spent a smashing time with my dad and bro and we watched Incredible Hulk. IT IS A GOOD SHOW. You know, realistic, and very unlike the usual forray of the superheroes....

Hmm...I went library with my bro yesterday. I mean, yeah, since I got nothing better to do, and he had something very worthwhile to do (after all, he is in ACJC, and they are having exams next week, when school reopens). So I accompanied him. And forced him to admit that I am a good sister(MUAHAHA!) to accompany him since nobody did (more like, he didnt ask his friends along).

Ended up, it really made me realize HOW POPULAR MY BRO IS. I mean, I have heard he was very popular in school (from a distant cousin that was studying in the same sec school as him), with him being in athletics (since primary school, and quite a good one at it, till he was almost selected at Singapore Sports School. LIFE CAN BE SO UNFAIR AT TIMES, cos' he got most of the good genes in my family, you know, the brains and looks and sports.) till now, where he is in JC.

Now, usually, he doesn't need me to accompany him. H~~is huge fan base~~ His so many pals will be glad to accompany him. Not to mention that he has alot of gals after him as well (from all the phone calls at our house). But I love my bro....cos' he is very sweet to me:) You tell me la, which bro in the world will console and hug their sister when she cries? Mine does lor:)

Anyway, as usual, I have digressed.....yeah. We were at the library, him saying that he didn't want to meet his friends, cos' he said usually with his friends around he couldn't study, and so...I was there....AND I saw for myself how POPULAR my dear bro is. I MEAN, in the five to ten minutes that we were there, we saw about 5 of his friends????

Yeah, you will be saying, no big deal, cos' IT IS ACJC's exam next week. BUT....some of them were from his SEC and PRI school!!!!!!!!! PRI school you know????????????? AND not his close friends but somehow they knew him that kind of thing!!!!!!!!! I was like, since he have so many of his friends there, MAYBE I should just leave while he could stay there with them. But of course, he didnt dump me alone....even if he sort of like, knew them.

How many of you go to the library, and sort of like say HI everywhere? You tell me lah....AND funniest thing is, his senior thought I am his girlfriend. TELL ME. DO I LOOK SO KIDDISH?????????????

Maybe it is the fact that I am facing kids ALL DAY LONG. It makes me kiddish. But I haven't been facing kids for the entire MONTH!!! GAH!

I would love to take it as a compliment, but I cant because I am SIX YEARS OLDER than my brother, and I would love to look PRETTY, not KIDDISH. AND I didn't dress like a kid either...I was wearing my black combat boots AND blue jean shorts AND sexy black top which totally shows off my tattoo. GAH!!!!!!

Ten years later I will probably appreciate the fact that people mistook me as my brother's gf. NOW I am very unappreciative. Not that my bro is ugly or what (DUH, popular with gals leh?). Apparently the people he hung around with are much nicer...you know, better than MY SEC SCH mates who claimed I was some hideous looking creature that they didn't know what my dear sees in me (cos' he was popular with girls too), cos' at least my bro's senior didnt comment how ugly I looked(probably he is worried about incurring wrath from my bro if he says that, heh. THAT'S HOW SWEET MY BRO IS).

How come people AROUND me are the popular ones? OR rather why am I surrounded by popular people????? For goodness sake, I just love to be invisible or low key....whatever lah. JUST IGNORE ME.

Well....enough about the popularity of my bro and what not. Today is my last day of slacking, and waking up really late.....:( I am having mixed feelings about the school reopening......I will just take one step at a time.

YEAH.

P/S: Forgot to mention that Dear was SO SWEEEET!!!! He came to the library to find me and my bro, which was kind of last minute cos' he had to go home for dinner (to save money), and even though he was tired from a long day at work, he still came to teach him (cos' my bro had alot of things he doesn't understand about chemistry) till about eight plus at night and he didn't even complain about being hungry:) Feel so bad:( yet happy at the same time. Thanks dear, if you're reading this:)

The last week

2008-06-17T20:54:00.002+08:00

[ There goes my holiday ]

Yeah. It's the last week of school holidays.

So sianz. I have been slacking soooo much. That I didnt even look for a holiday job. I guess I just wanted to slack since....I never appreciated school holidays before. Heh.

Anyway, since school is reopening....I am worried about something. I mean, besides the fact that I am worried about whether the children will adapt after they had been gone for so long....

IS the fact that I just D.I.Y. dyed my hair. Yeah. Have no money(and actually, no need to) go to the salon and do it. After all, my dyed hair from home usually looked like quite well done....thanks to my maid's help:)

But the main worry I have is not about dyeing my hair. IT's about whether my boss is going to accept the colour.....

Cos' she usually does not accept colours that are toooo bright, you know, she was the one who asked me to dye my bright sunshine reddish blond hair to, you know, darker colours. That was her condition to hire me.

I totally don't mind. Cos' I know it IS a church kindergarten and all.

AND because I understand it IS a church kindergarten and all....

I have no freaking idea whether she will accept my current hair colour.

NOnononono....before you start guessing....IT IS NOT BRIGHT AT ALL. In fact, it is sooooooooo dark....that that is the reason I am worried about.

Sounds confusing? I mean, you guys must be wondering if I have dyed such a daaaaaaaaaaaaark colour I shouldn't worry, right??? So why am I still worrying?

BECAUSE....................IT IS BLUE IN COLOUR.

Before you start imagining me to be Sailor Mercury.....it is DARK BLUE, NOT bright blue, or turquoise, or sky blue. It is soooooooooooo dark, it's called blue black on the package that I bought. Which is a really good deal if you ask me, cos' those of you who dye hair at salon often know how expensive it is to dye in a salon....

AND my D.I.Y. kit only cost like 10 bucks, AND it kinda of look really just like what was shown on the package...which totally change my opinion about this brand of D.I.Y. hair dyes. Cos' I used to really dislike this brand, when I used once before (was trying to dye bright auburn, which the package stated that it will lighten my already brown hair) and the colour turns out like as if I never dyed at all. So ever since I have sticked to LO'real, cos' usually it turns out just like the colour on the package.

BUT LO'real does not have blue black, nor is it cheap...comparing to other commercial brands anyway. And since I was broke, I decided to buy this cheap brand and give it another try again.....THANKFULLY, it WORKED. As in the result does follow the package and all.

Well, if you guys are DYING to know what brand....it is Garnier...not the green package one. The red one. That claimed it is THE BEST.

But I will suggest you guys not to try the ones that promise to lighten your hair colour from Garnier....if you want lightening of hair colour, try LO'real or Beauteen Bleach.

GAH!!! I have digressed! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW??????????? I don't want to dye back my colour!!!!!! Cos' I really like my blue black hair (that sounds funny). I just hope and pray that she will not notice it is daaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrk midnight blue....cos' my brother and maid said it looks more like black.

I just really pray that she thinks it is black. Yeah. And she can accept it, even though to my brother, it looks like weird black.

GAH! Just try my luck on Friday, which I have to go back for some meeting.

HOPE it's not obvious puh-leaseeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

p/s: I heard red and blue hair dye are the easiest to come off. Red, I experienced before and I know of it....having dyed purple, red and pink before........but blue? I am experiencing it. Let's see how long Garnier can last.....LO'Real's red series are really quite lasting...better than salon's anyway. Serious, cos' it's tried and tested by moi:)

Holidays!

2008-06-06T15:36:00.002+08:00

[ How I spend the holiday weekend ]

Yeah.

As you can see, I have been blogging more often recently. Still watching my collections of DVDs and VCDs...Yes...I have alot of them. Cos' I am a movie/drama serials fan:)

Currently still watching My Date with A Vampire 3 :) I loveeeeeee Ma Xiao Ling:)

Have been playing maplestory too. Faith said she also wants to play. Too bad I can't play Scions of Fate:( Thanks to my laptop. I am still having a love-hate affair with my Fujitsu laptop.

Enough about that. Since I am enjoying the holidays....and I have nothing to blog about, how about just letting you guys know what I am going to do this weekend??

I am going to meet Mel later!!!!!!!!! Miss her sooooo much!!!

AND I am going to stay over dear's place throughout the weekend:) And tomorrow night, heard Fion and Kevin are coming over his place to play mahjong:) I am still a noob when it comes to mahjong:(

So that is roughly about how I am going to spend my time during the holiday weekend. Nothing exciting, but it is always a blessing to spend some free time with love ones:)

P/S: I WANNA WATCH Street Fighter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Heh, it's next year, but I was just surfing net and realized that they will feature Chun Li as the main character!!!!! My favourite character in Street Fighter you know, and the best part is, my favourite actress (besides Angelina Jolie) Kristen Kreuk is going to be acting as Chun Li:) Can't believe I am so looking forward to a movie that is only going to show next year. Heh.

Plans for the future....

2008-06-05T15:41:00.003+08:00

[ Why I am not moving on ]

Yes. I had enough of it. People asking me now that I've gotten my degree, what are my plans for the future.

I mean, I understand, they all meant well. Alot of them keep telling me that I can now be a principal, and MANY of them told me to move on to primary school. Cos' being a principal/primary school teacher = more salary.

Which is good for me, cos' I am someone who indulges in retail therapy. I LOVE dressing well and pretty cos' I feel good when I look good.

SO why am I still here? Why am I not moving on? Many of them asked.

SO once and for all, I am going to say it HERE.

First, on why I do not want to be a principal. At least, NOT NOW or any time soon. Maybe one day when I am much older I MIGHT. I do not want to be a principal SIMPLY COS' I don't want to lose touch with the children.

I am sure all of you know roughly the job scope of a principal. Do you think they handle children first-hand ALL THE TIME? No. They don't. They are more often than not dealing with teachers, parents, accounts, other staff, all the miscellaneous stuff.

THEY DON'T TEACH. At least not much. They don't spend much time with the children, unless teachers are not around and they have to help out.

I just want to be in touch with the children. Yeah, so I am most likely continuing to teach...despite the low wage (as in compared with other occupations).

Secondly, I don't wish to teach primary school children. Yes, the pay is higher. But the thing is, the work load is much more too. Like dear always used to say I work full-time, but pay is only part-time(when I was working at childcare). At primary school, pay is higher, but work load is so much more. Not that I am scared of workload. After all, when I was at NTUC, workload is high too.

I don't mind high workload if the children I teach are children I really love. Primary school children are out of the question. They are no longer cute and innocent. Face it, nowadays primary school children are already talking about BGR when during my time we were still playing five stones, UNO cards and barbie dolls. They are so rowdy, I cant fathom what I will do if I am in a room full of them. It's probably either they die or I die.

Children nowadays are made of much different stuff than children of the past. They mature earlier.

Preschool children are much more different. Even though they are much smarter and mature than children during my time, in general, they are still innocent.

I am teaching nursery class now. Due to the fact that the children nowadays mature earlier, they already understand lots of things, like caring about others. In the past nursery children were more self-centered, which is normal. But the nursery children I am teaching now will ask me whether I am ok when I coughed or sneezed. They will even ask me to pretend to be their grandma/mother cos' they miss their grandma/mother.

That kind of sweetness and the things they say that are innocent, straightforward, yet smart will make me smile and marvel at their ability to think. Which I don't think I can find in primary schools.

I mean, I am sure there are good primary school children that are innocent. But I rather not take the risk and face the majority horrible ones.

Gah! You get my point now? That's all for now.

I miss Seth and Christy and Brandon:(

OH! I saw Cerise yesterday at IMM when I was with dear. She was so shy. Dear didnt believe me when I told him how pretty she is, cos' he commented that how pretty can she be when her mother is.......HAI. She really looked like those pretty eurasian, even though she is only 4 years old. Everyone who walked by my class said she is really pretty. Even I myself, who love to look at pretty things, especially girls, will find myself looking at her. HMM....we all wondered where she got her good looks from.

I must really miss them.

I better start planning for the Genting trip in June that I am going with dear and his sister and husband....

Hmm.

SCHOOL HOLIDAYS!!!!!

2008-06-02T23:20:00.003+08:00

[ Slacker - me ]

SCHOOL HOLIDAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I L.O.V.E. THEM!!!!!

Ok. Treat me as being yaya-papaya (arrogant). But I cant help but feel so happy that I have to scream aloud.

SCHOOL HOLIDAYS!!!!!!! Used to hate them. Cos' I used to don't have the privilege to enjoy them, and when it is during this season, I am usually more busy than usual, or places are more crowded than usual.

AND I used to hate it during my poly days that school holidays are like, cut short, cos' it used to be that poly has the same holidays as the pri, sec and JCs....Now I am so glad that the poly students are not having the same holiday period as the rest. Which is just as well, cos' do you know how packed Orchard and Bugis are now that it is the school holidays???

I am so happy that I have holidays now....cos' I have so much personal time. WAHAHA! Personal time for what??? Well, for doing my favourite things, like, slacking!!! Muahaha... I mean, slacking is the best way to spend time cos' it doesnt cost much money. (Sadly, there are some of my favourite things I would like to do but can't, due to money constraints)

I have been sooooo slack....like been surfing net, playing game, watching my favourite drama serials (yeah, I am so slack till I am re-watching My Date with Vampire 2). You might think I am simply not doing anything constructive, which is SO TRUE!!! WAHAHA. But I did not get to enjoy all these "slacking" privileges before, cos' my working hours used to be damn loooooooooong.

I am sure those of you who worked long hours know what I mean. Especially those of you who are studying part-time like I did. So, I am so happy to be slacking now. And do you know school holidays are good for me to recharge cos' I know the next term comes, I am going to be super busy again....

Facing children for five days a week are no joke, no matter how much you love and care for them. Serious. It can be really tedious and tiring.

And absence made the heart fonder. I am sure after this holiday, I will miss the kids so much that I will probably grab each of them and hug them. (Actually, I miss Seth and Christy already.)

AND I am trying not to think about next year's problem.....yeah.

I am such a slacker now that I am not blogging much, even though I have the time!!! I already promised myself that this holiday I am just going to be relaxing at home....and not go out much. I forgot who told me that once you are used to the idea of having holidays, you won't feel so happy anymore. I guess, for now, I still cant feel what she meant. WAHAHA.

So I guess by then, when I have that kind of feeling, it will be the time that I finally do something meaningful during the holidays, like doing volunteer work, dancing etc....

As for now..............I am going back to enjoying my holidays - by slacking. ALOT. (*evil lazy grin*)

P/S: I think I should get some extra job soon. Money not enough. But it doesnt fit with my slacking plan. AND, I have to postpone my guitar learning. It doesnt help that my dear thinks I am not going to learn it. I guess it's cos' I haven't even make pancake for him, which I promised to but didnt do it. Well, I AM A HORRIBLE COOK, so he cant expect much. But guitar is different. Really. The problem is more of the cash side. Blame it on the GSS. Of all times, it has to be during the school holidays. That is the only flaw in my otherwise perfect holiday.

DO YOU KNOW COFFEE BEAN'S "FLOURLESS CHOCOLATE CAKE" IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOO SINFULLY NICE???? I reckon they should rename it. It should be named "Heavenly Flourless chocolate" or something. Please try it!!!! Haha, I don't want it to be phased out, so I keep recommending people to eat it, though some people told me I am creating a sin here, by making people FAT. BUT it is damn nice can???????????

OH! And La Senza's lingeries are the best can?????? Some of their sexy pretty night gowns can be used as tops cos' they are simply too pretty for sleep wear only. IT is GSS now, I reckon you people to check it out. I bought some stuff there....and they are sinfully pretty and useful and sexy.

Gosh. I am supposed to be slacking already....till next time. :)

About next year's classes...

2008-05-21T17:40:00.003+08:00

[ Very upset ]

WHY???????????

Why I always cant seem to teach the kids that I want to teach???

Ok...maybe I am being too pessimistic....after all, my boss hasnt said anything except,"Next year, there's gonna be a reshuffling of the teachers."

Cos' the usual practice here is to follow up with the children that you taught, meaning I will get to follow them for 3 years.

Which is what I really like, but never have the chance to experience...

True, last year while I was teaching at NTUC childcare, I was the one who gave up THAT KIND of chance.

But I was perfectly in bliss when I hear from my principal this year when I first joined that usually the teachers follow up. Cos' it means I get to see how my children grow in the 3 years in terms of learning, etc, under my teachings and nurturings!

So can you imagine my horror when she dropped us the bomb yesterday that "there is gonna be reshuffling of teachers"!!!!!!!!

I mean, it's the USUAL PRACTICE that teachers follow up last time, except really exceptional cases. SO WHY???? Why must it be that after I JOINED, then suddenly, NO MORE USUAL PRACTICE!!!!

And I have the hunch I am not going to follow up with my this year's nursery darlings!!! And the MOST EERIE THING is that, my colleague/partner said she had the same hunch that I will not get to follow up, but remain at nursery level!!!!!!!!!!I mean, how come she doesnt have that kind of hunch about herself and our other partner/colleague, how come she has THE SAME HUNCH AS ME????????????

AND the saddest thing is that, I feel that they are the best partner/colleague in the world!!!!!!!!!! I mean, I have never seen such caring, understanding, sisterly, loving, NON-CALCULATIVE, nice and kind colleagues/partners that do not backstab and include you totally and whole-heartedly take care of you!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just when I thought my "suay" life is turning for the better, I have to face this!!!!!

So I am super upset. Not even in the mood to change my blogskin....just suddenly want to eat lots of my favourite food, like french fries (damn unhealthy, but since when I care, ha!) to de-stress.

Shall do that. Will update you guys the outcome:(

UGH!!!

2008-05-07T22:45:00.004+08:00

[ Addicted and oh so itchy!!!]

Yo.

Hope you guys are not bored by the tattoo entry.

Yes, tattoo is painful but tolerable. Things like toothache, menstrual cramps, heart ache and child birth are worse in terms of pain level.

AND it is addictive. Now that I know I can tolerate the pain, I wanted to do ANOTHER ONE!

But I don't know where or what. I mean, I really wanted to do one on my arm, since a long time back, but cos' of my occupation, I CAN'T. So, I had to do it on my back. Now I am contemplating on the idea of doing one at the middle of my back, but I already done one at the right side, so it looks weird if I do another one in the middle.

AND I really want one on my arm rather than the back. Right or left it doesnt matter. Havent decided what to put.

Haiz.

LET me tell you what is worse than getting a tattoo besides cramps, heart ache etc. IT"S THE HEALING PROCESS.

Can you imagine you itch like mad, but you CAN'T SCRATCH?? Cos' it is scabbing and if I scratch it and the scabs falls off my tattoo will turn out patchy. So it is best I don't do anything to it. So scratching is definitely out of the question, no matter how it itches.

UGH!!!!

Anyway, I will take a picture of it once it is completely healed. Now it's healing so it doesnt look as nice as when I first did it. It's kind of leathery and flaky, just like scab.

It is really not that disgusting la.

Anyway, will definitely update you guys if I decide to do another one:D

Dear is away and I miss him:( AND it is his birthday today.

P/S: Dear said I should do a tattoo on my ass for my next one when I told him I felt like getting another one:X He was really surprised I got one, he seemed to like it cos' the tattoo made me so happy:D. AND he said he bought some fun stuff for me from his trip. Hmm.

Proud of myself

2008-05-03T11:44:00.010+08:00

[ Triumph over fear ]

(Warning: Long entry ahead, not for people who cant stand long-winded entries)

Haha!

I am super happy and unhappy. Well, I am too happy to tell you what made me unhappy, so how about I tell you what made me happy for a change?

Well....I think you guys know how much I love tattoos and henna right? As in like, you can see under "Loves" under my profile right at the side of my blog and you will see them and also from my past entry that I love them:).

And when you read the past entry you will realise that I always do henna, and not tattoo cos' well, I am scared of the pain involved (and also afraid I will regret the tattoo when I grew old)...I mean, I have watched a documentary on it before, and it totally freaked me out, what with the needle and the blood:(

BUT......nothing beats trying it. HAHA! Yes....I went and got myself my own tattoo!!! And of course, my best friend accompanied me which, cos' of her neverending courage (if you know my bestie you will know she has a high level of threshold of pain) boosts my own courage:)

Well, I am so happy, I don't know how to start telling you the whole story. I mean, I didnt get anything extravagant so it is not so painful, but I am super happy cos' I overcome my own fear. You know how happy you can get when you overcome your own fear, and realized that your fear is not as fearsome as you think it is?

If you know what I am talking about you will understand how I feel. It's like being on top of the world:)

Let me show you my tattoo shall I? Then, I can tell you the story:)

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Nice????? I love it! Before you start anyhow guessing what it is...the tattoo is just a fanciful design of my own initial "J". Ok??? Not butterfly or the letter "f" or "t".

Well...Cos' a tattoo is going to follow you for life, you don't want to put a picture that you will regret. And I don't want one that is like, too big like an Ah Beng or Ah Lian (cos' I personally feel a tattoo is a piece of art, not a piece of vulgarity). Let me tell you what other pictures I considered besides my own initial: butterfly, dove, dolphin, snowflake, Neopagan pentagram (or called inverted pentagon) and northern star.

In the end, I decided on a fanciful letter "j" cos' that is my own name. Cos' I can never get sick of my own name, AND, it is so fanciful, it looks like a butterfly as well, which is just as good cos' I also wanted a butterfly.

But the thing is, I didn't choose other pictures cos' they held no meaning to me. I mean, I read from website dove and butterfly symbolises feminism, but, what if I regret it when I grow old???? I mean, in real life I am scared of all insects (which I hope I can overcome one day), and it includes the butterfly of course. So it is really stupid to put something you are afraid of, right?

Moreover, I don't know whether as I grew older I will find butterflies, etc....not as nice and pretty anymore, you get what I mean? As we grew older we change in our taste of things...like I used to prefer wearing short mini skirts, but now I don't, that kind of changes, you know? And since I felt a tattoo is a piece of art, I don't want something common...it should be unique and individual:) (My tattoo is kind of customized by my tattooist)

That is why I used to think that people who tattoo their husband/boyfriend/girlfriend/wife's name are crazy. I mean, what if you guys break up??? I don't know, it's a bit too show off about your feelings right? I mean, I know a tattoo is usually for show off, but not too much cos' a tattoo is also about the art and the meaning it has for you:)

Anyway, mine simply means me, cos' it's my initial, and it is simply to tell myself to love myself more:) Cos' when you love yourself, then you can love others. Of course, you don't overdo it. Like you know, become the kind of arrogant self-centered person that I hate. BLEH! I met that kind of girl and guy before. It's super disgusting.

Anyway, let me tell you the experience. It is really just like what you read on the website....the anticipation is worse than the pain. It's like, I really thought it was super painful, and that I will faint/vomit/cry, but when the needle touched me, I felt so -_-. If you get what I meant.

So I gave a blank look like this -_-, and Qi and the other guy from the shop thought I was too stunned and shocked for words, when I really feel like saying "CHEY". (I really should practice my facial expressions, seemed to be giving the wrong expression about my true feelings).

I mean, it IS painful. But it is tolerable...in fact, it only got more painful when Malvin (my tattooist) had to colour after outlining my tattoo. Qi said some people feel outlining is more painful than filling (colouring). But in my opinion, filling is more painful, cos' you imagine using a toothpick to colour your skin (you know like the stroking that you need to do when you colour on paper?). PAIN right????

Whereas outlining is just like writing, one stroke and it's done. And the needle is moving so fast, the pain is just like a toothpick touching your skin, unlike the filling part where it feels like the toothpick is colouring/scratching your skin.

BUT it is all tolerable. I have encountered worse pain than that, both emotional and physical, so it is really not THAT bad.

BUT of course, I have got one wonderful tattooist. I reckon those who had not gone for tattoo before but intending to go for one to go to him.

Cos' he is so passionate about his job, that he rather you get a tattoo you like than caring about earning money. Did you know when I went to him, I was the last customer (Qi went for touch up on her tattoo) AND, instead of rushing me cos' it's already 10p.m. and most shops are closed, he customized a tattoo for me???

He was also very patient with me, and charged me real cheap ($50, which other places charge at $100) and before you start thinking it is some sleazy shop, it is at Far East Plaza and the shop has been around for some time, and there are many tattooist in that shop and quite a number of people before me...

Actually Far East Plaza's tattoo shop usually charges at about $50...cos' Qi actually wanted to go to another shop where she got her piercing, but that bloody person lied to her. What happened really made us mad.

The whole story went like this:

Qi wanted to have a touch up on her tattoo. She asked me along cos' she needed company AND she knew I wanted to tattoo but I was too chickened (I hate to chickened out). So she wanted to go to the place called Exotic Arts at Far East Plaza where she got her piercing. They charged at $50 for touch up of tattoo, which is cheap. And cos' she trusted the place, she went there for her touch up of tattoo (after all, we don't want to go to a sleazy shop for a tattoo).

However, she already went down with her sister the day before and cos' the guy said he had full appointments, he asked her to come down the next day, which was yesterday, Friday and call before she goes down, but he should be free. Then when she called yesterday, he (freaking liar) said he has got an appointment till 9p.m.

SO that idiot told her to come down another day again! But Qi already made plans to meet me. So she told him she would come down anyway cos' that freaking liar told her it only takes about 10 mins to touch up. So after 9p.m., he would only need to do touch up for her for only 10 mins. (If you asked me, 10 mins for $50 is easy money).

AND that liar agreed to do for her after 9p.m., but he would call her. And Qi told him she was already at Orchard, just waiting for him to be done so she would just walk to Far East.

YOU know what the liar did??? He never called. By 9.18p.m., I was beginning to think that that guy could not be trusted. (After all, he kept telling her to come back another day despite the fact that her touch - up only needs 10 mins so it goes to show he is just not interested to stay after 9p.m., even if it is for 10 mins).

He really lied. He didnt call, and when we reached Far East at about 9.20p.m., that liar has long gone home. The whole bloody shop was closed!!!!

Anyway, it's just as well. A blessing in disguise!!! I am glad I gave my first time to Malvin (no pun intended). He is really patient, understanding(if you are a first timer), reassuring and gentle:). He reassured me that he would be gentle with me, and he really did. It was late, as it was already after 10p.m.(I think I mention it earlier), and yet he did not rush into things, from custom designing my "J" to tattooing it for me nice and slow, cos' he took about 45 mins to finish one letter "j", which is really not rushing.

AND he was funny. He jokingly told me to quickly pay up, which I asked him how come he didn't ask Qi to pay up before her touch-up, and he laughed. (I actually said I dont want cos' I am broke, honestly, not only cos' I was scared, but Qi is really nice about this, think she doesnt want me to chicken out) Then I got it that he didnt want me to backout last minute! Heh:)

I think he really knows I wanted a tattoo but didnt dare to do it, so he made up my mind for me, since according to him and his friend (who is also a tattooist), it is all in the mind, and the pain is tolerable, and that girls have higher level of threshold of pain (we can tolerate menstrual cramps)

And just like what I have read at Xiaxue.blogspot.com, hers also didnt bleed much, and mine certainly didnt. Usually only good tattooist will not let you bleed much:)

AND not only he is nice and friendly, reassuring and patient and understanding (after all, he could have tell me to hurry up and decide, rather than joke with me and customize my tattoo and patiently reassuring me to relax.) His friend, also a tattooist, was there waiting for him. He is very nice and friendly too, kept joking with me to reassure me, and telling me it is all in the mind:) He even tell Qi to take a picture of my expression when the needle first touch my skin, cos' he said my expression is priceless:D

So for first timers, I reckon you go to him (or his friends) cos' the environment there is friendly and nice (which is very important cos' usually this kind of places look intimidating, and if they are not friendly and understand that you are a first timer, you will feel so stressed out from the anticipation).

I have his name card below:)

His name is Malvin:) Too bad I didnt get his friend's name, he is also working there, and I reckon he is very nice and friendly too, so can find him as well:)

Ok...enough about my tattoo:)

I also wanted to post about a place I went with dear, or rather, he brought me there quite some time ago. The ambience is nice, and it is a restaurant where they brew their own beer (dear's favourite) So I think that is why dear brought me there:)

The place is called RedDot Brewhouse, or is it The Little RedDot? I cant remember:X Sorry. But their beer is quite unique, and for someone who doesnt like to drink beer, it is not bad:)

Me drinking Green monster (I think)

Dear drinking mine:)

And his drink called RedDot lime (I think)

That's about all:)

P/S: Pardon me for the long entry about my tattoo, even though my tattoo is not something big to boast about (which is the point cos' I don't want some big exaggerated tattoo like some gangster), but I am really excited that I overcome my fear, and didnt use anything as an excuse to chicken out (despite the fact that I am broke, but thanks to Qi, I didnt use that as an excuse). It is really euphoric to overcome your own fear of doing something you really wanted for years but didnt dare to.

Been sick for a long time

2008-04-29T22:10:00.004+08:00

[Don't know what's wrong with me]

Been feeling sick since the week before. Started on the previous Saturday (not the Saturday that just passed).

It started with sore throat. Real bad one. The kind of sore throat infection where no amounts of remedy helped immediately (except perhaps antibiotics). But I refused to go and see the doctor. I mean, I have been through this kind of condition before. And everytime I realize I rely too much on antibiotics to get well faster, which makes me feel even more weak.

Then after that, the "cheap and good" pills (according to dear) I got from Hock Hua medical hall was really good. I mean, usually with my throat so sore, the pain would not go away, but it helped me to get rid of the pain. (Though I suspect Mum's pure chrysanthemum tea helped too)

Now, you would have thought that with the throat no longer sore, I am well right?? WRONG! I started to have lots of phlegm, which resulted in cough and flu...and get this, lost of voice! YESH! I sounded like some sexy husky tranvestite.

Then...with the flu, I felt so lethargic. And the worse thing is, I am still having it TODAY. For goodness sake, I had THE FLU JAB. According to dear, that means what I am having now is not flu virus but cold. Which, to me, sounds like rubbish cos' HOW COME THE BLOODY COLD LAST SO MANY DAYS?

All the phlegm and flu (or cold or whatever) is making me really unhappy. Lucky I got my voice back, though it still sound lower than my usual voice. Even better is the fact that I persevered and did not see any doctor for antibiotics! Will keep up with that.

Enough of my sickness. The more I talk about it the more sick I feel. Anyway, I am really happy with a purchase I got recently! I am now, a fan of ~h20+ skincare products!

I am particularly in love with their sunblock and moisturizer:) Am too lazy to take photos to show you guys what I am talking about, but their sunblock and moisturizer is so good, cos' it is not oily yet hydrating at the same time! Especially the sunblock.

You know, I have been using so many different brands of sunblock before (both cheap and expensive), and none works for me. It is usually too oily, and I can feel it as I apply the sunblock. After apply other brands of sunblock, I always felt like my face is clogged with a layer of oil. So in the end, even though everyone tells me how important sunblock is, I didnt use it.

Now I don't have that problem anymore!!! ~h20+ sunblock is really superb. After applying it, I don't feel anything on my face. No oil, no cream, nothing. Its as though it has magically disappear into the skin.

So I am super happy now. Really must thank Faith for telling me about this product. She was the one who told me it's good. I mean, I heard of the brand before, but I didnt know it was soooo good. Well, at least, the sunblock is:)

Well...that's all for now:) Gotta get some beauty sleep:)

Many events happening

2008-04-27T20:48:00.002+08:00

[Not according to my plan]

Yo.

I know I haven't blogged for some time....as you can see from the previous entry I had already warned you people about, that I would be busy till....mid april. Yeah, that was according to plan.

Well, there are so many things to do when I finally submitted my portfolio you know...like, slacking around...watching my favourite drama serials...yada yada. I was really planning to blog soon. Really. So that was the main reason why I haven't blogged during like, mid april, as promised in previous entry.

Except that things aren't going according to what I had planned. Hai. I don't really feel like planning things now.

First thing that gone wrong...I wanted to show you guys the photos of dear's sister's wedding. You know, the one that I was the sister? Well, I didn't receive the photos from his sister's friends....so, I can't post them. I will ask from them...but you know, they are busy people. So it's not very nice. Should have used my own camera:(

Second thing that gone wrong...just when I thought when I am totally free....Haiz. There is an assignment that I gotta redo....I didnt feel consoled even though I wasnt the only one who has to redo. Cos it meant that I am still not...entirely free:(

Which is real sianz...cos' I really plan things for my supposedly free time...like take up tuition for extra income and also my ultimate plan is to learn how to play guitar just like Johnny Depp. No, I am learning to play guitar not ONLY cos' of Johnny Depp, puh~leaze....do you really think I am so obsessed with him? (Okok, fine, I admit I am quite obsessed with him) But I really like the sound of guitar. But there is no point talking about it right now cos' I am not so free anymore...probably end of may then I will be free to do what I plan:(

(I will show you guys a picture of my guitar once I get it...which you guys will have to wait till end of may, since I will be busy with assignment sigh! )

Anyway, since I have got no wedding photos to show you guys....might as well show you guys some random photos, to make up for my lack of sincerity in posting blogs:X

WARNING: Ugly photos ahead....(i seriously think I don't suit white colored eye shadow)

At The Arena with Qi :)

Me, with many many vodka. As dear's famous beer motto goes, "never waste beer", well, we shouldn't waste vodkas either.

Yeah, yeah, me acting cute. Which turns out not so cute, happy? Told you acting cute is TOTALLY not my style.

Side views are better, cos' you can't see one's monstrous face:)

Besties forever:)

I just love my best friend:)

P/S: Dear said I should learn piano. He was being sarcastic. Sarcastic or not, puh-leaze... do you think I really want to learn something so girlish (oops!), I mean, classy and prim and proper? I want to be guyish, rock-starrish and gung-ho to learn to play the guitar! Actually, its also cos' I've got friends who can teach me how to strum the guitar:) And the more Dear thinks I can't do it, the more I am gonna do it. HMPH!

The Final Countdown

2008-03-17T19:13:00.005+08:00

[Hibernation]

Yeah, as the title suggests, I will be in hibernation mode soon. Meaning, you can expect me NOT to be blogging for the next few wks....till mid April.

That is because, like I mentioned in previous entry, I have two final assignments due. One, is research based, is due next Monday, 24th March. That is the final assignment for my previous module "Helping children cope with stress".

The second assignment, is the BIG assignment that we need to hand in in order to pass this degree course. That is the portfolio I am talking about. A professional teacher portfolio. Which is worrying me cos' it is due soon, and I have not touched on it. it is due on 7th April.

And after that, I am FREE!!!! And Qi has already booked me. She wants me to go club with her. Heard some Australian DJ is coming down in mid April, which by then, I will be FREE!!! Yes, I must emphasized on the the "FREE", cos' I will have something to look forward to. I think I have enough studying for the time being.

Strange thing to note though, is that even though after I graduated from Ngee Ann, I actually don't mind studying more. To me, it is a MUST to get a degree. In Singapore, in order to survive, one must have the certificate. That is the reality. So even though studying at Ngee Ann was stressful, I wanted to study for my degree course. Cos' I know a diploma is not enough. I didn't really dread getting a degree then.

Now, even though my degree course is not as stressful as during the Ngee Ann days, but I somehow dread studying more. I think it is because I am working....and really, working+studying is more tiring then just studying. So even though Ngee Ann has more modules and projects and tests, I find studying for my degree more tiring. Or maybe it is also the fact that I am getting old. That explains all the illnesses (fever, diarrhoea) that I got so often.

Anyway, even though I did want to get a Masters, I am not so insistent and firm as I was when I wanted to get the degree. Even though I also feel a degree certificate is not enough too, just like how I felt when I got my diploma, I am not so insistent on getting a Masters as I was when I wanted my degree certificate....

I think I have enough of studying at the moment. I want a break. But, I will eventually still go for my Masters. Maybe after a year's break. My mom is more anxious....haha. She felt that if I finish my degree and don't continue, I will not want to study anymore. Just like how she felt last time when she was young...which I think she regretted her choice.

Well, she doesn't know how "kiasu" I am:) I won't just stop at degree level. But right now, I just need a break after my degree course.

And the most important thing in hand is to finish my two assignments. Anyway, after my hibernation, I will put up photos from dear's sister's wedding, which I helped out and some things happened(both happy and unhappy), till then...:)

Updates

2008-03-10T18:29:00.006+08:00

[March holidays!]

Heh:)

So many things happening. First, I am soooo super slack now. Cos' I am enjoying the March holidays! Wahaha...finally no need to envy other people who has a break during the school holidays...Cos' I am also having it now.

Anyway, there are many things to tell you guys. First, I have asked my friend, who was my ex-classmate from Ngee Ann, to join me at my work place. She worked with me before at my first work place ( which was the most horrible experience, even NTUC was much better), and since then after we quited the horrible place she joined a church kindergarten at Pasir Panjang area, while I joined NTUC.

Well...I would say I am glad I left NTUC. Really glad I listened to other people's advice (like my godmum and godsis and my close pals), not to stay on a place just cos' I can't bear to leave the children. Ultimately, children come and go...they will forget you...so lucky I never pass up the opportunity.

And I realized my previous thoughts about working at a kindergarten=don't learn much=not much interaction with children. Boy, how wrong I was! I learnt so much within such a short amt of time...especially children's songs. And I felt more like a teacher, cos' I really teach ONLY. Parents also tend to respect you more cos' they treat you like a teacher. I think it is also because this kindergarten is also a very "branded" and popular kindergarten, so parents take teachers seriously (that is not to say ALL parents from childcares don't).

And my boss is a perfectionist....demands alot from the teachers yet treat them really well. I am just happy here. Of course, it didnt hurt that they have school holidays as well.

And I really thank god that I have great partners at work. Partners who are not calculative at all, and helped me so much..if not for them, I would not have cope so well with the work load.

I do miss my ex colleagues though:( Ok...enough about work. I am supposed to relax!

This sat is dear's sister's wedding. I am supposed to be his sister's sister. So I am going to help out, and also to "torture" his sister's future husband. Heh:) So I have got things to look forward to this weekend. I hope I am not clumsy or anything...cos' I am supposed to help out. And his sister's wedding album is so nicely taken!!

What else....oh! I have almost finished my degree course! So happy! I just have this last module (where the final big project, the portfolio, needs to be done) and also the final assignment for the last module that I attended...Then I am free!

My mom asked me about Masters program though...I was like, I need a break! Not now at least...maybe next year or what...if I have the finance support from her(considering my pay is not enough for the expensive fees). Enough of studying for now.

Anyway, before I end off, I have some photos taken quite some time ago to put up....

At Settlers, Fion's birthday:

We went Settlers' cafe and Kevin decided to give Fion a pre-birthday surprise! So sweet of him:) Fion was so happy.

The golden couple:)

Fion's happy:)

All of us...with Andre's Australian friend who came for visit.

A rare photo of me smiling naturally...

At Attica Too's:

Qi decided to go Attica Too to see her one of her favourite Australian house music DJ on Australian Day! Here are some photos...

The said Australian DJ whom Qi wants to see...

Best friends forever!

That's all for now, folks:)

Final assignment!!

2008-02-10T15:55:00.000+08:00

[ Stupid module ]

I am rushing for my final assignment now. Problem is, I don't know how to do it. I am very stuck in it right now. Maybe I should just heck care and do it the way I interpret. This module is supposedly very helpful for my teaching. But I don't know how to do the bloody final assignment.
Anyway, I should get back to it. Just blogged to complain and procrastinate awhile. And also to upload another Johnny Depp's song in Sweeney Todd..."No place like London". A song that is sang by Johnny Depp and 'Anthony'(don't know what's his real name) right at the start of the movie. NICE! Heh:)

P/S: Photos to be uploaded in the next entry...from the Settlers cafe that I went with dear and RBG:)

Quite gross but I like it

2008-02-06T17:35:00.000+08:00

[My current favourite movie: Sweeney Todd]

Yeah...I know you will say I like the movie because I like Johnny Depp. That is true:) But it's also cos' I like the songs in the movie. I mean, Johnny Depp sang inside ok? Not only him but all the characters...because it's a musical ma! Duh. *Rolls eyes*

The movie is gross cos' Johnny aka. Sweeney kills alot of people inside and it is shown clearly how he slits his victims' throat. *Eck*

However, I still personally feel Johnny Depp is a good singer. Cos' he really portrayed Sweeney's sorrow, longing for his daughter and missing his wife, pain, wronged and vengeance in his singing. Call me biased if you want. You can be the judge. Listen to this excerpt from the movie from my imeem. Below is the lyrics to show you which is the part that Johnny Depp sang:

Anthony:
I feel you Johanna
I feel you
Do they think that walls can hide you?
Even now I'm at your window
I am in the dark beside you
Buried sweetly in your yellow hair
Johanna

Sweeney Todd:
And are you beautiful and pale,with yellow hair,like her?
I'd want you beautiful and pale
The way I've dreamed you were
Johanna

Anthony:
Johanna

Sweeney Todd:
And if you're beautiful, what then,
With yellow hair, Like wheat?
I think we shall not meet again
My little dove
My sweet
Johanna

Anthony:
I'll steal you
Johanna

Sweeney Todd:
Good-bye Johanna
You're gone and yet you're mine
I'm fine
Johanna
I'm fine

Anthony:
Johanna

Beggar Woman:
Smoke!Smoke!
Sign of the Devil!
Sign of the Devil!
C'iy on fire!
Witch!A witch!Smell that Sir?
An evil smell!
Ev’ry night at the Vesper’s Bell!
Smoke that comes from the mouth of Hell!
C'iy on fire!C'iy on fire!
Mischief!Mischief!Mischief!

Sweeney Todd:
And if I never hear your voice,
My turtle dove,My dear
I still have reason to rejoice,
The way ahead is clear
Johanna

Anthony (same time as Mr.Todd [below]):
I feel you Johanna

Sweeney Todd:
And in the darkness
When I'm blind with what I can't forget
It's always morning in my mind
My little lamb
My pet Johanna
You stay Johanna
(Anthony: Johanna)
The way I've dreamed you are
Oh look Johanna
A star
(Anthony: Buried sweetly in your yellow hair)
A shooting star

Beggar Woman:
There!There!
Somebody!Somebody!Look up there!
Didn't I tell you?
Smell that air!
C'iy on fire!
Quick! Sir!Run and tell!
More and more like a witch's spell!
There it is!There it is!The unholy smell!
Tell it to the Beadle, and police as well!
Tell 'em!Tell 'em!
Help!Please!
C'iy on fire!C'it on fire!
Mischief! Mischief!

Sweeney Todd:
And though I'll think of you, I guess
Until the day I die
I think I miss you less and less
As everyday goes by
Johanna

Anthony:
Johanna

Sweeney Todd:
And you'd be beautiful and pale
And look too much like her
If only angels could prevail
We'd be the way we were
Johanna

Anthony:
I feel you Johanna

Sweeney Todd:
Wake up, Johanna
Another bright red day
We learn Johanna
To say
Good-bye

Anthony:
I'll steal you

*******************************

Please don't be dumb and ask me which is the part Johnny Depp sang...HE IS ACTING AS SWEENEY TODD. What do you think?

Anyway, this excerpt is near the climax where he killed alot of people...including the villain and his most beloved wife. Johanna is Sweeney's daughter, and cos' Sweeney lost contact with his daughter (you have to watch the movie to know why, I am not going to say it here).

I personally feel it is a brilliant movie cos' the casting is really good. Even Alan Rickman (for those of you who don't know who he is, he is Professor Snape from Harry Potter) is inside! Heh, he is a very good actor and I simply have a soft spot for good actors and actresses. Actually the rest of the cast are good as well, including Helena(who act as Bellatrix in Harry Potter). I personally find the judge so hateful(thanks to Alan's brilliant acting). And I really felt sorry for Sweeney even though he is the killer:( (Johnny Depp really portrayed the agony and hate Sweeney felt well).

I simply love it when Johnny Depp and Tim Burton work together in a movie:) My favourite actor and director together:) Heh. Quite a treat for a movie fanatic like me. Well, if you are not scared of gross movies(you know, gore, blood, goth) and like musicals, go watch it! It's really worth it.

I also want to watch Fann Wong's movie leh! Shit la, I am going to be sooo broke:(

Anyway, I wish all of you a Happy Chinese New Year! Gong Xi Fa Cai! :)

Very Belated Post

2008-01-28T17:12:00.000+08:00

[Kukup photos - with cobwebs]

Eh...I know my blog has been collecting lots of dust and cobwebs. I am busy enjoying my shorter working hours now to blog. Heh:) Busy doing stuff like, slacking, zZZz, meeting dear, watching drama serials (which is equivalent to slacking), etc... after all, I didn't get to enjoy my first two weeks of job due to my classes.

Anyway, the long belated promised photos from the Kukup trip! Eh, I don't have many photos of the sceneries, cos' it is really not that fantastic, even though it is quite a nice place to relax and have fun, fun meaning relaxing kind, not the thrilling kind.

Well, photos ahead! Please pardon me but I am lazy to write captions for everyone of them. Anyway, the photos show it all...

The sceneries

The sparks we played...(We also even fired our own fireworks - the National Day kind ok, mind you! But I didn't take photos of them cos' of my camera.)

The fun moments...

The candid moments - I call them "The classics"

"The classics" presents.... "The Prisoners of Kukup":

"The ultimate classics of ALL classics":

Hehe!

Oops...I think somebody is going to kill me for posting his photos...But they are too funny not to be shared, right? Tee hee:)

Beautiful and meaningful song

2008-01-09T20:39:00.000+08:00

[And so true]

(I just swear that I'll always be there.
I'd give anything and everything and I will always care.
Through weakness and strength, happiness and sorrow,for better, for worse,
I will love you
With every beat of my heart.)

From this moment life has begun
From this moment you are the one
Right beside you is where I belong
From this moment on

From this moment I have been blessed
I live only for your happiness
And for your love I'd give my last breath
From this moment on

I give my hand to you with all my heart
Can't wait to live my life with you can't wait to start
You and I will never be apart
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment on

You're the reason I believe in love
And you're the answer to my prayers from up above
All we need is just the two of us
My dreams came true because of you

From this moment as long as I live
I will love you, I promise you this
There is nothing I wouldn't give
From this moment
I will love you as long as I live
From this moment on

All I am going to say in short...

2008-01-09T20:22:00.000+08:00

[if you are to leave]

I will miss you so so much.

And I will be waiting for you.

Laziness overwhelms me

2008-01-07T22:44:00.000+08:00

[Sick and lazy]

Yeah. I am still not feeling well. Of course I have stopped vomitting and all. But I seemed to have caught the flu bug, and it's a bad one.

Anyway, I really wanted to upload the photos from Kukup trip, but I really don't have much pictures with me. It's all with dear, Andre and Fion. Well, most of it anyway. They uploaded it under yousendit.com, and seriously, when I downloaded it, it's in rar.format.

And my labtop DOES NOT read rar.format. *Kwah kwah*

Sianz. Must find one day bring my thumbdrive go dear's place to upload.

Plus I am sick and so feeling lazy, so I also don't feel like uploading the few photos that I have. Might as well when I have many photos then I upload it at one go, right?

Yeah, yeah, some people hate lazy bums, but I just like to be lazy from time to time...sue me la. Heh.

I really should not be so relax and lazy...my assignment is not really done.

My new work place is cool. All my worries are...appropriate but I passed the days without looking like a loserish teacher. At least, from the comments my principal gives...it's a hectic and fulfilling 6 hrs plus work. That is what I will say.

Let's hope tomorrow is a better day...NO MORE FLU please. I will really like to work on my assignments. It's due very very soon.

That's enough crap for now.

More updates

2008-01-03T22:03:00.000+08:00

[More updates]

Was sick. Really sick. On my first day of work somemore. Vomitted and had diarrhoea. It was so bad, I was really worried it would be like last year's episode of me ended up in hospital. Well, if you guys read my last year's entry.

I felt so bad ok. Cos my new principal was so nice. I did not want to leave a bad impression on her. So I tried to tolerate. But I can't help running to the toilet and vomit. In the end she noticed and guess what she did? She sent me to the nearest clinic, and paid for my medical bills.

I feel so damn bad can? I am so sure deep down inside she was having doubts about hiring me. Blaming me for being sick. Blaming herself for hiring me. It was my first day ok! Talk about bad impression! Moreover, she seemed to have high expectations from me, and imagine that is my performance on the FIRST day.

Sighz! I was trying my very best to do my work and doing my best so that I leave a good impression on my new boss, then after eating lunch, I started to vomit non-stop. It wasn't the lunch, but most probably cos' I was already having diarrhoea before that, I should not have eaten the curry...I guessed it made it worse.

Anyway, IF my new principal really has a bad impression of me, she really did a good job of hiding it. Haiz...which is all the more why I wanted to leave a good impression tomorrow....and I am worried cos' tomorrow is the day where the new children with parents coming....what if I am at a lost of what to do??? That is the worse case scenario ok? The teacher-in-charge looking lost and lack of confidence....I think I lost all confidence ever since I left my previous workplace, I can't believe I was the one who hosted the KIC event for K1 and Xmas judging by the lack of confidence now....

UGH...I just have to take it as it comes...and please, hope to God I am healthy too! If I am sick it doesn't help my level of confidence too...

Bless me.

new skin!

2007-12-16T12:14:00.000+08:00

[Updates]

Despite the lack of my labbie, I managed to change my blogskin again. This time, it features my favorite Emily the Strange! Heh. I went over to dear's place, finding xmas carols' lyrics and games, and changed my blogskin pretty fast! It took like only twenty minutes or so for everything to be done plus the edited parts from the original skin:). Happy like what.

But I don't know what is wrong with it? Probably I have edited too much things from the original skin that sometimes when I view it everything is nice, like under my "Loves & Hates" column, sometimes it shows the heart shapes under the things that I love(which is what I intended), sometimes when I view it it seems to be showing all signs of foreign language or curse words.

Like "#!@" instead of the heart shape I intended...same for the sign before the words tagboard, loves & hates, the strange etc...also have curse words. I know this is emily the strange blogskin...doesn't mean have to be SO strange right? There was once I view my skin and saw my entries ALL underlined....talk about freaky. But sometimes, it's ok. Cursed skin I guess...

So bear with me if you see my skin in chaos all right? Cos' it will return to normal sometimes...Heh.

***********************************

Sometimes things are so unexpected....besides my leaving the centre, my god sis Teacher Lay Hoon is also leaving.

I really feel worried about my god mum Auntie Xiao Mei, cos' she was really sad that she teared. First me, then Lay Hoon....and she left earlier than me. She treats both of us like her daughters, and with us gone, I hope aunt siew chun can take good care of her.

Anyway, on the brighter side, I thought of a nice gift for her. Something good for her diabetes. Thanks to Lina nana:), it was her brilliant idea.

Gonna miss the people here:(

The decision

2007-11-30T00:07:00.000+08:00

[No turning back]

Yes.

I have made the decision. And I should not look back.

But I can't stop my tears from falling, cos' it hurts to leave my children.
All my plans for them
My thoughts and dreams of seeing them graduate
The anticipation of the tears that will come when they graduate
Plans of improving their reading and writing
How I can improve my teaching to better their learning
Leading them to dance and perform
Gone. It feels like I abandon them.

I can't stop my tears from falling, cos' it hurts to leave the staff
Especially auntie
Whom I have already regarded her like my grandma
Even though she nags
Even though I was annoyed at her nags sometimes
At the end of the day
It is because she is like my family
That is why I show my annoyance to her
That is why she only nags at me, not other staff
Cos' only family
Will be comfortable enough to do such things
Moreover, how can I forget
The kindness and homely warmth feeling she made me feel
In the new cold environment
On my first day of work?

But no matter how much it hurts
In life there are always times where one have to leave
No matter how painful
No matter how sad
Yet your mind still tells you to leave
Even though your heart wishes to stay
Cos' this isn't about romance or only about passion
But more for your future and opportunities

I have been told countless times
Not to let my heart rule over my head
And give up good opportunities
That come by so easily and effortlessly
Especially when it is regarding
my future
my life

I guess I should really thank my mum
For her selfless love and decision
Solely thinking for me for my future
Being so thoughtful, resourceful and helpful
And being practical
Not emotional

But on the other hand
A tiny part of me wishes
Though it is an ungrateful wish
That she is not so thoughtful or helpful
Not so practical but more emotional
Then I won't be in this situation now.

Whatever it is
I have already made the decision
And I know even though it hurts badly
I have to leave.
Even though it is selfish of me
To abandon them
For my own future.

Maybe I am being to emo. Or just being a moron.

Difficult decision

2007-11-21T21:05:00.000+08:00

[Life is full of choices]

What should I do?
What will you do?
Will you choose your feelings, or will you choose shorter hrs and good money?

I am facing a dilemma...
Even though it hasn't surfaced yet.
But I know someday soon it will.

And when that day comes,
I will have to make THE decision.
I will have to make THE choice.
And not regret it.

Which is so hard.
The decision.
The choice.
The regret.

Sighz.

Stupid laptop

2007-11-13T22:25:00.000+08:00

[Many thoughts]

There are so many thoughts running through my mind now. Regarding work, life and love....oh! and my stupid laptop.

Well, let's start with my laptop. It was (still is at times, when it's working) my favourite laptop. It's small, it's light, it's compact, it's good(well, at least for a small and light laptop, it has the basic necessities) and it's Fujitsu. IT people told me it is the best brand for laptops, besides Toshiba of course.

That was why I bought it in the first place 2 years ago. At that point of time, Fujitsu was very very expensive. I bought mine at like, $2600+? From NUS no less, ok? By right it should be cheaper from schools. Which is true, at that point in time my laptop model was $3000+ outside...or so I was told by the Fujitsu people when I called them. Now, I think it is cheaper?

Well, it's quite gd, considering it is still working now, 2 years later. Alot of my friends' laptop isn't working much anymore.

Which is why I am worried recently. Cos' my stupid laptop is sooooooooooo slow at surfing net even though I have it reformatted zillion times and was consistently checked for virus. It was STILL running at snail's speed. I mean, I still love this laptop ok? Especially when my house computer broke down like, a year or so ago? It is practically my life. Like, my only means to complete the endless assignments and to the internet world.

It has accompanied me through my late nights of assignments, surfing net, and maple story. It follows me around in school and I am happy with carrying it cos' it's light with a big enough screen. And so I really do not wish to hurt my favourite laptop by calling it stupid.

But I can't help it. It's really frustrating surfing net now, especially what with the watching drama serials online for free. I mean, can you imagine watching a quarter of an episode of a drama serial which only lasts forty minutes, for close to an hour? This is so insane that I was so tempted to buy the serials rather than watch it for free!

So you see? Even though I love my laptop, I am so frustrated with it at times that I have to call it stupid or a turd(new word learnt from South Park). I really have a love-hate affair with my laptop.

Ok, I can't believe I crap so much about my laptop. Enough about it.

Let's talk about my love life. Everything is ok now. At least it seems so after I talked to him. Whatever it is, I just hope we can learn to forgive. Especially for him. And not bear a grudge. Yeah.

About work and life, I am just thinking about my future. I mean, I am torn into two. Part of me wants to stay in early childhood cos' it is my passion. Part of me can't bear the thought of being low income forever. I mean, low income plus long hours of work just doesn't make me feel like staying on, especially now that I am so broke.

I still haven't planned what I am going to do. If I am to leave, the only thing I can't bear is the children. I can't imagine working at a place without children, for that I mean preschool children, children from infant all the way to 6 years old. I really don't feel like teaching primary school children. They just kind of lost the innocence at primary school nowadays.

Oh wellz...just some random thoughts....

I just want to lead a happy and comfortable life. My miserable salary is considered low income, that even hawkers are earning more than me. And to think a factory worker now can earn more than me. Sighz.

That's enough of my rantings.

Heartbroken..

2007-10-31T23:51:00.000+08:00

[Feeling really down]

Really no mood. Some things have happened and I tried to ignore it. After all, it had happened in the past.

But with his not missing me, or finding me, or smsing me, or calling me on his own accord, plus attitude, moreover we had only seen each other one day for last wk, if he really loves me, absence make the heart fonder right?

Then why is he in such a nonchalent, never-see-me-also-won't-find-me attitude?

Is the vicious cycle beginning again?

I really don't feel like thinking anymore. I have been thinking too much. He, on the other hand, does not wish to think and hence did not come and find me...even though we don't see each other much.

Why doesn't he find me anymore?

So sick of crying and feeling alone. It feels like he is in army. Even though it makes it so much worse that he isn't.

Should learn to heck care, from him.

Dumbledore is gay

2007-10-28T12:56:00.000+08:00

[What is wrong with homosexuals?]

Ok. This is somewhat unexpected. I mean, Professor Dumbledore is like, my favourite character after Harry Potter and Severus Snape(Oh! Snape! *Sobs*) from my favourite book series.

But it doesnt make me like him any less. True, before reading the article which Rowling commented that Dumbledore is gay, I have never really tried picturing him with anyone.

I mean, I did question why he was not married, but I just felt probably it is cos' he was too powerful a wizard that he was something close to a celestial being or monk or priest or something (too religious or something), to get married or anything. You know, too devoted in doing greater good and hence did not want to get married, that sort of thing.

So this was somewhat unexpected. But I am not saying it feels wrong. It felt more weird than wrong. Cos'...if saying he was gay is making him so....humane. So common. So ordinary. Which was so not him. I mean, if you read the book, he was usually so....powerful in a grandfatherly celestial way.

Oh wellz. But I am ok with it, after the shock settled in. But what I really wonder is, why are there other readers not taking this too well? It's like they are anti-gays or something.

Which reminded me of a conversation I had with the gang(minus Andre). The guys were saying that they did not like gays. Gay is wrong, or something similar to that. Whatever the case is, the guys also could not stand lesbians. Well, cos' lesbians snatched all the pretty girls away, some of my guy friends said.

And reminded me of another hot topic of the town that the govt(might be wrong abt this) abolished the law of homosexuals engaging in sex is against the law (or something like that).

Well, to me, I am not against homosexuals. It is their own private biz and affair and lives. Like the law which alot of people are against (well I have heard dimwits saying on the radio shows that homosexuals is a mental problem), I mean, seriously, how is homosexuals having sex going to destroy our conservative Asian culture and turn it into a homosexual haven?

That was what some of these dimwits(I'm sorry to say that) said when a radio station asked the public for opinion. Most of them were so anti-homosexual, saying that if that law was abolished, it is going to create a huge problem cos' children will see homosexuals and learn "bad" things and Singapore will turn into homosexual haven blah blah...

Seriously people....

The law that was abolished, from what I understand, is talking about sexual acts between two people of the same sex? Now, how is abolishing that law going to change our lives? We all knew that there are gays and lesbians in Singapore for so long....you mean, before the abolishment of this law, NONE of them were engaging in sexual activities?

They were so law-abiding, that they did not have any sex at all? I don't think so. Just like any one of us, when they engaged in sexual acts, they would usually do it in their own private houses or at least away from public eye, and the police will not be so insane to catch them at their own homes or something, right??

Please lah...this law is as lame as the one which states anyone engaged in oral or anal sex is to be jailed (something like that). I mean, police won't be so free to knock door to door and ask whether you are engaged in this kind of activity, right? Of course, there are exceptional cases of that (probably cos' these people that were caught did not have the decency to do it in private).

But my point is, these are acts which people will usually do in private. I felt that whatever we did in private is our business. And if these things (homosexuals sex and oral sex) are done in private, how is that going to affect our society?

Now, you are going to ask, what if the homosexuals start having sex in public? This is going to affect our society blah blah...Think about it. If homosexuals are having sex in public, isn't it very discriminating for police to lock them because the law says people of the same sex should not do it? IF all of us straights are having sex in public, the police will lock us too, for indecent exposure, right? I mean, arent both cases the same thing? Then why charge the homosexuals something so different? It is already bad enough that they already face discrimination, they still have to go through the law to have sex.

They should face the same punishment as we do. No, some imbeciles might argue that cos' they are mentally unsound. Yeah, so if they are, let's say you are right, even the law treats the mentally unsound better, cos' they can get away with murder while the homosexuals can't even have sex in peace. So why humiliate the homos by having that kind of law? Isn't it good that the govt is now more democratic, realizing how humiliating it must be for them to be caught and that everyone can have equal rights, having sex with who they want etc...cos' ultimately, it's our own private affair, isn't it?

(This does not apply to those people who have the kinky interest in having sex in public)

Oh well...I am not fighting for gay rights or whatever, I am just fighting for an individual's freedom and privacy.

Enough of this ranting.

***************************************************

Anyway, yesterday I went for Erdinger Oktoberfest at Merchant Loop....and before that to Brewerks. It wasn't a very fun trip...I had no idea what happened, except that dear was not his usual self (you know, fun and silly), so when he wasn't his usual self...it affected me too. Just felt downright depressed.

Yeah...photos below....enjoy:)

At Brewerks...

Me and Fion:)

Me and Fion and Melissa:)

Us again:)

Dear and Kevin acting in....

"Gangs of Singapore."

Me...licking salt while drinking margarita(don't know is it spelled this way) lime.

At Erdinger Oktoberfest....

Cheers!

The danger of couple fights....(continued below)

is that...(continued below)

when the man gets angry, NEVER put a dangerous weapon near him...(continued below)

cos' one will never know what he can resort to...

Oh wellz, who ask girls to like bad boys? Or rather, why do I like bad boys?? Serves me right.

Bad boys have their sweet side too...

Our backs...

We had fun dancing though!

Group picture again...this year, Andre is missing:(

Oh wellz. It seemed like they still had fun despite of the missing Chan.

What is happening to us?

Bleh...such a belated entry

2007-10-09T22:58:00.000+08:00

[Collecting dust]

Yes. I know. My blog has been collecting dust. A lot of ppl telling me that they are giving up on coming my blog to read...cos' my blog is so full of dust and spiders are spinning their web on my blog...

Sorry ppl. I have been too busy with work, classes, yadda yadda. Well, you know. Studying and working make one busy Joyce.

Surprisingly, the only complain I saw on my tag was from Mr. D.

Anyway, since my blog is so full of dust, I also don't remember what I have promised from my previous entry:(. No wonder you ppl give up on me.

Well, instead of having a looong entry, I will just post photos...which are long overdue...but nonetheless, what I have promised...

My Kids-In-Charge event photos: The Process

Just some random photos of my K1 darlings...

The making of puppets for puppet show...

The end product - The 3D Puppet

Setting up of environment - The stage, the museum...

The wall murals! Drawn by the children, painted by the children and me!

My dear girl Joie insisted that she wanted to be in the photo despite the fact that she was supposed to be sleeping as it was the children's nap time.

The practice before the event...

The actual event on 24th August:

The show was a success!:)

Many thanks to Yu Pei for coming down and giving us support...

Lol. That was like, more than 1 month ago? The photos are about 1 month late, but nonetheless, I still decided to show off my k1 darlings. I had only uploaded a few photos out of my many photos...heh.

Anyway, up next are just some photos I took during the August feasting and Mel's birthday celebration...

Again they are like, more than 1 month late...pls bear with me.

August feasting at Mayim:

6 words to describe the food there: The food is DAMN NICE can?

Mel's birthday celebration at Seoul Garden(didn't even know they still exist):

Yeah, dear was there too:) And so coincidentally, I just realized we sat in front of a poster that said "Love at first sight". (Eh, even though ours wasn't love at first sight, but we still love each other nonetheless, so I said it was a coincidence, get the picture?)

There are more photos to be up...but for now I try not to promise anything just in case I am too busy and don't have time to upload all right?

Hmm...kind of missing some people recently...oh well. Can't wait for my degree course to be over.

Latest updates

2007-09-01T00:58:00.000+08:00

[So many things, or rather photos to update]

Heh...

Have been so busy...

KIC was a success, despite my worries about my presentation and children's performance...

The children had done well, and I am very proud of them:)

Of course, thanks to Yu Pei for coming down and support us...probably her words of encouragement helped? So I wasn't that nervous in the end...

All the hard work...stayed back at centre till 11 plus almost every night for a week before the KIC...

Now that it's over, I am busy with my assignments again...

Well, I was also very touched cos' alot of my children gave me presents for Teachers' Day...

Oh..and I have been tagged...but since I am making this a short entry, I will do the questions on my next entry, together with photos for KIC and showing some of my Teacher's Day presents:) So, stay tuned..heh.

Really love my K1 darlings:)

Oh, Happy Teachers' Day to all teachers, especially Early Childhood Educators!

Really thankful

2007-08-13T22:31:00.000+08:00

[Thank you, student teachers]

Time flies really fast.

I remembered they just came not long ago. Friendly and helpful, it is always nice to have another person around in your class to talk to, especially when you are alone without a partner.

I remembered a mixture of feelings, like how I was reminded of my own attachment days when I was still at Ngee Ann Poly, and other feelings like whether I could actually guide them just like how the form teacher that I was attached to guided me....

As time goes by, it seems like I am just having another friend around, always willing to assist me when I needed help...

Just when I am so used to having their presence around, they are to go....

It's kind of sad, yet at the same time blessed, to know these student teachers, as we can really click (I heard of cases which student teachers and form teachers can't work together at all) and most importantly, helped out so much willingly.

Especially Yu Pei, who has been so kind to have always come back to help out even though she has already completed her field practicum attachment. (I don't remember being so helpful when I was doing my attachment).

Thanks for being a friend, for the card and stickers, and all the help you have given me. Will definitely want to stay in touch:)

in love again

2007-08-11T03:04:00.001+08:00

[The Romeo of Harry Potter]

Warning: For those of you who didnt read the seventh book of Harry Potter won't understand this entry.

A lot of my friends who have read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows have asked me whether I have read it. Those who knew I am a fan.

Now I can proudly tell you people I did! I read it within 2 nights, and it's 2 hours per night:).

Anyway, this book made me cried harder than the previous books. This is bad cos' I did cry when I read the previous two books, namely Order of Phoenix and The Half Blood Prince cos' Sirius and Dumbledore died.

I mean, I cried for Sirius cos' I felt that he led a very sad life and died just like that. For Dumbledore, it's cos he is the hero and he is so grandfatherly, like Santa Claus, so when he died, it felt like Christmas without Santa, which just feels plain wrong.

But when I read the last instalment, I realized these characters paled in comparison to him, cos his life is more sad and he is as great a hero as Dumbledore can be.

Who is he?

Gone are the days of Romeo and Jack (from Titanic)....

I dub him the Romeo of Harry Potter series(actually I personally feel he is greater than Romeo).

He is none other than......Severus Snape.

I mean, I practically cried like I lost someone dear to me (ok, ok, I know, I am pathetic, it's only a story) when he died and that I learnt about how great he was.

He is not only the most misunderstood character in the story and perhaps in the modern world fiction, but he is one of the most devoted character as well.

I mean seriously, who doesn't love a good love story whereby the male character love this one woman since they were children till the day he died, despite the fact that she is someone his kind look down upon (she is a muggle, and he is brought up in a family who ostracizes mudbloods), that she hated him after one hurtful word he said and possibly never love him at all and married the person he hated the most?

Mind you, he is supposed to be this bad guy character at first...cos' he is fascinated by dark magic...however, he still loved the girl despite whatever she had done for many years, loving her so much that he chose the right path rather than the evil one when she died under the hands of evil, protecting her son (who is none other than Harry Potter) despite the fact that he hated her husband and her son?

To me, that's greater than Romeo or Jack from Titanic, cos' even though all of them have the common point of willing to die for the woman they love, Snape carried it one step further, he is willing to die for a woman who doesn't love him, married the guy whom he hated cos' he bullied him and possibly find him disgusting not to even be his friend again.

Oh well...those of you who didn't read the book won't understand what I was blogging about...I just had to blog about Harry Potter and Severus Snape.

He is now officially my most favourite character in the Harry Potter series, after Harry Potter himself:)

Misunderstandings.

2007-08-06T00:58:00.000+08:00

[I miss my best pals]

This is one of the times where I miss my best pals from school days
Miss them for accepting who I am
Knowing me and trusting me

With them I can voice out my thoughts
Do what I want
And even if the words come out wrong
Or my actions are so misleading
They know that whatever I say or do
Is not to harm them

Even when I make mistakes
Or when I do things that seem wrong
My best pals will always know that
I mean no harm

Many people told me work life is like a battle field
Where I can never really find a true friend
Cos' you can't trust your colleagues
Or even if you do they won't trust you totally
Cos' as long as you do something that is wrong
They will choose to leave you rather than be with you

I thought that is nonsense
Cos' I truly believe otherwise

I want to be more confident
And tried to speak out
For what I feel is right or wrong
Not to attack anyone and mean any harm

Maybe it's time
To just keep my mouth shut
Even if I feel something is wrong
Or when I feel something is not right
In the game of work

Because what I feel
Might be totally wrong to others
And only my closest best pals
Will truly understand
And forgive my mistakes

Cos' in the working world
People are not so understanding
As long as your opinion differs
As long as you voice your differences out
To other people

They are not going to trust you totally
No matter how close you can be

Somehow I have learnt
The good people in the game of work
Are supposedly the ones
Who never voice their thoughts
To anyone but themselves

I feel that it is safer this way
To be someone who only mind my own business
Cos' you will never know
What you have said or done
Is wrong in other people's eyes

And in the game of work
People aren't that understanding
Or that forgiving
And it's a place where I can't trust
To make mistakes
Or voice out my thoughts

I really do miss my best pals from school days
Whom I don't even have time to meet
But always trusting me
And allowing me to grow

Thank you, my pals.

The photo again...

2007-08-06T00:01:00.000+08:00

[The Mickey and Minnie]

I decided to put this photo cos' some of my friends who read my previous entry suggested that maybe I should take a photo with the BIG Mickey and Minnie to just prove my point rather than describing it....

Some of them seem to think I am too long-winded, which I also feel I am...

There:

Me and Mickey and Minnie

And also, I would like to thank all the people who had given me presents (the accessories, clothes and hair band scarfs). I didn't take photos of all the other presents cos' there are quite a number of them, but even so I appreciate all the presents given to me. So thank you all once again:)

Reminded of his love

2007-08-05T01:35:00.000+08:00

[A blessing to have your love reciprocated]

It was my birthday yesterday....and I was once again reminded that he loves me. Well, even though he didn't say the words, but his actions meant it. Actions speaks louder than words, aye?

Anyway, despite the fact that he didn't get much sleep the night before my birthday, in fact, he didn't sleep the whole night cos' he was playing games with his friends, he still went out with me without a word of complain.

Too bad both of us forgot to bring our cameras cos' he treated me to Teppanyaki, which I had never been to before (yeah, I know, I am quite back-dated right?), and the food is tasty. We also went the Coffee Club for desserts, and the national day dessert is delicious.

Well, it was a nice day out full of laughs, and he made me laugh most of the time, despite the fact that he did not sleep much the day before.

Funny thing is, he told me his present for me is SO BIG (he stretched his arms wide to prove his point) and I thought he got me some sort of cabinet or cupboard.

I was so touched when I saw the present:
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

Enormous Mickey and Minnie Mouse!!

Why was I touched? Well, it's cos' firstly, I am so happy that he remembered his promise for me so many years back...I forgot exactly when, if I am not wrong it was during our secondary school days, when he told me he would get a VERY VERY BIG soft toy for me when he has the money, since it doesn't come cheap and he knows I like them so much (only teddy bears and Mickey mouse).

Secondly, it's cos' he still remembers that I like Mickey mouse! I mean, I have liked Mickey mouse and anything that are related to Disney(think the Disney princesses) except Winnie the Pooh. But of course, Mickey is my favourite cos' he is not only cute, but he is the symbol that represent Disney what.

I have sidetracked. My main point is, I only mentioned it once or twice throughout the entire 8 years that we are together, and he remembered it. And there is Minnie too! It's like symbolising both of us together, holding hands:), and knowing him, I think that is the reason why he chose to buy this instead of just buying a BIG Mickey.

AND this enormous Mickey and Minnie comes together, and they can hold hands(there are velcros on both their hands so that I can stick them together).

If you can't really tell how big it is through the photos, Mickey and Minnie's palms are bigger than mine, and their feet is bigger than mine too.

So I hereby announce that my bed is FULL of soft toys, all from him. Mickey and Minnie is like, the seventh soft toy from him.

Hehe, so this is a rough account of how I spent my birthday:) It is always a blessing to be reminded that the person you love loves you. It is even more joyful to be reminded of it on your birthday, cos' it is the best kind of birthday present ever.

********************************************************

-Anyway, dear, if you are reading this, thank you for everything that you have done, including the things that you have done for me on my birthday:)

SO gross!!!

2007-08-03T23:26:00.000+08:00

[Some contents of this entry is not for the weak hearted]

Well...if you have a weak heart or more like, a weak stomach, or BOTH....my advise to you is...

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT click on the url below...

http://www.stevenlim.net/

I tell you. This man, is an embarassment to himself, Singapore, and men around the world.

I was contemplating on whether I should blog about him....but really, his actions are SOOOOO attention-seeking+perverted+so full of himself that I really really can't stand it, so I decided to let some of my friends, who are sadly(blessed, I mean) clueless about this embarassing imbecile that we have in Singapore.

He is an embarassment not so much on his attention-seeking nature and perverted look that he always has on his face, but his twisted mind of thinking that he is so much of a hunk that girls are fighting over him...and thus, some of his entries on how he doesnt want to bed girls when they throw themselves at him. He is SO FULL of himself, I think his brains are so full of himself too, too full and filled up that there is NOTHING ELSE in his brains.

His whole website features not only photos but videos of HIM, HIM, and more HIM. Doing dances and singing when it is really not his thing. It is fine, if he is really keen on singing and stuff, BUT does he has to be so arrogant AND ALMOST ALWAYS HALF-NAKED throughout the whole video? And mind you there are alot of videos that he filmed about him.

And his Engrish, oops, I mean English, is so fantastic that people made a video about it. You can watch it at youtube:

A man of "classics"

This is a video made by a blogger name Jayden. It is hilarious, that is, for those of you who know about the famous Xiaxue and her famous entry on the top 7 most digusting bloggers in the Singapore blogosphere. Cos' Steven Lim the Hunk(not Hulk, though he does look more like The Hulk than The Hunk) rebuked back at Xiaxue by making a video(featuring him, him and only him) scolding all kinds of interesting vulgarities.

So, being a normal human being, I guess Jayden, like the rest of us normal beings, can't stand his actions and decided to make the funny video above.

WHY, those of you will ask, do I bother to read about him when he is SOOO disgusting? Reason is simple.

Even though he is disgusting, got the kind of perverted look, have perfect Engrish (I mean, English), attention-seeking and really thinks that he is The ~~Hulk~~ Hunk, I read him because sometimes, his actions make me feel gross yet tickled to the point of rolling on the floor and laugh.

Another reason is, I just cannot fathom why he is like this. I have never encountered another individual like him in my life. So everytime I read his website to not only see his silly yet disgusting antics, but also to figure out WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH HIM?

AND the weirdest thing is, he is also very very contradicting. I don't know is it because of his superb Engrish, I mean, English, that he is so contradicting, but well, he is so contradicting that I don't know what he is thinking. Read his recent entry on his insults of Xiaxue and how much he hate her, then read his current entries on the 2 inspector stories that he created (yes, he not only blogs and video blogs, he attempts to write novels too, on his website), which seemed to show that he likes her. DOTS.

Anyway, those of you brave hearted people or so-curious-that-you-don't-give-a-damn-about-my-warning and went ahead to look at his website, hope you did not vomit your dinner or whatever meals that you have taken, or worse, have a heart attack. In any case, you have been warned:)

-To the brave people, you should view all his videos, especially the one where he scolded all kinds of vulgarities about Xiaxue, then you will get the funny joke about Jayden's remake about her. I dare you to. Hehe:)

Love this song...

2007-07-30T21:20:00.000+08:00

["Do you know? The ping pong song" sung by Enrique Iglesias]

Do you know?
Do you know?
Do you know?

Do you know what it feels like loving someone
That's in a rush to throw you away?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one
To know the lock on the door has changed
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)

If birds flying south's a sign of changes
At least you can predict this every year
Love, you never know the minute it ends
Suddenly I can't get it to speak

Maybe find you all the things it took to save us
I could fix the pain that bleeds inside me
Look in your eyes 'til I see there's something about me
I'm standing on the edge and I don't know what else to give

Do you know what it feels like loving someone
That's in a rush to throw you away?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one
To know the lock on the door has changed?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)

How can I love you? How can I love you?
How can I love you? How can I love you?
If you just don't talk to me, babe.

I flow through my act, there's a question, "Is she needed?"
Another side of a man I cannot be
Looking at the last 3 years like I did
I could never see us ending like this

(Do you know?)
Seeing your face no more on my pillow
Is a scene that's never happened to me
(Do you know?)
But after this episode I don't see
You can never tell how the next day of life could be

Do you know what it feels like loving someone
That's in a rush to throw you away?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one
To know the lock on the door has changed?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)

Do you know what it feels like loving someone
That's in a rush to throw you away?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one
To know the lock on the door has changed?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)

Do you know?
Do you know?
Do you know?
Do you know?

Do you know what it feels like loving someone
That's in a rush to throw you away?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one
To know the lock on the door has changed?
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)

Do you know what it feels like loving someone
(You don't know how it feels)
That's in a rush to throw you away?
(You don't know how it feels)
Do you know what it feels like to be the last one
(You don't know how it feels)
To know the lock on the door has changed
(You don't know how it feels)
(Do you know? Do you know? Do you know? Do you?)

Do you know?
Do you know?
Do you know?
Do you know?

************************************************

I really like this song and the lyrics of this song. It's so addictive listening to it, and I like the music and of course, Enrique's voice. I like it so much that I made it my blog song.

-Do you know what it feels like loving someone who seem to care more about another girl's life than yours? He always says he doesn't love her. Then why bother about her life? It makes me so confused.

What a day...

2007-07-29T02:05:00.000+08:00

[My Saturday]

Well...it started with some hiccups...which I would say, I contributed to the conflict too. You know, when there are disappointments, and add that with my hot temper....I definitely play a part whenever we have arguments.

But I am glad things between me and dear is ok now:)

Then we had a fun time after the hiccup, going to farm mart, and Qian Hu fish farm. Oh, and we watched Knocked Up too. It was quite hilarious.

I would say it was a fun Saturday. Until I saw the final assignment that is supposedly due on Monday.

Initially I thought I can do it on Sunday. I still can do it tomorrow, BUT now I have a nagging doubt that I can't finish it.

WHY??? You will ask.

Cos' when I opened the document just now, and saw the parts that I was assigned to do (cos' it's a group project), I almost fainted.

I DON"T KNOW HOW TO DO IT!!!!!!!

Well, at least a lot of it I don't seem to understand, much less go about doing it.

So THAT is freaking me out.

I am SOOOO dead.

Photos taken from Tioman

2007-07-20T00:06:00.000+08:00

[My 100th entry]

It's official!

As I logged in, I saw that I have 99 posts....

So it means that....

This is my no. 100 entry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry about the late entry though...I was actually thinking of uploading last week...but I was too busy and lazy to blog this entry, cos' stupid photobucket is taking so bloody long to load when I was uploading the Tioman photos...

Anyway, coincidentally, this 100th entry is dedicated to some photos taken from Tioman trip with him, I didn't want to upload all cos' some are meant to be confidential:), and also the fact that we didnt take too many photos cos' there were only 2 of us.

(Well Dylan, here are the Tioman trip photos! NAH! LOL...). FINALLY right?? Well here goes:

On the ferry ride to Salang....

Well, I love this photo. Cos' dear looked so happy here. I have never taken a photo with him looking so SMILEY and cute:) And throughout the ferry ride he was like "Are we there yet?"(inside joke, think Shrek2)

Lunch time...

Well, this was taken once we reached Salang. We reached there at about 2 plus in the afternoon? We were famished.

As we were walking around...

We spot this! Or rather dear spot it first. He was like, "What is that? Crocodile I think!" Well, up till today, I still have no idea what was that. I just randomly gave him an answer, which was an iguana.

Another one...

Well, he spot this...

And he wanted to sit on it. Like a you zai xian zai(translation:relaxing) lifestyle. Must blend in with the culture there.

The scenery...

Yeah, of course me, but since scenery is the focus, even if you can't see me it's ok.

Another one..

This time with dear...

Well, we went on this Round Island Trip that cost about rm80. Eh, actually dear was very nice. He only wanted to go for the Coral Island Trip, which cost rm60, which only consists of snorkelling trip around Coral Island...while the Round Island trip is like all around Tioman Island, where there is not only snorkelling, but visiting other places...like the other beaches and waterfall.

So because I said the Round Island trip seemed more worth it, he agreed to go to the Round Island trip instead. Eh, I think the Coral Island trip will be more fun, cos' there is less travelling needed to be done. We spent alot of time travelling on the speed boat for the Round Island trip, cos' we were to travel around the island ma, so duh!

We didn't get to take photos of the snorkelling trip though:( cos' we didn't have the underwater camera thingy. But it was er...scary for me at first (I think I am hydrophobic, even with life jacket). Dear was nice about it though, he even dived into the sea and picked one of the sea cucumber up from the sea bed so that I get to touch it.

To me, it looks like a piece of shit. Of the black colour variety.

Anyway, for the Round Island trip, we went to the waterfall. Took some photos there...

Me and dear:)

Myself...the water was freezing. Sharp contrast to the hot weather.

Us again..

Someone helped us take the photos...and this one was taken with us caught unawares...

Me at the waterfall...Like I said, the water WAS freezing cold. So I wasn't particularly fond of posing under the waterfall.

Dear seemed to like posing at the waterfall though:)

Dear was happily waddling in the water...seriously, he is good at swimming, good enough to dive into the water and swim like a fish, and sometimes, like a dog, silly but cute:)

Lastly...this is the last photo that we took before we left..

Nice clear water with tiny fishes right?

I really like the place. It is really a relaxing place to go to, as the lifestyle there reminds me of kampong life...but quite a modern one at that cos' the resorts there, though built to look like kampongs, most of them are air conditioned. So it is really different from Singapore's busy and fast paced lifestyle. Quite a good place for a really relaxing getaway, and is quite cheap at that.

I heard Phuket is even better, so that is my next goal destination, though it is much more expensive:). So if you are looking for a really serene place to relax and getaway from the hectic lifestyle of Singapore and with quite a tight budget, Tioman is a good choice:).

Enough on Tioman...

********************************************

Just another photo that me and dear took on a KTV trip before andre sets off to Perth...

Eh, there are other photos, but they are with dear's friend. When he sent it to us, I will probably upload the rest:)

Enough about photos......

********************************************

Harry Potter and the deathly hallows is out. I MUST HAVE IT. I mean, those of you who know me well should know I am a big fan of Harry Potter. I like, have ALL the books and ALL the vcds of the movies. So definitely, I watched Order of Phoenix already. I would say it is good and bad, good considering that the fifth book is really thick, and they managed to put almost all the important plots inside.

Bad as in, like I said, almost all the important plots are inside. I still think that they seriously overlooked one character, who will be very very important in the last two instalments of the Harry Potter series. The character is Ginny Weasley. Those of you who are not fans of Harry Potter, I am spoiling this for you.

Ginny is important BECAUSE she will be his girlfriend and wife in the last two books. She is, in the books(at least from fifth book onwards), very pretty, so much so that even Malfoy thinks she is pretty and that due to her beauty she is popular among guys and thus changed lots of boyfriends, AND very witty, humorous, smart and a strong person(she doesn't break down and cry easily, unlike Cho, so that is why Harry like her over Cho in the end).

But in this movie Ginny doesn't seem to display much of the above mentioned traits, does she? Oh well...let's hope that in the future movies she is going to have more constructive and witty lines, and that by some miracle, turn into a beauty(cos' seriously, I don't really find the current actress who is acting as her very pretty).

Besides Order of Phoenix, I watched Transformers too. Some of my friends tell me that they never know how attractive robots can be, or that they have fallen in love with Optimus Prime or Bumblebee.

For me, not to be arrogant or what, let's just say that I have been in love with Optimus since I was say, eight years old? I like to watch the cartoons, and even have a toy model of Optimus, which is sadly, given away:(. I like Transformers probably due to the fact that I like to play with transportation toys(I like cars and trucks, basically land transports) besides barbie dolls.

Like I said, part of the theme song that I remembered from the cartoon was transformers, robots in disguise. Up till today, I still have no idea whether I was right or not, cos' I was so young then. Any fans out there who knows whether the words are like that?

Like I mentioned before, if those are not the exact words, I have remembered the wrong words for half of my life:X.

Well, enough about my childhood love for Optimus and transformers. Blame it on my nostalgia:X

- Tranformers, robots in disguise.

Seems ok now

2007-07-17T23:21:00.000+08:00

[To people who are concerned..]

Oh wellz....

I really want to thank the people who are here for me during my sad moments...

The people who helped me emotionally and financially....and those who are concerned about my last two entries (or rather sad poems) or the fact that the blog I dedicated to him is gone....

I am fine:). At least he seemed to be treating me ok now. Perhaps it is the presence of Dylan. Though I didnt tell him much about him.

Anyway, was thinking of uploading the photos for Tioman trip today. Then I looked at the time and realized that it is getting late...really want to sleep earlier today. Not much photos though...cos' there are only two of us....

So people who are interested, I will most probably be uploading tomorrow:)

Disappear...once again

2007-07-12T07:17:00.000+08:00

[Missing]

Time and again
He is gone
Not finding me
Not missing me

Just cos' he is upset
Just cos' he is angry
Just cos' he is busy

When I need him the most
Where is he?
Who is he missing?
Definitely not me.

If he misses me
His actions doesnt show it
Cos' once again he is missing in my life
When I am calling out for him
In my heart.

Time and again
When he goes missing
I will find him
And he knows he is missed

Regardless of how
Regardless of why
Regardless of how hurt I feel
I still miss him

So time and again
I look for him
When he goes missing
When he doesnt want to talk to me

Maybe he is hurting too
Maybe he misses me too
Maybe he wants to find me too
Maybe, maybe.

All my guesses
All his words
All his actions
Doesnt show that way

This time maybe
I am too tired of this
One sidedness that I feel
This searching and finding

This sadness that I feel
This hurt that I have
This crying in my heart
The guesses in my mind

Living for myself
Not caring where he is
Or where his heart lies
Or who he is missing
Not bothering him
Actually feels
A sense of relief
A weight lifted off my chest
For not holding on anymore
And taking things in my stride

2007-07-08T20:13:00.000+08:00

[At least he is mine to call]

How do you convince yourself that he loves you?

Through his words....or through his actions?

It is tiring to keep guessing....

But his actions speaks louder than his words....

Is interested in her life....
The desire to help her when she needs help...
Even if it meant lying to someone whom he claimed to love...
Even if it meant hurting the person whom he claimed to love...
He perserveres till the last resort....
Looking at her like she is so beautiful...
Keeping her photos even though she didnt give it to him...
His words rang into my ears from long ago "I cant forget her, though I don't love her"

God knows what's more?

But just by all these actions, it is hurtful enough.
How do you feel secure with someone like him?
I would love to believe him, trust him.
But again and again his actions seemed to prove otherwise.
Is it my fault to be not trusting?

I should try not to make anymore wild guesses...
but can you tell me how?
when his actions really seemed otherwise?

Or maybe, it is not what it seems?
That perhaps things are not what they look like...
His actions may look like he cares a lot for her,
But it is perhaps just.....

For memory's keepsake,
Helping a friend in need,
Caring for an old friend,
It's all in the past.

I wish I will stop making wild guesses,
I guess there are too many things I don't know,
Making me wonder.

To end my misery,
Perhaps I should believe him,
Cos' after all, no matter what,
His best pal's golden words to me:
"At least he is mine to call".

Busy wks....

2007-07-04T00:04:00.001+08:00

[Stress overwhelms me]

It's been quite some time since I last blogged....So much things have happened...Went to KL and Tioman...

KL was not very fun, though I made a new friend, whom I would never have been closed to, if not for dear. Really, even though it's a very bad experience with him cos' we quarreled, not over her lah, I will tell more about what she did to piss me off. But over another person, who is now, surprisingly, one of my good friend. I remembered telling Fion we (the new gd friend I have made during the KL trip and me) will never be good friends, which will be if me and him never quarrel.

Well, whatever. It is better to have one more friend than an enemy.

Tioman was quite good. We enjoyed each other's company, teasing, joking, talking and strolling. We laughed and had some really candid shots, and the scenery is not bad(will upload when I get the photos from him). I suffered minor sun burn....so minor that it's not only not red or peeling, but it is only on a tiny spot on two sides of my shoulders....Think dear wasnt as lucky...he's got some minor burns behind his back.

Well, who asked me not to bring sunblock...cos' you see I have never suffered a burnt before in Singapore no matter how hot it was, even during my St. John days where we have to march and stand in the sun for long hrs in the stupid uniform that doesn't absorb sweat. YES, I don't apply any sunblock when I go beach as well nor anywhere outdoors in Singapore. So sunblock is an alien object for me....

Too ya-ya la, should not be so "smart-aleck" next time....Shall invest in one if I ever go to the beach in Tioman or hopefully, Redang.

Yup...so on the whole trip is fun...Tioman is a very very good place to relax. Cos' it feels so stress free, I don't feel like coming back here....everything is at such a slow pace, and we stayed at Salang, where everything feels like the old Kampong days....minus snakes and stuff....resort is facing the beach, even though we didnt stay in the one with sea view, but it's like 2 mins walk away from the beach so it doesnt matter.

But good things do not last....as I came back here to face the reality, there are some problems at home....

And work wise, I have too much work on my hand....assignments, Kids-In-Charge event, Parents-teachers conference, Open House, PEPS programme.

Kids-In-Charge aka. KIC itself is so stressful. Lots of things await me to do. Making of puppet theatre, puppets, scripts, lots of scribing and documentation....UGH!!!

I really have no confidence to finish it all. And do a good job. So much stress that it really overwhelmed me and smacked me right in the face. *PIAK*

***********************************************

On the other hand, about her that piss me off....

He finally stop giving her sister tuition. Cos' he knows how much I mind. Sweet right?

Now, tell me, what business is it of hers to ask him is it cos' of me????? Not only that, she told him that he can trust her and tell her one.

First, I am pissed cos' she has no business asking my boy this kind of thing. Second, WHY IS IT THAT SHE IS SOOOO GOSSIPY AND KPO??? I mean, why do she need to ask is it cos' of me? How she knows about it in the first place, and even so, why she has to butt in into OUR affair?

Oh, don't give me the crap that she is concerned about me. MY FOOT! It can't be cos' she is concerned about him cos' that is the only question she asked. And asked cos' her sister is dying to know why???

Then they are both KPO. And then somemore still tell him not to worry, can tell her. WHAT, she is his best friend is it? And what, she thinks he will NOT TELL ME WHAT A GOSSIP SHE IS?

Either she just loved to be KPO and gossip about it (that he stopped tuition cos' of ME) or she just loved to relish gleefully to the fact THAT I MIND, and that my boy is doing this kind of thing probably cos' she thinks he still have feelings for her. Or maybe both. Whatever. In any case, it's not her FUCKING business.

So what if I sound like I am jealous? So what if I mind? At the end of the day he cared for my feelings more than her and her sister anyway. So, I am going to stop feeling pissed, just want to share this interesting fact with you. That, he called her a gossip queen after this situation. So Fion, it's not you this time, if you are reading this.

Really you know. Some people will never change. She was like that since secondary school. Like I say, she could be mean to people she doesn't like. When I say mean, it's really mean. Those kind of put you down and make you feel small kind of making fun.

Lucky, I have friends who stood by me. Enough about HER.

************************************************

Dear told me we are watching Transformers tomorrow...don't know who is going except Mike. I want to watch!!! One of my favourite cartoons when I was young besides X-men etc...that theme song from the cartoon I can still remember.... I can't wait to see my favourite Optimus Prime & Bumblebee!!!!Hee...Oh well...it's getting late...I gotta go...will upload Tioman photos soon....

Transformers, robots in disguise. (Think in my memory it sounds like this, probably it's wrong...haha. But I always chant it this way. If it is wrong, I was wrong for more than half of my life:X)

the games fanatic

2007-06-11T22:22:00.000+08:00

[I love my psp!]

I really do! And not because Sony paid me advertising fee (I wish!) to say that. I am really addicted to my psp.

Well, before psp, what I really wanted to get was the nintendo ds lite. I mean, I always thought I am a game boy fan, or rather, a nintendo fan....

AND besides, even till now, I still think the design of the nintendo ds lite is prettier than the psp. Which was the reason I want to get the ds lite in the first place....BECAUSE it does look so much more compact and prettier....especially the white and ice blue one...in comparison the psp look so much more bigger and not to mention bulky as well....

So I never thought I would like psp until I got myself one....despite alot of games fanatics telling me that nintendo ds lite have better games, I never regret having mine....solely due to two reasons....they are...

GRAPHICS and RPG games!

The psp's graphics are soooo cool....so life-like....compared to ds lite's...it's a matter of personal opinion...but really, I do feel that despite the fact that ds lite has TWO screens...the graphics that it shows just somehow don't have the real life-like experience you get in psp...perhaps it's because the psp has a bigger screen.

AND this fact is great for me cos' I am an RPG game fanatic! I didn't know how much I prefer games like ultimate alliance, ghost rider etc where I will get to be one of the characters (from movies that I like) and go through different adventures. It's almost like I AM the characters I play(ok, that may sound psychotic to some), but it is fun and it does help that the scenes, sounds and characters look real.

I am not saying that ds lite don't have this kind of games or it's graphics sucks, but really, if you really like games whereby you get to be the character and have the "movie-like" experience, you should go for psp. Somehow probably due to the screen size...I don't know...

You see for yourself...

I think that the reason that psp has to have better graphics cos' it can watch movies as well?

AND it was PSP that made me realize that actually, all along I prefer playing playstation more than gameboy, just that I am too lazy to set it up and keep it (cos' I own a PS2 and my dad insisted we keep everytime we take out to play). Since I am not so much of a game fanatic, I make do with playing pokemons on my gameboys...

Now that I have a choice, since I am more into RPG and that neither am I a super mario/pokemon fan nor am I a super game fanatic in which I always finish playing my games so fast that I have to buy new games every time, psp suits me just fine. (Cos' people who said ds lite is better have told me cos' it has more varieties of games AND it has more girly games compared to psp, who has more sports games and mainly RPG games, unlike the variety ds lite offers.)

Well, like I said, I am fine with that. Cos' I am a very 'visual' person...so graphics are important to me in game play. I just love the "movie-like" experience I have every time I play:) And ds lite's dual screen does look confusing to me. I can't really multi-task(or multi-focus) so dual screen is of no use to me.

Probably if I have spare cash (which is not often), I will get ds lite too. Hehe.

I can't believe I have blogged so much crap on psp and ds lite....well....here are the games I have bought....

1) Pirates of the Caribbean: At world's end.

2)Ghost rider

3)Ultimate Alliance

4)Sims 2

5)Final Fantasy.

They are soooo fun, and I haven't completed any of it yet, just at different levels in each of them. Cos' where got sooooo much time to play????

I can play finish the ones I own is already a huge success for me...so really, even though psp does not have the variety that nintendo ds lite has, I am unable to finish their games what.

Ok, enough on that.

****************************

Amidst of my assignments and work stuff...I am going on a holiday! Two holidays, to KL and Tioman in fact, really hope I will enjoy them. Will definitely upload the photos once I return! And I am not going to use blogger image again...so bloody stupid and slow. And duno what is wrong with photobucket.

Gotta use other resources!

Marriage

2007-06-04T22:34:00.000+08:00

[The death of the love...and sparks]

Recently I have heard a disturbing news from my mum. I used to have fantasies about what a marriage should be like. You know, as I love fairytales. However, I have grown up ever since....and stopped believing in it, though I do wish occasionally that I have a happily-ever-after marriage.

But really. To hear a seemingly perfect marriage coming to an end....it is disturbing. After all, even though it is just one of the many cases I have heard...this time it is disturbing as it is very close to me....

Have you heard of a woman who tolerated her husband's betrayal and not coming home at all for the past year, and not even making noise about it?

A woman who silently washes her husband's clothes everyday without fail, despite the fact that he did not come home for the whole night, only to return home in the morning so that she can wash his clothes?

A woman who devotes all her love and care for her children and still, her husband, so she HELPED him keep mum about his not coming home and having an affair, in hope that he will love her again?

A woman who love her husband so much that she takes her husband's verbal and emotional abuse (think shouting and screaming at the wife), even though he is absent most of the time in the marriage?

A husband, who told her that he hates her, and wanted to divorce her and say to her "I don't want the children and I am not going to pay for them cos' you want it" like as if he is not the father?

AND ultimately, despite having to be his maid, taking in his verbal abuse, keeping mum about his affair by not telling his family (cos' he told her not to, if not he would hate her), neglecting his own children......how about ASKING HER TO PAY HIS CREDIT CARD BILLS that amount to thousands????

It is real. Not some drama serial. It happened in my family. And they were together for a long time before they got married, so the affair was a shock to everyone. I am not disclosing who exactly they are, but it is a shock as everyone thought their marriage is fine since....she never complained!

If not for my aunt's continuous pestering when she realized how weak and pale she was....she will probably suffer from depression.

In any case, I already hate and despise MCPs (Male Chauvinist Pigs) Those really big on I-AM-A-MAN-SO-I-CAN-ORDER-YOU-AROUND-COS-YOU-ARE-A-WOMAN kind really disgusts me.

Now, it is a combination of the three kinds of man I hate most!!! A MCP + A betrayer+Living off a woman MAN! (Ok, there are another two more kinds of guys I hate most, which are the rapists and the paedophiles)

AND I don't know whether I should slap the husband or the wife. He is seriously one of the lousiest husbands alive, and not to mention MCP to the limit (can you imagine at this day there is still a man who waits for his wife to serve him dinner if not he CANT AND REFUSE to eat???), and she still does not want him to hate her????

AND she still wants to seek reconciliation, pay off his debts, and washed his clothes, cooked for him (if he ever comes home once in a blue moon), can you imagine at this day there is a woman still like a traditional meek wife????

So it is a difficult choice. Really. Don't know to slap the wife to wake her up or kick the husband's balls. Eww...don't know whether he has AIDS or not.

But I was seriously mad when I heard it. If not for the fact that she is quite poor thing enough...I would also like to slap her. He is obviously enjoying the fact that he can bully her!!!!!!!! He is not respecting her at all. What with spending his money on the mistress and bringing the children to meet the mistress. GOSH!

UGH! So angry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And there is nothing to do to help her cos' she is going to be upset if anything happen to her husband. Talk about selfless love. This is overdoing it. And I thought I was too giving to my boy.

But this real life account did dampen my mood to the extent that I am having second thoughts about marriage. In this modern times, there is no such thing as marriage is forever.

So....Hai...the stupid things women do for the men that they love....enough of that.

***********************

On brighter note, I am going to watch......................Pirates again!!!!!!!!!!!Muahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!Ya, ya, I know I have already dedicated like past two entries to it....so I am just letting you guys know, that I am a happy happy girl when I think about watching Pirates again cos' I get to see Johnny Depp again!!

That's all for now.....Ta-ta!

Just realize something...

2007-05-31T14:35:00.000+08:00

[Movie review...]

Looking at my previous entry, I just realized that I must do this entry too....

As you guys know my favourite movie is "Pirates of the Caribbean".... I realize I should do a movie review on it!!!

I have watched the latest instalment..."Pirates of the Caribbean: At world's end"....

And my review is.....
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IT'S BLOODY NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FIVE STARS! BEST AMONG THE THREE!

Well, actually to me, all three is equally nice, except perhaps the Dead Man's Chest, cos' Captain Jack died in it......

Nonetheless....that is my review(haha! short and sweet huh?). I won't disclose further information cos' YOU are supposed to watch it yourself!

AND PLEASE STAY AFTER THE MOVIE! THERE ARE MORE FOOTAGE!!!

Cos' idiotic me, such a true blue fan, did not know about that! I mean, logically I should know cos' the past few have more footage after the credits...but I was too tired that day to think straight about staying back...just want to go home and sleep as I feel so contented after watching such a nice movie.

After that, I kept having a nagging feeling. I realize why when someone in my class asked me whether I stayed after the credits. Though I was real glad the footage had nothing to do with Captain Jack (so I was damn relief), but still...as a true blue fan...it's really...

DAMN IT!

So, yeah, GO WATCH IT AND STAY AFTER THE CREDITS!!

- "Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me!"

Pirates of the Caribbean!

2007-05-29T20:50:00.000+08:00

[Favourite actor in favourite movie..]

Aha! Those of you who know me...not necessary must know me very well....but know me enough...will definitely know what my favourite movie is....

If you don't know, my favourite movie is....... "Pirates of the Caribbean". Yup, all three trilogies of it...

It doesn't hurt that it starred.......................Johnny Depp (Full name: John Christopher Depp II), my favourite actor of all time!!!!

Well, actually, I first started watching the movie because of him. At that time, I didn't know Pirates of the Caribbean is going to be nice. I just watch "The curse of the black pearl" cos 1) I am a movie fanatic 2) Cos' of Johnny Depp, and a little cos' of Orlando Bloom (You see, it's about that time when LOTR was showing, and Orlando aka. Legolas was HOT.)

Well, ever since I saw Johnny Depp aka. Captain Jack Sparrow, I am hooked. Cos' it's already good enough to watch a movie starring my favourite actor, but it turned out that the character he is acting as is soooooooooooo fun! Really, if this movie is done without him, it's most probably not going to be as successful as it is now. Cos he is the star of the show. He just stole the limelight away from Orlando...

Now...I am not going to start a Johnny-Depp-is-better-than-Orlando entry. Because, for me, Johhny Depp IS better than Orlando Bloom. There is no need to start an argument whatsoever. In terms of talent, and looks...I feel that Johnny Depp is the guy. So that is all it matters....

I mean, Orlando is cute and handsome....that's all....I recalled writing an entry few months back about the actors that I find handsome and he is one of them....(of course Johnny Depp was mentioned first), but for this entry, let me just dedicate once again why I like Johnny Depp (besides his looks la!) so much.....

Besides looking so handsome, Johnny is also a talented actor and he was a rock musician, as a guitarist. Well...he started out as a rock band musician (won't bore you with the details) but something happened and Nicholas Cage was the one who advised him to be an actor.

His talent in acting has always been quite hidden ever since his first successful movie Edward Scissorhands...it was since then I like him. He always acts in movies that he finds that he can explores the character with (characters with depth)...not popular movie figures. He wants to be taken as a serious actor, so when he got popular from acting in an action drama serial during his twenties due to girls worshipping him for his looks and considering him as a teen idol, he felt that he was ruined and he really wanted to escape from his pretty boy image.

Call me weird, but I find that attractive for an actor. A good-looking actor who doesn't want people to go notice him for his looks. Guess we won't get to see him in any superhero action movie. What a waste, I feel he can act as a very convincing and good-looking vampire or something...

Hence, that is probably the reason why that though he has acted in so many movies before, his diverse acting talent is not very known to people...so I am going to show some pictures to let you see what are some of the movies that he has acted in, and some of which is not very well-known...Of cos' I am not going to put all the pictures of the movies that he had acted in...just some that show his diversities...

So enough (and pardon me) for the gushings...I am letting the pictures talk now...

Of course! The most recent one....Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow....

What about the past???
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Woo! The show that made him so popular among the girls....and made him a teen idol! Show called Jump Street 21.

"Girls think I'm good looking"

"Hmm, maybe being a teen idol aka. pretty boy is not good at all...in the long run"

"Ok, I want to be taken seriously as an actor. I don't want to be just a pretty boy anymore. No more conventional roles for me"

Muahaha, of course the dialogue is typed by moi. Continuing....his drastic change:
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"Edward Scissorhands"...the movie which I watched long ago and started liking him...Ironically, I find him cute here.

"Now I don't look like the typical pretty boy anymore aye? Must thank Tim Burton. Whoever still says I am handsome I will cut his or her head off. "

"Charlie and the chocolate factory"...

"Girls, still find me handsome or not? Still find me look like a pretty boy ah????!!! Ok, I will show you my talent in the next one!"

"Before Night Falls"...

"Give you this movie ah! I am also a girl aka. transvest now! Like me lah, like some more!"

"Sleepy Hollow"...

"ok, sometimes, also need to revert back to my original looks...if not everyone will think Johnny Depp is a hideous monster. And I can speak with an Old English accent if I want to" (He really did in this movie, so unlike his pirates accent)

"Chocolat".....

"Of course must show off my musical talent....I am a guitarist you know. I am a serious actor. I will sing and show off my musical talent when the script requires me to. Professionalism what"

"Once upon a time in Mexico...''

"Of course, I can be an action hero if I want to be. But nah....I'll rather be the bad guy"

"Secret Window...."

"See, I told you I'll rather be the bad guy. I'm a psycho-killer now" (Note: He did act as a psycho-killer inside...though it didnt seem to be like it at first.)

"The Astronaut's wife"

"I can't do bad guys all the time...I need to be more emotionally in touch as an actor what. And who says I don't look good as a blond-head?"

"Finding Neverland"

"I told you I can speak in like an English gentleman. What's so difficult about the old English accent?"

"Did I tell you I love children?"

"The libertine"

"I really don't wish to brag about my talent in accents."

"The Corpse Bride"

"I love children! Not bones! And I told you I won't brag about my talent in accents"

Ok....that is about all...I realize if I continue this entry will be soooo long that people will fall asleep before they finished reading this...pardon me for that...but I just have to dedicate one entry for my fav. actor...

Before I go off...

Hee....Sorry...Cant resist...

Johnny Depp bades a tearful goodbye...on my behalf.

(Post note: For your information, he is as old as my mum. Born in the year of 1963.)

Recent photos...

2007-05-23T01:04:00.000+08:00

[Some random photos taken recently...]

Here are some photos taken with dear.....

Dear looked so sian here....

So after I went to the kitchen and flash the knife at him...
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There! Much better right?

This is one of a kind! I think it is the only photo I have with me feeding a dog...and this dog's name is Milo and he belongs to the Xue family.

AND we went to Siloso beach and Palawan beach with nice sceneries=)

Don't ask me why, I just love this picture. So soothing just looking at it.

Of course...me and dear took some photos there...

Another one of a kind photo...pardon me if you feel that it upsets your stomach looking at this photo, but really, it is the ONLY photo that I have of me wearing a bikini(it's true la!! some idiots don't believe me, think I dye hair means must be ALWAYS taking photos of myself wearing bikinis), though it was not the first time I am wearing it.

Below are some cute photos of dear that I had captured on camera on that day...

Just like a kid...climbing up the COCONUT tree....what for???

So that he could sleep like a koala bear.

The things boys do sometimes....really. Infuriatingly cute.

Freaking out right now...

2007-05-18T00:08:00.000+08:00

[The case of the neverending work....and assignments..]

Well...I really should be sleeping now. But because I have so many things I haven't done or on the process of doing, I decided to list it down...according to their level of urgency...

1) My @$@#$#%#%! assignment for the module Meaning and development of Play. Both the 12 chapters mind map AND the 6 page reflection....(school)

2) My learning centre materials, the math centre, language arts and dramatic.(work)

3) My math notice board. (work)

4) Developmental records of individual children. (work)

5) Literacy programme. (work)

6) Documentations...photoboard. (work).

7) Planning of KIC - puppet show. [How the hell to do this???] (work)

8) Unit learning presentation. (work)

9) My portfolio assignment, with planning of interview questions and interviewing. (school)

I can't recall anymore. I hope that is about all. Cos' it is ALOT OF BLOODY WORK still need to do and brush up!!!!!!!!!

I am so freaking out right now. It is already bad enough that there are so many work from work I haven't done, I still have my stupid assignments from my degree course to worry about. It's not as if I have done all and well already. EEEEEKK!!!!!!!!!!!!

Moral of story: DON'T work AND study at the same time.

Flu days...

2007-05-14T21:50:00.000+08:00

[My red nose]

Firstly, I really got to thank people who showed concern cos' of my previous entry. You guys are really my true good pals:) I am touched.

That aside, I am having my infamous flu. Like what dear would say, I am having rudolph the red nose right now.

Despite the fact that I was sneezing my nose and possibly my whole head off ever since four in the afternoon at the centre, rubbing my nose as if I want to rip it off my face (well, I was really tempted to, I tell you.), my eyes are so watery that I feel like I am crying, I am fine, really. Even though I feel like a wreck.

I feel so terrible that I can't do my work properly...I was so slow (mind you, I was only marking the children's work) that my dear Joie(a girl in my class) was telling me, "Teacher Joyce, faster do. Later you don't have time to finish."

Well, really, I don't know whether to laugh or cry. That was MY famous line. I always tell them that I will talk to them after I finish my work, and I always say I won't have time to finish my work if I stopped work to talk to them first.

So I told Joie that it is not that I want to do my work slowly, it is just that I am feeling so terrible due to all the constant sneezing and mucus coming out (GROSS!) that I have to stop to rest from time to time.

Dear Joie said, "Ok. But you must quickly do after resting ok? If not you can't finish your work."

I am touched. Really. It is good to know that not only my children are concerned about my work, they also developed the kind of gan chiong attitude that I have whenever I realised that I have a lot of work to do but I don't have enough time to finish it.

But what really made my day was this scenario:

Me: *Sniffs* "AH CHOO!!!" (Rubbing my nose vigorously and wiping away my mucus with a piece of tissue that Joie hands me)

Javier Tock: "Teacher Joyce, what are you doing?" (Appearing out of nowhere)
Me: "I am rubbing my nose cos' it's itchy and trying to mark your work at the same time."
Joie: "Shh...don't disturb Teacher Joyce, lah."
Me: "AH CHOO!" *Sniffs*
Javier Tock: "Oh...Teacher Joyce, you are very pretty."
Me: *Sniffs* "Huh?" (Continued rubbing my nose)
Javier Tock: "You are very pretty. My mummy say you are pretty. I say you are prettier than my mummy."
Me: (In a daze from all the rubbing) "Oh...thank you." [P/S: If you think I sound unappreciative, it's cos' I often hear compliments like this from the children. So for people out there who love to be complimented every single day, be a preschool teacher.]

Then as Javier was still standing there, continue staring at me as I rubbed my nose...his words clicked inside my head...
Me: "Javier, with my red nose, I am still pretty ah?" (Rubbing my nose continuously, eyes half closed)
Javier: "Yeah, Teacher Joyce, you very pretty." (Continue standing and looking at me.)
Joie: "Yeah, Teacher Joyce, you are very pretty."
Shermaine: "Nose red red also pretty."

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.....

I find that really sweet. I mean, children usually meant what they say, due to their innocence,....so who doesn't like to hear sincere compliments about them? Especially when you are feeling real lousy? Cos' I was feeling real lousy, both health wise and esteem wise, cos' really, red nose and droopy tired eyes are so NOT attractive, with parents walking in, I looked anything BUT professional.

But my children made my day. Who needs a boy friend to tell me I am pretty when I feel ugly(which he doesnt), when I have so many children, both boys and girls, staring at me and telling me I am pretty and nice and meaning it, despite looking like Rudolph the red nose reindeer?

They must love me a lot to say I am nice and pretty, cos' I never fail to scold them every single day.

I really love them..............as Shermaine put it, they are all my "k1 darlings". ^_^

No mood....

2007-05-13T23:21:00.000+08:00

[Really no mood..]

I am feeling really down. Just really really down.

No mood for anything....no mood for assignment....no mood for work....no mood to even stay at home or go out.

I only want to get out of here. Go away from here. Get out from Singapore.

Am I human to feel this way? Maybe I am suffering from a burnout...or whatever you call it. Thing is, I cant afford to at the moment. There are so many things at work for me to do.

I'm also feeling sad cos' of him. Though I don't have any mood to mention what happen now.

This entry is depressing.

Warning: Long entry ahead

2007-05-08T22:03:00.000+08:00

[Photos, photos, and more photos]

I was looking back at my previous entry. *GASP!*

The last entry was more than a month ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gosh. I mean, I know I haven't been blogging for awhile. OK, make that a looooooooong while. But I didn't realise it was THAT long ago since I last blog....

Oh wellz....lots of things had happened. As usual, I was busy. The reason (for those of you who are concerned and wondering what happened to me) for my long absence was simple: my internet connection was cut off, and my busy mum was too busy to get it reconnect back by giving payment to starhub cable.

Anyway, since I haven't blog for soooo long, I have quite a number of photos to show you people!

First up....staff retreat on 12-13th April:

We went to Pulai Springs at JB for the staff retreat. Nice resort that we stayed in, as there are two bedrooms in our room, and a living room to watch tv. We can even watch Singapore channels, just that most of the time we were not in the room to watch anyway. Of course, as usual, there was a dinner and dance. On the whole, the experience was quite fun, as it certainly beats staying at the centre!

P/S: Pardon me for the poor photo quality. I am still purchasing my photoshop!

Yeah, ME lah, being vain, showing off my so called "Latino" outfit for the dinner and dance. Just like what the CEO of our NTUC childcare said...it is a STUPID theme.

Me and pretty Lina...She looked more korean than latino on that day. Who cares???? As long as she looks good!

Me, the k1 teacher, Lina the k2 teacher, and Lakshmi, the nursery teacher. Together, we are the CCK unit learning gang!LOL!! And lakshmi looks so pretty that day:) (Probably cos' I never see her in the Indian costume before.)

The whole NTUC Childcare CCK staff! Note: Look at P/S above.

Me and my godsister, Teacher Lay Hoon:)

Me and my partner in crime *hehe*. She is my k1 darlings' chinese teacher, thus, my partner in crime:)

That's abt all the photos I have for my staff retreat...coming up next...the labour day outing with the Shawl Girls!!!! I finally got to meet up ah meow!!

And *Sobs*, I just realised that Jes hasn't sent me some photos...so the photos I have are more or less the same, and hence, I only uploaded two photos:( Still, I have to tell you that we took the photos at Starbucks and Minds Cafe separately.

Me and the exotically pretty ah meow!!!! At Starbucks cafe:)

The Shawl Girls!!!! Hahahaha:)

Well....when Jes sent me the photos and I send her what I have, I can upload the rest:)

Anyway, the following are two photos that I have taken with some of my sec sch best and close pals:)

From left: Pretty and career woman KaiNi, cute Clara and plain ol' me!

From left, clockwise direction: Weng yan, Suqi, KaiNi, Hui(otherwise known as Clara) and me!

This outing was at IMM. I am grateful to have this bunch of true friends as they remind me of the better times during my sec sch, and that not all of the people from my sec sch were fake and befriend you for a motive or backstabbers.

Enough of showing all the photos of my friends and outings...now I am going to show you something really interesting and touching (at least to me, it is.) that my children did. Or rather, a child in my class did.

As you know, working as a childcare teacher, I will receive gifts from time to time from the children. Of course, teachers' day I will receive more, but on usual days I do as well. Sometimes I receive drawings from children (the k1s) cos the toddlers and playgrp are too young to do any drawings. Anyway, below are some of the things that I have received before:

Given during my attachment days...

Ditto...

These are things that of course, as a teacher, I am touched. As long as the children give me something, I will be touched and keep them, NO MATTER WHAT THEY GIVE. (Yes, cos' they are all sweet and sensible children, so none of them will give me RUBBISH, if those of you who were wondering whether I will keep rubbish if the children give it to me.) Hence, I have a whole collection of drawings that I have no idea where to stall them now, since there are so many of them.

However, below is the most unusual gift I have received:
Guess what is it???
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Ta-dah!!!!!!!

Surprise??? (Congrats to those who have guessed it, but no prizes).

This was given to me by one of the girls in my class. She insisted on bringing it for me just because I said I like barbie dolls. I was very touched.

So moral of the story is, be careful of telling the children that you teach what you like or what you wish for. They just might get you that.

That's abt all...